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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Xiali Offline
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Exclamation Divorce - October 7th 2011, 11:06 PM

Hey,
So my parents are going through a divorce and normally I don't let situations control my life but recently I feel like all my friends and people I know are avoiding me or think of me as less of a person because of that. I don't understand, it's like they are pushing me away because of my parents new status. Even my friends who don't know about what is going on seem to be doing the same (my friend that know about what's going on and my friend that do, are strangers to each either). I don't know what to do but I'm fed up this pretending game.

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Re: Divorce - October 8th 2011, 12:28 AM

Hello, Mai!

Well, divorces are pretty common nowadays... so I don't really understand why your friends would treat you differently because of it! Chances are, many of them have experienced divorce first-hand, or they've had other close friends who have experienced divorce.

It could be that your friends are just trying to give you space. That's not the same thing as pushing you away (although I can see why it might feel that way). They may feel like you want to avoid the subject, so they avoid the subject as well. They may feel like you're experiencing emotional turmoil, so they're trying to be neutral and let you sort things out on your own. My advice is to speak to each of these friends one-on-one and tell them what you need right now, whether it's someone to talk to, a shoulder to cry on, or a person who can distract you by doing fun things together. If these are really your friends, they'll understand and be more than happy to help you out in any way they can. =)






   
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Re: Divorce - October 13th 2011, 05:59 PM

Hey Mai!
My parents also got a divorce a year ago,so I know how you feel. I always hated when people told me things like: "It's not your fault...bla bla bla..." Of course it's not my fault,they were the ones who had problems not me. I don't know if you experienced something like that. It's kind of silly. But people do it with the best intentions,so you can't really hold it against them. Hahaha.
Anyway,back to topic. I don't think your friends are avoiding you because your parents got a divorce it's far more likely that they don't know how to deal with the situation and don't know how you feel about it and are just trying to give you more space,just like Robin said.
Cheers!
   
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