Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!

Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

Closed Thread
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rate Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Horsefeathers. Offline
Remember your virtue.
TeenHelp Addict
Horsefeathers.'s Avatar
Name: Charlie
Gender: Absent

Posts: 9,295
Blog Entries: 81
Join Date: September 20th 2009

And so this is Christmas. - November 27th 2011, 10:56 PM

I don't like Christmas. Not in a 'bah humbug' kind of way, just in an 'I wish things were different' kind of way.

See, I like the lead-up to Christmas - putting up the tree, decorating it, hanging up lights. And I like Christmas morning - opening presents and having a lazy breakfast with my mum, dad, and sister. But the rest of Christmas is never fun. We spend half of it in a car, travelling to the city to visit our relatives - who we don't really get along with anyway. I've made it very clear I don't like this tradition, and my sister agrees that we only do it due to family politics and not any real desire to.

But we've been doing this for years, and it's clear that it's not going to change. We used to alternate, sometimes having Christmas lunch down here, but for the past five years or so, it's always us travelling, and them hosting the meal. And slowly they've invited more people, so now it's us, them, their extended family, and a lot of people I don't know. So, long story short, I really don't want to go - this year or any other.

I've agreed to go this year, but when I asked my mother if I'd have to keep going once I moved out and become independent and all that, she said it would 'probably be a good idea'. Call me crazy, but I'd like to have Christmas as something I actually enjoy, not dread. I want to spend it with people I care about, not people I'm obligated to spend time with every year.

So my questions are this. Do you think I'm being selfish, not wanting to go to thsee gatherings? And if you don't, do you have any ideas about how I can convince my mother to let me not go to them?

throw yourself into the unknown
with pace & a fury defiant.

  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Stargazed. Offline
Outside, huh?
Stargazed.'s Avatar

Posts: 3,532
Join Date: October 3rd 2010

Re: And so this is Christmas. - November 27th 2011, 11:34 PM

Do you think I'm being selfish, not wanting to go to these gatherings?: No, I would feel the same way you do. Christmas is about enjoying time with your family and feeling comfortable. If you don't feel comfortable, there's nothing anyone can do about that and it's unfair that you have to continue going.

Do you have any ideas about how I can convince my mother to let me not go to them?: Tell her exactly how you feel. Make it a point that you'd rather not dread Christmas. You can either sit her down and explain this OR you can write a very detailed letter.

Good luck. I hope you end up enjoying your Christmas.
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
Outside, huh?
Chris's Avatar
Name: Chris
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Location: Illinios

Posts: 4,247
Blog Entries: 3
Join Date: November 28th 2011

Re: And so this is Christmas. - November 28th 2011, 07:18 AM

I think that you are not selfish for wanting to go to those parties. I like small family parties as well and am very shy and not the way I usally am when Im with a large group of people at a party. I think that you shoul dhave every right to say that you dont want to go and to try to talk to you mom.

However I do think that since you have been going down there for so many years that it wont change.

I dont think that there is much to say or do to convince your family to stay at your own house for xmas. Sorry :-/

I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
Closed Thread



Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

All material copyright 1998-2020, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints | Mobile

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.