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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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jakeeeboy Offline
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i need some help (of course) - March 12th 2009, 02:02 AM

to everyone who will listen,

I'm new here, i don't know how you guys post your problems, but this is how i'm going to post mine.


i used to have a good life. back when i was 6. My parents divorced when i was 9, and now they don't even come close to comprehending my issues with them. i feel like the only competent person in either of my households. i still live with both of my parents, we switch parents every week. i dont have any friends near either of my parents houses. the people that i label "friends" torture me daily. i cant go to my parents because they will make a big deal about it, although its starting to seem like a big deal. i used to listen to country and pop, but now i need my music to reflect my feelings, i listen to hard rock, metal, and alternative rock now. i know it seems like no biggie, but you don't know how much ive been deprived of because of the divorce, i have never been to a rockets game, and probably never will, never been to a concert, havent gone to see a movie in about a year, and my parents are smoking now more than ever. they are literally killing me from the inside with the secondhand smoke. it might not seem like a big deal to you, but i want my old life back. i would give up everything for an average life.

thanks for your concern,
jake
   
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love2laugh Offline
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Re: i need some help (of course) - March 12th 2009, 03:37 AM

This may sound really harsh but, you're not going to get your old life back. You have to make the most of your new life. Talk to your parents about what's bothering you. If your friends aren't that great, find new ones! I know it'll be hard, but a lot of this is a mindset.


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Jessielove Offline
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Re: i need some help (of course) - March 12th 2009, 04:17 AM

I agree with love2laugh.
Everyone goes through hard times.
And you're changing to add to the fact. You're 13, we all change as we get older. When I turned 13 I went from being a tomboy to being a scene kid.
As for the friends, make new ones. Sure, it's hard, but sooner or later you'll realize it was worth it.
Life will get better at some point, you just gonna work through. Not everything is gonna be good, just smile and brush it off. It could always be worse.


When you fall, don't always expect someone to pick you up. Do it yourself, you're stronger then you think. Brush yourself off and keep your head high.

"She loves me, she loves me not, despite the fact I smell like pot, I write this poem to you Jessie, are you my lady love to be?" -
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Re: i need some help (of course) - March 12th 2009, 04:37 AM

you just can make a change in your life if you go and talk with your parents as to what you want.........as they are your parents i am sure that they will consider what you are saying and you just might get one or two rockets games atleast
   
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Re: i need some help (of course) - March 12th 2009, 11:00 AM

hey jake.

firstly, you've got to talk more to your parents... and tell them how much the second hand smoke thingy is bothering you. and i know this life is not easy . at all. but the thing is.. you have to tell both your parents how much you miss both of them together.

and i know this will seem far-fetched. but try ( i know it'll be hard ) bringing your parents together and have them remember the reason they first fell in love in the first place so the drama, i know. but sometimes in life.. you've gotta go the extra mile. I believe that everything can be right again.. cause you deserve that happy life cause you're an individual. EVERY individual deserves to be happy

in case you need any support, always remember we're right here


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DemonQueen Offline
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Re: i need some help (of course) - March 12th 2009, 11:32 AM

I would definately talk to your parents about this, Jake. Tell them everything you've told us. About the friend situation, the smoking situation. My parents are separated and I, too, have never been to a game or a concert. It's like they keep you to themselves, right? Explain that to them as well. Let them know you want to have a life and while you're still young you want to get the most out of it.

While you are only 13 I am going to tell you this - it does get easier. I was 13, too. I know how it feels to have no friends around and to do things pretty much by yourself. But it does get easier. If you need anything at all just send me a PM, I'll check it ASAP. Just talk to your parents and make sure they're together when you do it. They'll need to talk to you and to each other as well. Who knows, maybe this can all work out for the better and your parents could get back together? Mine did.


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Strider Offline
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Re: i need some help (of course) - March 12th 2009, 09:41 PM

Hi there Jake,

Have you tried talking to your parents about this? It's always tough when parents split up, but they still care about you. They may just be stressed and think they don't have time to go to games, concerts, or movies. The best thing to do about this is to just talk to them and ask them if they want to do these things with you. Sometimes you need to take the initiative to get them going.

As for your 'friends', I don't think you should be hanging around anyone who is torturing you. That's not a good thing at all. I suggest trying to talk to new people at your school or joining an activity out of school where you can meet some new people.

Nat.


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Re: i need some help (of course) - March 12th 2009, 09:51 PM

thanks all you guys for the help and advice. its gunna take some time before i have a chance to work it out with my parents. as for my friends, i've already been working on deciding who my "you can always lean on me" friends are. I can tell already that 90% of my "friends" arent worth the trouble. You guys have already been a bigger help than i could have hoped for. Thanks for all the help!

-Jake
   
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