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I found my father but Im in tears HELP - June 2nd 2011, 06:13 PM

I just found my father after ten years of looking.... He emailed me right when I was about to call this whole thing quits, it took me two hours just to type the reply, I am so mixed with emotions, and I'm crying, laughing, just all at once.... I have been e-mailing and thanking all the people that have helped me... I guess I never thought what would I do when I find him it is like a NOW WHAT? how do I go about this, how do I meet him, will he want to spend time with me, be in my life, how do I replace the guy that has been here for ten years although my stepfather is abusive how do I do it. I'm I taking the wrong approach?


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Re: I found my father but Im in tears HELP - June 2nd 2011, 06:25 PM

You are not taking the wrong approach. Its completely 100% okay to have all these emotions right now. You just found your father! Its okay to have all these questions and such.
I don't know for sure because this has never been a situation for me but from what I think, I think if he didn't want to get to know you and be in your life somehow he wouldn't have emailed you.
Just take it slow though, don't think too far into right now. After talking to him and seeing how that goes that is when you should start asking those questions.


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Re: I found my father but Im in tears HELP - June 2nd 2011, 06:28 PM

I just feel soo much relief that I found him and my stomach is turning and I'm sure this is emotional for him as well, but I just can't keep my eyes off the email waiting for a reply.... My mom knew I was looking for him but she said I would never find him, and now I don't know if I even want to tell her, I don't know how to say mom look I found my dad and she doesn't support this man at all


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You'd better know that in the end, Its better to say too much, Than never to say what you need to say again" - John Mayer

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Re: I found my father but Im in tears HELP - June 2nd 2011, 08:41 PM

Hey Bethany,
I know exactly how you feel. While I spoke to my father on occasion, I did not actually meet him until I was 14 years-old. It was an awkward, yet happy time for me, although I haven't seen him since and this is on my own accord.
Try exchanging a few e-mail's with him first before you decide to meet up. Do it in a public place, where it's less likely to be awkward. Like a restaurant, or a park. Just try to get to know each other before hand so there is a less likely chance of it becoming awkward and filled with silence.
I'm sure your father is just as happy about meeting you, as you are about meeting him. It's quite difficult for a parent to lose a child, whatever the circumstances, and I'm sure he's been trying to find you as well.
I wish you the best of luck with everything!











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Re: I found my father but Im in tears HELP - June 2nd 2011, 08:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ShannonPants View Post
Hey Bethany,
I know exactly how you feel. While I spoke to my father on occasion, I did not actually meet him until I was 14 years-old. It was an awkward, yet happy time for me, although I haven't seen him since and this is on my own accord.
Try exchanging a few e-mail's with him first before you decide to meet up. Do it in a public place, where it's less likely to be awkward. Like a restaurant, or a park. Just try to get to know each other before hand so there is a less likely chance of it becoming awkward and filled with silence.
I'm sure your father is just as happy about meeting you, as you are about meeting him. It's quite difficult for a parent to lose a child, whatever the circumstances, and I'm sure he's been trying to find you as well.
I wish you the best of luck with everything!
thanks!!!! Is it okay that I keep this private til' I am ready to meet him... it has been ten years


"Have no fear for giving in, Have no fear for giving over
You'd better know that in the end, Its better to say too much, Than never to say what you need to say again" - John Mayer

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Re: I found my father but Im in tears HELP - June 3rd 2011, 05:02 PM

Since another thread has been created regarding this issue, I'm going to close your older thread. =)






   
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