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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Name: Tiffany
Age: 28
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Issues with my mom. - September 18th 2011, 12:59 AM

She is non trusting of my fiance' with signing my car over in his name until i turn 21 which is in feb. When my dad had her car put in his name he tried to take it, even though it was honestly her car first, all because it was in his name. She called me a crazy fool because I want my car in his name, and it is supposed to be my car but she always throws in my face that car belongs to her, which gives her the right to boss the car around, and i have no say so on where my car goes or who uses it or anything. The other day they were all calling me handi capp so I gave the keys back to her, and all she did was give them right back. My fiance' and I want to move to where we want to move, but my always says something like, "Tiffany can't live there, she knows nothing about the place,and she barely knows how to drive" I drive fine. my mom doesn't think I can do anything. She thinks I'm helpless, and it brings my self esteem down. The ones who are making me handi capp are them, because I know once I will try to move out, They will fight we with, because its not what they want. My wedding plans already failed this summer, because they wanted it there way, and we fought more about the wedding, then we did try to plan it, and we used to fight about the car, until it broke down, and now we are about get it fixed finally and its been broke down since april, the engine blew,and its a $500 fix. and so thats why I'm expect a huge fight when we move out. They have already told it to my face, that will never make it out on my own.
   
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SparklingWine Offline
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Re: Issues with my mom. - September 19th 2011, 09:09 PM

You are twenty years old. It's time you start making your own decisions. They can't make decisions for you legally anymore. I would start living for you and your fiance. You're constantly going to be held back by your parents if you continue to let them control you. Move into the house you want. If they don't like it, not your problem. If you like, then that's all that counts. And your wedding plans? Weddings should only come once in a life time (Or twice). But it's YOUR wedding. You're going to be unhappy if you live according to their wants. Plan the wedding you want to plan. If they don't like it, then again, not your problem. You're an adult. You're always going to be treated like a child unless you stick up for yourself and act like an adult.

As far as the car situation goes. Who cares? I'm sure you drive fine. I don't know why your parents treat you the way they do. They could be trying to keep you around for as long as possible. It could be a defense mechanism for you making all these changes in your life. Whatever the reason, you can prove that you're able to handle all these adult situations. Whoes name is the car in right now? If it's in your mothers name, then she can in fact control the car and do what she wants with it. If the car is in your name, then you control it. Not her. Why do you want the car in your finaces name anyhow? If you have control over situations that you know your parents wouldn't like, don't tell them. you don't need the conflict.

I would also tell your parents how much their words hurt you. They're never going to stop saying and doing the things they do unless you put your foot down, and put a stop to it. Stand up for yourself<3


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