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Unhappy Somethings wrong with me !!!! - August 5th 2011, 05:08 PM

Sorry -may be in the wrong place! Feel free to move...

There must be something wrong with me.
I dont have any friends. Literally nobody talks to me. And I try so hard to be friendly. But I give up!!
I'm extremely shy, to the point where I forget my words and all Im thinking of the this irrational fear...I wish I could become more confident. People have told me that it will get better with time, but actually, since seveth grade its gotten much worse.

But Im also to blame; whenever I find a new friend, or at least someone I have something in common with, I always seem to find fault in them. Like "no one is good enough for me". Its absolutely ridiculous!
I'm afraid that Im going to be alone forever and I dont know how to stop being so judgemental and snobbish (and shy).

Also, I kind of find it difficult to keep friendships/relationships when I do have them. The tiniest thing will always piss me off. When someone says something to me that I dont really like, I get so upset and have horrible urges to SH. When people get angry with me, Ill admit: I never take responsibility. Instead I get furious at them!

So my questions are:

-How do I become more confident? Do I need therapy or something, or will it just sort itself out as I get older?

-Is it normal for shy childrens' symptoms to worsen when they become adholecents/teenagers?

-Any advice for how I can stop being so judgemental/snobbish and to just accept peoples' imperfections?

-Stop being so sensitive about what people say to the point where I feel like SHing?

-Also, basically my whole life is a fantasy. I have invented a fantasy world where I have perfect friends, perfect boyfriend, live in my dream place (europe). It is taking over my WHOLE LIFE! All I can think about, every minute of the day, is my world. This is also probably one of the reasons that nobody is good enough, because they are not as perfect as my fantasy friends. So, any advice on how to STOP this?

Sorry if this is a bit long, but thanks for reading. Advice? Pleease


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bailatyvm Offline
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Re: Somethings wrong with me !!!! - August 5th 2011, 05:56 PM

Hm; well, this might not be a Mental Health thing, it might be more of an attitude adjustment thing, since you said you find fault in people..but I don't know, since I don't actually know you.

-How do I become more confident? Do I need therapy or something, or will it just sort itself out as I get older?
Therapy could help. You might have low self-esteem problems, and therapy is extremely helpful in that case. But yeah, it could sort itself out..usually you need a strong support system for that though, which I'm not sensing that you have.

-Is it normal for shy childrens' symptoms to worsen when they become adholecents/teenagers?

Yes, especially if it's not helped when you're younger. At this point, you're going to have to go way out there sometimes just to get out of the shy-ness zone.

-Any advice for how I can stop being so judgemental/snobbish and to just accept peoples' imperfections?
Simply don't judge. I know that sounds impossible, but if you just accept people for the way they are it'll be more helpful in the long run. Realize that you have imperfections, and so do they, and imperfections make a person who they are.

-Stop being so sensitive about what people say to the point where I feel like SHing?
You do sound like you have low self-esteem. If it's something you know is a lie, you have to try to forget about it. Personally, I hate feeling like I've done something incorrectly, so I just have to tell myself that I'll try harder next time.

-Also, basically my whole life is a fantasy. I have invented a fantasy world where I have perfect friends, perfect boyfriend, live in my dream place (europe). It is taking over my WHOLE LIFE! All I can think about, every minute of the day, is my world. This is also probably one of the reasons that nobody is good enough, because they are not as perfect as my fantasy friends. So, any advice on how to STOP this?
Ooh, yeah fantasy does lead to disappointment. Instead of realizing that they aren't perfect, why don't you recognize what parts of them are like your fantasy?? And start making your own life your fantasy, with some parts tweaked to inspire you to try to change them?

I hope I helped. Pm if you need to.


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Dark Horse Offline
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Re: Somethings wrong with me !!!! - August 5th 2011, 06:51 PM

Thanks! I'll keep all that in mind when Im at school!! x


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She's Not The Kind You'll Come To Miss

   
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