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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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NisaBoo818 Offline
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Unhappy My dad has NO respect for me . . . . - May 31st 2011, 03:18 AM

My dad and i used to get along GREAT up until i turned . . . 10?? Somewhere around there. Since then he's been treating me like crap. He sits around doing nothing and only points out what i do wrong, NEVER what i do right or well. I'm a straight A student, NOTHING. I'm in FBLA and my team got 2nd place, NOTHING. My parents get constant compliments on my manners and maturity, NOTHING. But when i leave my shoes on the stairs i get yelled at for ten minutes straight and then i go to my room and cry. I've tried talking to him about how i feel about what he says to me but the last time i tried i got told that, and i quote, "That's some serious bull shit. I'm not listening to this." And he walked out to his truck and drove away. I'm seriously hurt by this because i don't feel like i've done anything to make him mad at me. Does anyone have any advice on talking to him, dealing with him, or just . . . advice in general. I'm tired of crying.


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Re: My dad has NO respect for me . . . . - May 31st 2011, 04:51 AM

I'm really sorry that your parents are putting you through this. I can understand why you would feel hurt by this. It's quite unfortunate that your parents are only seeing the negative things. As humans, we naturally only focus on the negatives because they seem to affect us more. The reason why they only see the negatives is unknown. Maybe you're doing things that are different than what they are wanting you to do. I think you should try talking to them again when they are in a good mood. Tell them that you do what you can to try and please them, and that you feel like the good things are never recognized. Ask them what their expectations are of you. Tell them that you would like praised for some of the good things that you do. If you don't feel comfortable talking to them in person, maybe you can write them a letter explaining all that you're feeling. Then leave it for them before school. This helps because you can get everything you want to say out on paper in an organized way. And by leaving it before school, they will read it and have the day to process it and decide how they want to handle it. And also, when you're talking to them, make sure you keep a calm tone and don't accuse them of anything. Because that will backfire and make them mad. Best of luck! Take care<3


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Re: My dad has NO respect for me . . . . - May 31st 2011, 04:57 AM

Hey Nisa,
The way your dad is treating you doesn't sound fair. When you feel like it's the right moment try and have a chat with your dad, let him know what is bothering you and how much his behaviour is affecting you.
Sometimes parents are under a lot of pressure and stress and stupid things like shoes being left on the stairs and things being a little messy can bother them more than it usually would when they're relaxed and in a good mood.
Try and tidy up after yourself and be a little bit responsible for your possessions, you'd be surprised how much little bits of effort can effect your relationship. You never know by doing this you could start to turn things around. You just have to get there with little things.
Maybe there is something that is stressing your dad out more than usual, try speaking to him and see if there is anything you can do around the house to help try and ease stress for him a little bit.
I'm sure if your dad sees you're there to help that he has to stop being so hard on you because you're not doing anything wrong.

Best of luck,
Paige
   
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