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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
AmazonQueen Offline
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I hate them for who they made me. - December 3rd 2011, 07:01 PM

So don't get me wrong my parents still gave me life and I love them,
but I have all sorts of resentment/anger/hate towards them for no reason
I feel like I've been playing the reverse role all my life and I'm fucking sick of it
I don't feel like everyone ever really took care of me and now I fly off the handle
over my dad asking me to get him a glass of water. I'm so tired of taking care and doing things for them
It's frustrating to tears. It's so petty and pointless and I'm angry for pretty much no reason but I can't help it
Wish I could control it. I don't know why it's so bad or what to do. I don't want to talk to them anymore.
We've talked about the past but it never helps to talk about anything.
I feel like they made me this angry/hateful and resentful person I don't want to be and I'm working on it
But I just can't help it, it feels like it's who I am now.


The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows.
It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.
You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't how hard you hit; it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward.
How much you can take, and keep moving forward.
PM me if you need to talk about ANYTHING.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
RebelGirl Offline
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 3rd 2011, 11:28 PM

I know exactly how to u feel especially because I keep my feelings hidden and then I just explode and always end up getting myself in trouble!
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 4th 2011, 01:09 AM

No one decides who you are but you. If you're unhappy with your life, then change it. Simple as that.



Take me seriously.
I dare you.



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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 4th 2011, 05:41 AM

Unfortunately we cant go back and change our past. But you can control your future. Maybe if you seek some help from school counselors or someone of that nature that can worth with you towards forgiveness; 'cause thats the thing you need to learn most of all in this situation: Forgiveness towards your parents.

Best wishes,
Chris


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
AmazonQueen Offline
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 4th 2011, 04:18 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by chrisjackson911 View Post
Unfortunately we cant go back and change our past. But you can control your future. Maybe if you seek some help from school counselors or someone of that nature that can worth with you towards forgiveness; 'cause thats the thing you need to learn most of all in this situation: Forgiveness towards your parents.

Best wishes,
Chris
I forgave them a long time ago and I STILL feel this way I was okay for a while I don't know what happened to bring this all up again.

Our school Councillor is completely useless.


The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows.
It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.
You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't how hard you hit; it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward.
How much you can take, and keep moving forward.
PM me if you need to talk about ANYTHING.
   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
Chasers Offline
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 4th 2011, 06:02 PM

Hey Jess,

You sound me back when I found out my mother was a whore when I was a child. I resented her and I resented how she controlled my life for ten years and got me to hate my father and his whole family. She is still doing evil things to this day, but I look past it.

I see that you are 16 and well, I'm 22, living with out my mother's control and I can do what I want and speak to her when I wish. I know Mr. Gir said change it if you are unhappy with your life, but it isn't that simple at 16. I get that. I didn't see for who my mother really was until I was 18 almost 19 and moved out from her house. For now, what I best can tell you is to get involved with stuff that you like and keep your mind occupied rather than focusing on what happened in the past. Once you are able to support yourself and get it, then you can choose not to speak to them. I've tried having words with my mother, but she is impossible to get through. Right now she has control of my sister and I pray the day that she is free from her control.

To this day, I control my life and make my own decisions. My mother and I only speak on terms that is necessary and I don't extend my hand to her any further than necessary. She simply isn't worth my time.

Feel free to PM me if you have any questions, but I can tell you this, TeenHelp became my safe haven at your age. I even met my best friend on this site and we still talk today, after six years.

I hope some of this helped, but hang on, two more years and you can do it

~Chasers


So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain
-SuperChick


   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
AmazonQueen Offline
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 5th 2011, 04:10 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chasers View Post
Hey Jess,

You sound me back when I found out my mother was a whore when I was a child. I resented her and I resented how she controlled my life for ten years and got me to hate my father and his whole family. She is still doing evil things to this day, but I look past it.

I see that you are 16 and well, I'm 22, living with out my mother's control and I can do what I want and speak to her when I wish. I know Mr. Gir said change it if you are unhappy with your life, but it isn't that simple at 16. I get that. I didn't see for who my mother really was until I was 18 almost 19 and moved out from her house. For now, what I best can tell you is to get involved with stuff that you like and keep your mind occupied rather than focusing on what happened in the past. Once you are able to support yourself and get it, then you can choose not to speak to them. I've tried having words with my mother, but she is impossible to get through. Right now she has control of my sister and I pray the day that she is free from her control.

