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My friends and me all tell secrets about each other to each other! - November 25th 2011, 11:10 AM

(Names are changed)
Myself Sofie and my 3 other friends Ellie, Beth and Eve are friends but in the last 2 months Eve was away for a week as she was sick. Me and Beth had plans to come over to my house and when Eve came back it was odd to talk to her again because we just hadnt seen her it what felt like forever!!
When beth cancelled from work Eve was over the moon and in math one day Beth told me that Eve had been telling her since she had come back (1 week ago at this point) that she thought I was obsessed with Beth like REALLY obsessed! When Beth told me this Ellie was sitting behind us (as the tables are for two's only) Ellie sits with a girl Mia (Whos a friend of ours but not relavent to the story) Ellie heard alot of what Beth said and Ellie does anything to fit in, we all love her to death but she acts dumb and air headed when we want to talk to smart Ellie she goes "Whaaa? Whos that?" like she has an iq of 2, when she is acually one of the smartest people i know.
When myself and Beth went to the canteen and Eve and Ellie didnt need to go so they saved us a spot on a grassed area, when me and beth got back Eve was pissed off and Ellie was acting dumb like nothing was wrong.
Myself and Beth know Ellie cant keep anything to herself and that she had told Eve about Beth telling me what Eve thought.
I asked Eve are you okay? and she replys i am very NOT okay and is pissed off at me for the next lesson where myself and Eve sit alone at a table together. We "make up" until very recently when Beth and I were alone like we ALWAYS are as Eve takes Ellie and leaves us like she does in Pe, Science, Geography and all the other lessons (yet she is STILL jelous that we spend so much time together and are good friends....all because of her) Beth tells me again that Eve still thinks im obsessed and that shes still jelous.

I was bullied all through primary school and alot of highschool I HATE secrets and lies like all this, I want desperatley to talk to EVERYONE as a group, but Beth is too worried that everyone will hate her (she has this thing where everyone MUST like her, my problem is im very arrogant and dont bow down to people easily but when I do i get very upset and get picked on even more then normal which is why i just want to talk this out instead of losing my best friends) But i dont want Beth to feel betrayed by me for talking to Eve and Ellie (which she refused to tell as "it doesnt concern her" even tho she is as much as the group as myself, beth or ellie)

WHAT CAN I DO?
I dont want to have a fight, or be hated by my friends and I dont want to lose any of them because I go into depression like i have before.

Im terribly sorry for the long story, but the backstory I think is important.
   
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Re: My friends and me all tell secrets about each other to each other! - December 3rd 2011, 12:41 AM

I think sitting down as a group and discussing all of your concerns would be best. Set ground rules (no one should raise their voice, everyone has a chance to explain themselves and how they're feeling), then go over the series of events that led to this problem. Don't point the finger at anyone - focus on how YOU are feeling and what YOU want to accomplish by talking about the problem (clearing the air with all your friends, avoiding rumors/gossiping if possible).

If you can't seem to arrange a group discussion, talk to everyone individually. Be calm, be honest, and hope for the best.






   
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