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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Dying To Get Out
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Name: Amanda
Age: 28
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Unhappy family - Stress - March 2nd 2009, 12:35 AM

I am not sure at all if this is where it goes because its to do with stress but i will put it here because it has a lot do to with my family

i am mainly concerned because i am 17 almost 18 years old and i have a stressful life, which can be typical but anyway... i have a family of nine soone to be three brothers 15, 13 and not born yet and 3 sisters, 11, 7 and 3... i am the oldest of them all

i am graduating this year and having taking on a lot in the last 3 years. with a move and losing friends. I have no one to talk to anymore and my mom lays all her marriage problems on me.. I am lying from my mom about my love life, she doesn't know i have a boyfriend or anything becuase i know she wouldn't approve because of 1 his age, 2 we met online..

i am really concerned because i know stress can kill you and i am only 17 and have heart problems as it in and the stress makes it hurt alot and i am scared that i am going to have a heart attack before i turn 20. I don't want that but i can\t get rid of it.

I have tried to talk to my mom about how i feel but she takes it wronga nd my brother and sisters fight so much and so do my parents and i just came back from a holiday where all my extend family was fighting and i know my grandma isn't very healthy and i don't think she's going to be there when i get married. I worry about my mom and my friends sooo much and i know that its bad but i can't stop. I get stressed out where i work because my manager is not very nice to me and yells at me alot even when i do the right things. I volunteer in the afternoon with a coass of wonderful grade 2 students but their teacher stresses me out. I am graduating so i have the pressure to be prefect from my family...


I need someone to talk to, i know that... i am just scared too thats all. becuase i don't want anything to happen to my mom or dad or siblings.. I just can't take it and i know i am depressed but once again its blown off ffor being emotional but when this is how i fell 80% of the time i know its something different.

I don't really know what i am asking for, maybe some tips of what to do becuase i have done alot already and still havent gotten any better. I know other people have similar to exact problems. How do you deal with it?
   
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Re: family - Stress - March 2nd 2009, 09:04 PM

Hi Amanda!
Wow - it sounds like your life is extremely tough for you; you shouldn't have to have so much pressure to deal with at your age and there should be at least some way the strain can be lifted from you. You need to give yourself a break, have 'you' time where you just relax and have fun because at the moment it seems like you're doing everything for other people leaving no time for yourself - correct me if i'm mistaken though.

Have you been to the doctor about this? Too much stress causes high blood pressure and it's not good for a girl of your age as like you said this can lead to all sorts of problems and we don't want you having a heart attack! What do you mean by you 'can't get rid of it?' do you already have heart problems? You should really speak to someone about this as i can tell it is getting you down.

Take care of yourself <3


& it's just like she's in another world.
[<3]


   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Dying To Get Out
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Re: family - Stress - March 4th 2009, 02:27 AM

i do have heart problems already, not something major just a heart murmur but i was told stress can only hurt it more. And i have constant pain in my chest.
I do, do things for myself, but only once in a while.. i mean movie every 3 or 4 months with a friend, dinner out. I have the nights some times for myself i guess, when i am not working or doing the piles of homework

But thats for replying it means alot that someone cares
   
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glittermist Offline
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Re: family - Stress - March 4th 2009, 04:28 PM

Do you have something like a careers/life advisor where you live? Where i live we have this organisation called 'Connexions' and the staff there basically try and help out/guide you in areas such as: education, career, family, money worries etc. Do you have something like that where you live? I think you should try to enquire as i'm sure it would be really useful at a time like this for you.

After you graduate, do you know what you are going to do? Will you be moving out?

As for your heart murmur - do you get check-ups regularly for this? I hope that you take the doctors advice seriously and try not to get too stressed out. I know certain things make you stressed but try and relieve that stress by reading a book; playing a sport; listening to music etc.

Take care x



& it's just like she's in another world.
[<3]


   
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