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Name: Emily
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Question Is it just me? - December 31st 2010, 03:33 PM


It may be a bit strange but I am sure my parents have ruined my life, well not internally but they way they raised me has been awfu. I just want to know if I am being childish in thinking this, or if other people think the same. I'm going to go into a rant now, sorry

When I was 7 we moved house. I know lots of children do this and they are fine, but I think of it as the moment my life went downhill. I didn't want to leave my friends or house, I got really upset and all my parents said was, "You'll make new friends, now stop being silly" I found it hard to make friends and I loved my old friends so much. I had been friends with one of them since I had been born. We wrote to each other for a while, but we've lost contact now. I still miss them so much now.

I started my new school on my 8th birthday, which was pretty horrible. I spent a few months with no friends. My parents had thought I had settled down and was happy because they were. I spent so many nights crying back then, I still do now to be honest. I found one girl eventually. She wasn't one of the popular girls so I got teased a bit. I wasn't to bothered about it though.

More recently I have realised my parents prefer my brother. (I think I wrote about it before?) My brother is really smart and does really well in everything. I try but I always feel I need to do as well or they will be disappointed. For example, I had my English mark back with was a A, and the first thing my dad said was "Why didn't you get and A*?" (A+ for any americans reading this ) I was so proud of myself until that moment, it really hurt. My parents knew I felt they preferred my brother and told me was being silly and they loved me as well. I know they do but it hurts so much. I have grown to accept it now and my parents keep joking about it and I play along. They don't know I still feel the same way. There's no point in telling them because it won't change anything.

He programs all these little game things which are pretty good and my parents love them. I don't do anything. I like drawing, but it's just not as impressive as what he does. He always gets all lot more praise for a game than I do for a silly little drawing. I just wish I could do something to make them proud of me. I know they need to support my brother as well and I'm proud of him as well, I just want them to realise I can do some nice things as well even if they aren't as impressive.

I can't trust my parents at all. If I want something or if something goes wrong I am too scared to ask for help. My dad thinks if he knows something everyone else must know it as well and acts like I'm stupid if I ask for help. So now I just try to work it out myself. I was quite depressed a few years ago and I was too afraid to tell them so I had to work though it on my own. It's the same if I feel upset now, I just deal with it by myself, or go online for advice.

I love my parents so much and I am grateful for everything they have done for me but I just feel like because of them I can't be myself and I am always worried they won't like anything. Do you think I am being ungrateful and childish?

Anyway, have a good new years.
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Re: Is it just me? - January 1st 2011, 01:26 AM

No i don't think you are being childish and its ok to rant ! That's what this site if for ranting and asking for advice!

I can imagine moving when your seven years old can be hard for you , making new friends was always hard for me too.

I have a suggestion, if you remeber your old friends names you can look them up on a social networking site ! <---- (:

I had an older brother too and i can relate to you . My brother got straight a's, he was popular, he had a lot of girlfriends, he was confident, and he also had this strong connection with my mom that i can't have cause we just dont get a long. My mom prefers my brother more. I know its hard trying to impress your parents.

You should tell your parents how you feel about this and trusts that your dad doesn't open up his mouth and spreads stuff!

My mom's like that too and its sooo annoying!!!! lol

You and me have another thing in common , we are both grateful for our parents but we just can't communicate with them. So Draw them something meaningful and then just talk to them and get them to understand you.

Pm me if you need anything else i hope i helped!

Some things are beautiful because they are un-obtainable <3

'A dream is what you desire if anything and everything is possible.'
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