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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
The Darkness Offline
Nothing Began Everything
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I just want too much. - June 19th 2011, 07:39 AM

My friend has betrayed me.
She asked for forgiveness and she knows how fragile my trust is.
I forgave her.
She promised to make things up, to make things better. She really wanted to regain my trust. And I was all up for it. And she said that she would be the best friend I ever had.
I mean, I know I shouldn't count on promises.
After that, a day after, she didn't hang out with me.
And the day after.
And the week after.
And weeks after.
When I saw her on the halls, I'd wave, she would ignore or not notice.
I called her, and we spoke for a while, then she'd interrupt me, saying she had to do something and that she'd call me back. She never did.
I have trouble making friends, having friends, and she knew that.
And her distancing herself from me was hurting me.
I told her how I was feeling. Finally getting to sit her down with me and talk.
She disregarded it and said that she was leaving. And she left me alone.
She apologized for that later on.
And that was after she saw I wasn't wearing the necklace I usually do, signifying our undying friendship.
After that, she avoided me completely. I never saw her about, she never answered my phone calls, texts, anything.
I asked some friends who had classes with her and they saw her about.
In the class I had with her, she ditched.
I have been missing her ever since.
She was my only friend who ever really cared about me.
I felt as if I finally found my salvation, the one person who cared for me for once in my life.
I gave up my internet friends who kinda cared for me, but cared some regardless.
I depended on her, and I know I shouldn't have.
I hallucinated her when I was having my seizures.
I subconsciously etched her name on my leg on the last day of school when she ditched entirely.
I'm just hurting so much because of her.
And I think it's all my fault.


THE POINT OF SINGULARITY IS NOTHING AS NOTHING BEGAN EVERYTHING
PULSING IN THE EXPAND CONSUME WITHOUT BARRIER OR BORDER
IT IS DARK BECAUSE IT IS THE DARKNESS IT IS OVER BECAUSE IT IS THE END
THERE IS NO SENTRY BECAUSE NONE DARE APPROACH
IT HAS NEVER BEEN AND IT IS ALL THAT EVER WAS
AT THE CENTER YOU DO NOT FIND THE ANSWER
YOU DO NOT FIND YOURSELF THERE IS NO CENTER AND THERE IS NO YOU THERE IS ONLY MADNESS
WE ARE ALL HERE NOW.
WE ARE ALL HERE.
WE ARE.

   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Rooni3 Offline
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Re: I just want too much. - June 19th 2011, 08:53 AM

That is not your fault. I've been dealing with this problem for some time and I've gotten through bad friendships like these through new ones. People can really be untrusting and it can also be because over time people grow apart, it's unfortunate but common. My only advice from personal experience would be to move on to other greater things and make new friends. It all takes time, things will get better. Everything happens for a reason, and now you should feel a weight lifted off you because you can see her true colors.
   
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SparklingWine Offline
Normality, my friends.
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Re: I just want too much. - June 19th 2011, 05:11 PM

Hey there,

I don't think that this is your fault at all. I don't see what you did wrong in this picture. I know you think your friend cares about, but based on the information that you gave us here- it doesn't really seem like she does to you. Trying to patch things up, then ignoring you, then saying she will call you back and never does, avoiding you completely, not willing to try and talk things out, is an indication to me that she doesn't care. Of course, there could be things that you're not saying in your post that would suggest otherwise. I think that you should try and make new friends. This one clearly isn't being a friend to you at all, and is hurting you. To make new friends, can you join a club or a sport that is interesting to you? What things do you like to do? Another good way is by simply making small talk with people. I know that can be hard, and can really get your nerves going, but sometimes, to make friends, you have to put yourself out of your comfort zone. And really, you may be shy, but tons of other people are, so, you're not alone in this. I know losing a friend is hard. That I understand all too well. But friends are going to come and go as time goes on. Maybe this might be the time to let go of this friend, even though it's hard, because losing a friend is never easy.


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