where is the line?

[kiwi_fish_bunny]

i had another fight with my Dad. I had chocolates for sale to fundraise and he took them to work without my permission, he ended up with being over $10 short as people stole some. i told dad there was ment to be at least $65 in there, he got all definsive and kept asking me if i was sure, over and over like he didnt trust me. then i had a movie i wanted to see with my bible studies group, i have a few assiments to be done at the moment and one of them due the today, (went to the movie last night) my dad got angry with me for not having that assiment done, because the girl hwho had my notes was away yestersday so i couldnt get the one little bit off of her.
but that wasnt good enough for my dad he got pissed off with me telling me that its not good enough and that next year that i'm going to fail if i do this, (this= mke not being able to do my school work much because ive been having panic attacks and school stresses me out really bad)
and that he wouldnt pick me up next time, and to me that felt like he was saying he was washing his hands of me. all of this was on the foot path outside my youth work, i felt like he just stabbed me seriously, i admire my daddy, he has been my hero, but i can never be good enough for him.

i want to do voluntrary work working in different countries and helping out with kids. and working on growing my faith in God.
my parents hate it, they dont support it.
its dystroying me...

i watched a movie called couragous last night, it was about dads cleaning up their acts as fathers after one guys little girl died.

in the car after i couldnt stop crying. my dads not going to clean his act up.

i feel like he is going to loose me. if he only knew that he is lucky to have me here now alive. maybe he would be a better father. or maybe he will stay the same and just keep pushing me away.

my aunty is getting realy sick and is thinking that there is someone in her closet, its really upsetting hearing that, but my parents dont know that i find this upsetting, they just look at me like i need to accept it

too many things are stressing up on me.

i wanna be a good daughter, but i want to be able to live my life?
where is the line where i need to take control of my own life, because im feeling close to that point now