To this day, I control my life and make my own decisions. My mother and I only speak on terms that is necessary and I don't extend my hand to her any further than necessary. She simply isn't worth my time.

Feel free to PM me if you have any questions, but I can tell you this, TeenHelp became my safe haven at your age. I even met my best friend on this site and we still talk today, after six years.

I hope some of this helped, but hang on, two more years and you can do it

~Chasers
thats exactly how it is she wasnt that much of a whore really but she did turn me against my dad and his side of the family and still tries to this day...im trying to keep occupied but its very hard in a dead end town where i cant get a job


The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows.
It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.
You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't how hard you hit; it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward.
How much you can take, and keep moving forward.
PM me if you need to talk about ANYTHING.
   
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 5th 2011, 04:19 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AmazonQueen View Post

I forgave them a long time ago and I STILL feel this way I was okay for a while I don't know what happened to bring this all up again.

Our school Counselor is completely useless.
Well sorry to hear that your counselor is no good. Have you thought of maybe going to an out of school counselor? Or maybe a psychologist? If that doesn't work - There isn't much I can tell you. The last thing I would mention is keep a detailed diary or other type thing. I kept it my 8th grade year and wrote in it everyday, when I was going through alot - and it helped me so much!

Other than that, if you aren't able to do any of those things, you would just have to learn forgiveness on your own which will me hard - unfortunately in most cases people grow up angry at their parents, and there relationship never changes.

Best wishes,
Chris


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
  (#9 (permalink)) Old
AmazonQueen Offline
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 5th 2011, 04:17 PM

My dad has mentioned maybe i need to see a councellor or phychologist out side school but i dont want to it makes me feel defective or like theres something wrong with me...I hate that feeling theres always something wrong with me and dont most physcologist just tell you to tell them how you feel about everything?


The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows.
It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.
You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't how hard you hit; it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward.
How much you can take, and keep moving forward.
PM me if you need to talk about ANYTHING.
   
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 6th 2011, 10:22 PM

No most aren't like that - thats just the movies and books.

I have been to SEVERAL people and I have not have one ask me 'how did that make you feel?"

In most cases, they just talk to you - NATURALLY. They don't pry into you - you get to say what you want. They do ask questions, but not annoying ones. Ones that really get you thinking about the whole situation. Usually they will make you think from both sides about situations. It really does help if you like to open up and be verbal about things.


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
  (#11 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 7th 2011, 05:55 AM

It is not a man's circumstances that define him, nor his past. His actions make him who he is, not his hardships.

- Justin



"Buy it, use it, break it, fix it,
Trash it, change it, mail, upgrade it,
Charge it, point it, zoom it, press it,
Snap it, work it, quick, erase it,
Write it, cut it, paste it, save it,
Load it, check it, quick, rewrite it"
Technologic
   
  (#12 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 9th 2011, 06:45 PM

I hate my parents as well. They've never done anything wrong as such, lied to me about a few things, mostly always, little things. It made me lose my trust in them. To top it off, I hate being with them 'cause we always end up talking about studies and how everyone else is always performing better than me and that I should try harder. One thing about me is that I'm in love with music. Basically singing. I'd started my singing classes in July this year and they ended them in September or October. Because of absolutely stupid reasons, so it hurt like hell. I was looking forward to it. They were like, you should do Chemistry and Physics tuitions instead. All I'm saying here is, everyone's parents do stuff. I hate mine for always talking about my studies and future. They've restricted my going out with friends to quite an extent. Hurts like hell, and I have a short temper. It's all I can do to just walk off without saying anything. I stay out of my house the whole day and avoid conversation as much as I can. That's the only way I avoid any fights. I've mostly always had to rely on myself. Be with your friends and enjoy life is all that's left for me to say. You won't be suffering for long now. 2 years more.You're strong. You'll make it. have faith.
   
  (#13 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I hate them for who they made me. - December 9th 2011, 06:46 PM

performing better than me in studies*
   
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