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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
JeepGirl:) Offline
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Unhappy no one to talk to - September 12th 2011, 12:21 AM

Hey Everyone. I am a 19 year old girl. I go to a local community college and am studying to become a nurse. This spring I hope to transfer to a university and live in a dorm to try to get the full college exiperence. I have a issue with making friends... all throughout high school I never had an easy time making friends. I just don't understand why. Most people that know me think I am really fun to be around and am very sweet. I always wonder whats wrong with me. Another issue I have is my very low eestem. Even though everyone tells me how pretty I am, I just don't believe it. I think because my whole life my dad put me down so much. I had a boyfriend almost 2 years and I was head over heels in love with him. Then he dumped me and it absolutly killed me inside. I loved him so dearly, and am so scared I will not find someone who makes me as happy as he once did. I feel like I have a lot of issues... and very lonely. I have no one to talk to anymore. What's wrong with me?
   
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Re: no one to talk to - September 12th 2011, 12:27 AM

i just started college 2 weeks ago and it seems like everyone has made friends and i havent made any i think living in a dorm would have helped me a lot on making friends (i commute) so i would definatley transfer if i were you


We do not fear death, we fear that no one will notice our absence. That we will disappear without a trace.
   
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Re: no one to talk to - September 12th 2011, 01:16 AM

Hey there, firstly I'd like to welcome you to TeenHelp. I understand exactly how you feel. My whole life I've been known as the "quiet girl" who is sweet and fun to be around, once they got to know me.. I also have very low self-esteem. So here is what I do to help with these issues: I tell myself I'm beautiful everyday. I have post-its on my mirror with encouraging words about myself and everyday I start to believe it a little bit more. My friends tell me great things about myself all the time and it helps a lot. I also write positive things about my personality and do my hair the way I like it to make me feel a little prettier. I also love to exercise to feel better about myself. It always makes me feel a little bit more motivated to live a healthier lifestyle and be happy. It's just the rush that makes me feel... alive. I guess? But yeah, if you make yourself think positive thoughts and tell yourself how great you truly are (like I'm sure you are) then you will eventually start to believe it and you will feel a lot better about yourself. Inside and out. I'm sorry to hear about the breakup but there are so many people out there who will love you for who you are and you will fall in love again and things will start looking up for you. I'm almost sure of it. I believe there's someone out there for everyone. Just hang in there and your time will come. Lastly, I'd like to say that you're not alone and you've definitely came to the right website. TeenHelp will definitely be a great support system to you. I'm here if you ever need someone to talk to. I know it's hard to open up to someone but I've learned that over the internet, it's so much easier. With that said, I hope you do take my advice and reach out to at least one person, whether it be me or not, so you don't feel lonely anymore. Take care, lovely.
   
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Re: no one to talk to - September 12th 2011, 03:58 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JeepGirl:) View Post
Hey Everyone. I am a 19 year old girl. I go to a local community college and am studying to become a nurse. This spring I hope to transfer to a university and live in a dorm to try to get the full college exiperence. I have a issue with making friends... all throughout high school I never had an easy time making friends. I just don't understand why. Most people that know me think I am really fun to be around and am very sweet. I always wonder whats wrong with me. Another issue I have is my very low eestem. Even though everyone tells me how pretty I am, I just don't believe it. I think because my whole life my dad put me down so much. I had a boyfriend almost 2 years and I was head over heels in love with him. Then he dumped me and it absolutly killed me inside. I loved him so dearly, and am so scared I will not find someone who makes me as happy as he once did. I feel like I have a lot of issues... and very lonely. I have no one to talk to anymore. What's wrong with me?
I've had a bit of experience with this because when I arrived at my new school last year I knew absolutely no one. I didn't really have any close friends and those I did have were ones I had made years ago. I didn't like talking to strangers and I still don't really as I am quite shy.

But I do have new and really good friends now but I think it took me getting over my issues first. I always see people giving advice on how to make friends and I can't help but feel they are speaking to confident people. I mean I don't think I could go join a club or whatever then talk to people comfortably.

My advice would be to just strike up conversation with people you see everyday, like in your classes or in your dorm. If you just break the ice you will be able to talk to them again and again and as you see them everyday it's likely you might become friends. People like to talk about themselves. Just tell someone you really like their jacket, or ask them if they know something about whatever, ask them the time or find something you have in common and make a comment about it.

You don't have to be bold, you just have to break the ice and wait for it to happen naturally from there. Maybe tomorrow set yourself a goal, like talking to three people you haven't yet.


To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek joy in the saddest places. To pursue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power. Above all, to watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never, to forget

~Arundhati Roy
   
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Re: no one to talk to - September 12th 2011, 09:18 PM

cant say i can help you with the real life friends issue. but there are plenty of friends to be made on this site Im Jayme, feel free to talk to me anytime


"One day at a time, this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering." -Ida Scott Taylor
   
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