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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Kaitlyn Offline
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One friend and more fun friends. - March 22nd 2009, 10:49 PM

Making a long story short (trying), my best friend whom I've known since third grade has changed alot over the past year. We have nothing in common and she's become very judgemental, mean and somewhat annoying. She's boring to hang out with.

Then I have my other good friend, I hang out with him and my friends from the next door town. We get along great, have tons in common and have loads of fun just doing nothing. I prefer hanging out with them, so I do. I can't bring my other friend along because she makes everything awkward and always makes go home when she has to, which is early. I've been lying to her and saying I can't hangout because she gets mad when I hang out with my other friends.

I feel like it's getting out of control :/ and she doesn't have a lot of friends to hang out with. Does anybody have some advice, maybe even just some comforting words?


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Re: One friend and more fun friends. - March 22nd 2009, 11:33 PM

Hey Kaitlyn. To be honest, I'm not sure what's the right choice to make in this situation. I can understand the situation you are in, but on the other hand I have been in the same situation as your friend one to many times before, and I know that it might have a big emotional toll on your friend if you were to simply ditch her for the people you feel more comfortable around. I would suggest having a calm and honest talk with your friend, and simply tell her that you don't feel as if you have been as good friends as you had been in the past. I think that it's normal for friends to drift apart sometimes, and find new people that they feel they better click with. But then again, I wouldn't completely walk away from your friend and leave her asking what she did wrong, and what the hell is going on. Like I said, maybe sit down and have a talk with her and tell her that you don't feel as if you have been clicking lately, and see where this goes from there. It may clear up a lot of the confusion, and you may better be able to chose what you think is best to do in the situation that will benefit both you and your friend.





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Kaitlyn Offline
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Re: One friend and more fun friends. - March 23rd 2009, 07:27 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Concrete Girl View Post
Hey Kaitlyn. To be honest, I'm not sure what's the right choice to make in this situation. I can understand the situation you are in, but on the other hand I have been in the same situation as your friend one to many times before, and I know that it might have a big emotional toll on your friend if you were to simply ditch her for the people you feel more comfortable around. I would suggest having a calm and honest talk with your friend, and simply tell her that you don't feel as if you have been as good friends as you had been in the past. I think that it's normal for friends to drift apart sometimes, and find new people that they feel they better click with. But then again, I wouldn't completely walk away from your friend and leave her asking what she did wrong, and what the hell is going on. Like I said, maybe sit down and have a talk with her and tell her that you don't feel as if you have been clicking lately, and see where this goes from there. It may clear up a lot of the confusion, and you may better be able to chose what you think is best to do in the situation that will benefit both you and your friend.
Yeah I've been in her posistion too, actually her and another girl always ditching me aha but that was years ago.

I don't want to completely not talk to her :l it's been getting hard to do just that though..

We've started running once a week together, maybe that will even out some time spent with my other friends..


"I think people want peace so much
that one of these days the government
had better get out of the way and
let them have it."
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
   
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Re: One friend and more fun friends. - March 23rd 2009, 08:50 PM

hey Kaitlyn.

The most important thing to remember is that your friend probably doesnt know that her attitude is turning a lot of people off.

however, you've to see past that. She cant change from a totally likable person to a mean person with an attitude problem WITHOUT anything happening i get the feeling that something drastic happened over the past year to change all that.

i know it might be asking a lot, but you could ask her and talk to her about her attitude and what's causing it. I'm sure that that will help make everything better.after all, i'm sure that no matter what, she still cherishes you as a friend, only thing is that her changed attitude means she treats and perceives everything differently.

definitely talk to her bout everything.. thats what i believe will correct stuff and always remember that you can hang out with your other friend at the same time too!

always ready to help out


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Re: One friend and more fun friends. - March 23rd 2009, 09:13 PM

I'd try and set a day to go out with just this one friend, and maybe try and go out on a group day with some people that she'd be able to make friends with to encourage her to become less attached and dependant on you.




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and remember what you deserve


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