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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Do you guys mind having that one girl in your guy group? - November 12th 2011, 03:20 PM

Do some guys mind having that one girl in the group around?

I'm friends with 3-4 guys and I'm the only girl in their group. Other girls and people generally join at times but mostly I'm with them, get along better with guys. Sometimes though, if any of them are about to swear, they would hide their face or tell me to not listen. I know 3 of them do like having me around, atleast I think so the third one sometimes gives an impression that makes me wonder if theyd prefer guy time. They do say some things in front of me, but sometimes I guess if something gets too guy thing. So if you have a girl in your group, do you mind having her around or guy time. I'm not always around, like they all go to eachothers house. So.. do guys mind having that girl in their group. I was told by two of them they think I'm the coolest girl in our class. The other one talks to me too but I just sometimes think he or maybe the rest all have a problem with this. Would you?
   
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Re: Do you guys mind having that one girl in your guy group? - November 12th 2011, 04:54 PM

You're twenty already, you aren't in fourth grade where people are being kind to you so they aren't scolded by mommy. You're an adult and so are your friends. As adults they choose who and who not to be involved with. If they do not seem to mind your company, then I would assume that is the case.

In the case of the one who seems to avoid you, either he somehow feels that having you around creates a supressed sexual undertone, or else he's just a quiet person. Regardless though, he could avoid you if you didn't enjoy being around you, so I wouldn't worry.

Regarding their behaviours around swearing, it could easily be that they feel that swearing is wrong and feel ashamed, they might be old fashion and think swearing in front of a lady is wrong. They might be trying to protect some delicate, intricate, extremely emotional, (non-existent) female emotional system you have. Or maybe they once dropped the eff-bomb near you and you showed a shocked expression on your face. This has happened to me, and needless to say I toned it down around that person in the future.

To answer your initial question though, I don't mind who I'm friends with. I seek like-minded individuals, and I find for myself, there are so few of them. So If I happened to find someone who ticks just like me I wouldn't turn them down based on race, gender, etc.

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Re: Do you guys mind having that one girl in your guy group? - November 12th 2011, 06:31 PM

Yeahh, I'm in a group of friends where it's just me and my four best male friends (: It's great but sometimes I let them go and do their man things, like..I don't know..look at cars, or whatever boys actually do. We only really have a problem when they want to play COD and I'm outnumbered and bored. They don't have a problem with it.


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Smile Re: Do you guys mind having that one girl in your guy group? - November 13th 2011, 02:14 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JKmadu619 View Post
Regarding their behaviours around swearing, it could easily be that they feel that swearing is wrong and feel ashamed, they might be old fashion and think swearing in front of a lady is wrong. They might be trying to protect some delicate, intricate, extremely emotional, (non-existent) female emotional system you have. Or maybe they once dropped the eff-bomb near you and you showed a shocked expression on your face. This has happened to me, and needless to say I toned it down around that person in the future.


- Justin
First of all if they its wrong to swear in front of a lady or at all, I dont see that as old fashioned Assuming I have a female emotional system is. I don't mind whatever people do and they know that, they just feel they shouldn't in front of a girl. It must also be the culture where I live. Thats the thing some people themselves dont wana be rude about it, its obviously nothing to do with 'telling mommy' I just wonder if some guys prefer guys time. And dont want a girl in their guy group. I know there are guys like that.

Thanks for the response you two.
   
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Re: Do you guys mind having that one girl in your guy group? - November 15th 2011, 07:23 AM

I agree with what Justin said, at you're point in life, what matters is hanging out with people who suit you the best. If they're guys, then so be it. Yes it's true, sometimes guys need a little guy time to talk about things they would only say to guys (you might need to start picking up on hints such as one guy just needing a little guy time for example). Other than that, if they enjoy having you around, and you like having them around, there's no reason to stir anything up and cause tension, even if there's still one guy who is still uneasy about it. After a while, he will start getting used to you being around and will treat you just like any of his other guy friends; just wait and see.


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Re: Do you guys mind having that one girl in your guy group? - November 15th 2011, 08:03 AM

If I were to have a female hang out with my friends during our, "guy time", we'd all be fine if her behaviour and reactions were in line with ours. We do things from play-fighting to xbox gaming to watching movies to a whole lot of dumb stuff (that sometimes ends up being painful), as well as we swear, insult each other and others, make up silly stories that we try to bullshit on others. We've had a few females hang out with us and they're fine with most of it. We've even had other guys join us but many of the females and other guys didn't care for the play-fighting as it can get rough since I've been training in full-contact martial arts for a bit over 8 years (plus help teach) while another guy is less trained (he'd rather brawl), third guy would just wrestle, fourth guy does a bit of everything but nothing amazing and last guy is more passive about it so when he does join in he wrestles.


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Re: Do you guys mind having that one girl in your guy group? - November 15th 2011, 04:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bitesize View Post
Yeahh, I'm in a group of friends where it's just me and my four best male friends (: It's great but sometimes I let them go and do their man things, like..I don't know..look at cars, or whatever boys actually do. We only really have a problem when they want to play COD and I'm outnumbered and bored. They don't have a problem with it.
Me too Haha video games get old after a while. I've learned to just leave when that happens rather than sit & pout.
   
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Re: Do you guys mind having that one girl in your guy group? - November 15th 2011, 08:24 PM

Sometimes its best to give guys some "guy time". I normally hang out with my boyfriend and his friend cuz they invite me and sometimes i just say no go ahead without me because I know that they need some guy time where they can talk about anything without me knowing or listening.


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