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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Stargazed. Offline
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My cousin. - November 29th 2011, 12:07 AM

I hope this is in the right spot.

Here's the story:

Some random guy requested to be my friend on Facebook and I asked my mom if she knew him and it turned out this guy was my third or fourth cousin. Weird, huh? Well it gets weirder. He's in his 50's and he just messaged me and started telling me about his dating life. Ok, cool. But then he started going on about how he doesn't know what he wants and how he's been seeing a guy. He then proceeded to talk about his sex life with this guy IN DETAILS. He said he had no one else to talk to about being gay so I felt bad and I just listened. However, it got awkward when he asked me if I've ever been with a girl and if it was a family member. I wasn't gonna lie so I told him I have been with a girl but not in a while and he asked me to describe the experience. I just told him it was a friend and we hooked up.. Then he told me he had two secrets to tell me but I couldn't tell anyone because it's confidential and he trusts me. One was he had sex with a family member and another was he's been having sex with minors. I didn't ask him anymore about the family member thing because I'm family and I didn't wanna know. Then he told me he wasn't going to tell me because it was a cousin and I may know her. Uh, okay. THEN he said he had sex with his brother when he was 14 years old. I was completely fine talking to him about how he's gay and can't tell anyone but it kinda crossed the line telling me he had sex with his family members. I just don't feel comfortable talking to him anymore so I did what anyone would do and I told him that I had to get off the computer to go do laundry. He told me he loved me and to text him. I said I would but I am not. And thank all goodness he doesn't have my number. Ok, that was kinda a rant but I have some questions.

  • Would you delete/ block him from FB?
  • Would you tell your mom and/or another family member?
He's a pervert but I don't want him to feel bad if he was genuinely just trusting me and telling me things. I just feel completely awkward and I don't know what to do.
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girl94 Offline
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Re: My cousin. - November 29th 2011, 12:45 AM

Oh I'd hate to be in that position. It's so weird that he would just come up and talk to you about those things. Gosh, I'm not really sure, but you may need to give your mom the heads-up, defintely. Tell her what happened, if you feel uncomfortable the best thing would be to confide in a trusted adult. (If it were me I'd probably block him) Thankfully, I haven't been in such a position like that, but there's been some interesting people who would come talking to me about things But defintely, you need to let someone know.

~Only love letís us see normal things in an extraordinary way.~

Stay strong, and remember that relationships are like broken glass, sometimes itís better to leave it alone rather than try to put the pieces back together, and get hurt.

Hey, if anyone wants to talk, you can pm me, befriend me, leave a message!
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Incompris Offline
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Re: My cousin. - November 29th 2011, 01:11 AM

I would delete and block him, and show my dad all the messages he sent, only because I would not want him to be around my little cousins. I can take care of myself, but a 6 year old can't.

Don't let someone guilt you into keeping secrets like that, because they "trust" you. It's best to just tell on him, you just don't know who you would be hurting by keeping that secret. An adult having sex with minors is illegal and bad, period.

We were made to be courageous.

Everybody falls sometimes
Gotta find the strength to rise
From the ashes and make a new beginning
Anyone can feel the ache
You think itís more than you can take
But you're stronger, stronger than you know
Donít you give up now
The sun will soon be shining
You gotta face the clouds
To find the silver lining

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