Non-PG13 (Strong Language): how to make her realize she's looking in the wrong place

[Jennifer]

I hope this goes here and not in the relationship part here on TH. Anyways, my 12 year old cousin is so upset over the fact the guy she has been seeing for the past two years is being shipped away because his mom doesn't think it's right, he's 16--I believe almost 17. The thing is I know she's doing it because her parents (my aunt and uncle) have been drinking and doing drugs since she was young and shes looking for attention. Now she's whining about her life being over and the fact that she doesn't like the fact that this boys mom and the police are invovled. Which I would assume it's because they've been having sex as well.

The real question is how do i tell her what she is doing is stupid and is looking for love in the wrong place. I don't want to say, "Just get over it" because that isn't who I am and I don't want her to push me away thinking I'm crazy. I'm looking for answers here. I am desperately worried about her.

[Nicole!]

I think its best to sit down and talk to her about this. She does need to realize that he wasn't a good guy to be with. You don't have to outright say that she's looking for love in the wrong place and she should just get over it, but I think it is important that someone talks to her about this to explain why its happening. Her life isn't over, she's only 12 and will no doubt meet lots of other guys that she will like.