TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
dani99 Offline
Ms.Average
Experienced TeenHelper
******
 
dani99's Avatar
 
Name: Danielle
Age: 23
Gender: Girly girl <3
Location: Down in the south

Posts: 513
Join Date: February 11th 2012

Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 13th 2012, 11:06 PM

On January 28th, my boyfriend and I were caught by the cops having sex in his car in a park that we believed to be...well...empty. Well, we can't see eachother until February 28th which I understand. My mom talked to me about everything and I couldn't believe the words that came out of her mouth.

She bad talked him so bad. Saying he wasn't a man because he didn't know how to do "simple" things like find out what was wrong with his car and all of that? You know why? Because when he was 9 his dad came out and claimed he was gay and then moved 5 hours away from where we live and hardly ever sees him. He only lives with his mom who is very depressed and never gets out and his younger sister who I am sure doesn't know much.

And my boyfriend is hurt that my mom said that because...he can't help that. He can't help it one bit, and it makes me mad that she'd say that. I want to confront her about it, but last time I did was during the arugement and she told me I had no way of winning it. How do I make her see that what she said was absolutely uncalled for?


Just a girl with an angel above, just a girl with an angel to love. My angel grew wings and she did dare to fly. But I promise my angel, it's only good night but never good-bye. My angel, my angel in heaven above. My angel, my darling, you'll always have my love. Rest in peace, my sweet darling, it's only temporary that we part. My angel, my angel, how you still do steal my heart </3


   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Kate* Online
Newsletter Tips Writer
Outside, huh?
**********
 
Kate*'s Avatar
 
Name: Katie
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Location: Ohio

Posts: 4,647
Join Date: January 6th 2009

Re: Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 13th 2012, 11:22 PM

If it were me I think i would just let it go given the circumstances in which it was said. This guy was caught by the police having sex with her 16 year old daughter, I'm guessing that's where the anger is coming from. There's also a good chance that she believes that no guy will ever be good enough for you, let alone someone who would wind up in this situation. Once she started in on all the things that she thought was wrong with him, it was hard to stop and she said some very innapropriate things about him. If you really want to bring it up with her, do it once everything calms down and if she starts arguing or raising her voice back off to avoid an argument.


Member Since: September 19, 2007
LHO: March 31, 2008- October 13, 2012

"Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you." Jean Paul Sarte
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
dani99 Offline
Ms.Average
Experienced TeenHelper
******
 
dani99's Avatar
 
Name: Danielle
Age: 23
Gender: Girly girl <3
Location: Down in the south

Posts: 513
Join Date: February 11th 2012

Re: Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 13th 2012, 11:44 PM

I get she was mad but I don't think she should have brought that up. After all, it's not his fault that his dad left and he has nobody to show him anything. The argument was several days ago, but I'm still very upset about what she said. I know she has every right being mad about having sex, but I really don't understand why she felt the need to bring up something so sensitive. Angry or not, she should know how to control it and not let it get out of hand.

I just don't want to sit back and tolerate her talking about someone I love so much. :/ Because I do love him a lot and regardless of the fact that yeah she cares about me and yeah she's mad that he had sex with her daughter, he's also done some amazing things for me that most guys haven't done and she should respect that much.


Just a girl with an angel above, just a girl with an angel to love. My angel grew wings and she did dare to fly. But I promise my angel, it's only good night but never good-bye. My angel, my angel in heaven above. My angel, my darling, you'll always have my love. Rest in peace, my sweet darling, it's only temporary that we part. My angel, my angel, how you still do steal my heart </3


   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
Member
Outside, huh?
**********
 
Chris's Avatar
 
Name: Chris
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Illinios

Posts: 4,247
Blog Entries: 3
Join Date: November 28th 2011

Re: Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 14th 2012, 02:02 AM

Well I'm going to have to agree with Kate: I wouldn't confront your mom about this.

But, If you feel it necessary to confront her, then be prepared for the consequences. Would you rather let it go, or get punished more? Thats the real question you need to ask yourself. If you think that you still want to confront her, then tell her that you told your boyfriend what she said he and is totally destroyed and hurt by it. Tell her that she hurt his feelings and hurt your feelings as well. Hopefully she will realize how words hurt, but you also have to come to realize that she might now realize how words hurt. Maybe she wont care? And if thats the case, then there isn't many things you can do to change her outlook on things.




Best wishes,
Chris


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
dani99 Offline
Ms.Average
Experienced TeenHelper
******
 
dani99's Avatar
 
Name: Danielle
Age: 23
Gender: Girly girl <3
Location: Down in the south

Posts: 513
Join Date: February 11th 2012

Re: Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 14th 2012, 02:45 AM

I know I might get in trouble for asking, but the thing is....this isn't the /first/ time she's done it and it's really starting to upset me that it's been a multiple offense.


Just a girl with an angel above, just a girl with an angel to love. My angel grew wings and she did dare to fly. But I promise my angel, it's only good night but never good-bye. My angel, my angel in heaven above. My angel, my darling, you'll always have my love. Rest in peace, my sweet darling, it's only temporary that we part. My angel, my angel, how you still do steal my heart </3


   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
Member
Outside, huh?
**********
 
Chris's Avatar
 
Name: Chris
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Illinios

Posts: 4,247
Blog Entries: 3
Join Date: November 28th 2011

Re: Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 14th 2012, 03:12 AM

If you feel it best, then mention it to her. You just have to be willing to face the outcome of the fight no matter what it is.

Personally, I'm not a psychic or anything, but I think you will talk to her, and then you guys will get in a fight, and she still will go back to doing the same thing. So I personally don't think that you talking to her will improve much, because she already seems set in her ways and she frankly doesn't seem like she cares about hurting yours, or anyone else's feelings (especially when she is angry/upset).


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
dani99 Offline
Ms.Average
Experienced TeenHelper
******
 
dani99's Avatar
 
Name: Danielle
Age: 23
Gender: Girly girl <3
Location: Down in the south

Posts: 513
Join Date: February 11th 2012

Re: Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 15th 2012, 12:47 AM

It's worth a shot because I think she was just mad in the time being I guess. The time she mentioned it before was when she said he wasn't the guy she would have picked for me but in his defense, she did understand that his dad left when he was at a very young age. I'll talk to her most likely and if she doesn't agree...well, we'll all know who the more mature person it. I hate to say my mom is immature, but....


Just a girl with an angel above, just a girl with an angel to love. My angel grew wings and she did dare to fly. But I promise my angel, it's only good night but never good-bye. My angel, my angel in heaven above. My angel, my darling, you'll always have my love. Rest in peace, my sweet darling, it's only temporary that we part. My angel, my angel, how you still do steal my heart </3


   
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
Member
Outside, huh?
**********
 
Chris's Avatar
 
Name: Chris
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Illinios

Posts: 4,247
Blog Entries: 3
Join Date: November 28th 2011

Re: Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 15th 2012, 01:02 AM

Yeah, might as well try it. I don't think it can hurt the situation any worse.

I wish you the best of luck! Feel free to keep me updated after you talk to her!


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
  (#9 (permalink)) Old
Member
Average Joe
***
 
☪ ERIN JUDE ☪'s Avatar
 
Name: Erin Jude
Gender: Female
Location: east coast

Posts: 114
Blog Entries: 28
Join Date: August 21st 2011

Re: Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 15th 2012, 01:22 AM

IN MY OPINION, SHE'S JUST BEING A MOM. MY GRANDMA WOULD ACT THE SAME WAY. I CAN UNDERSTAND HER POINT OF VIEW.


"May I remind you of those little things. The small gems of life. Those little sparkles of happiness in which we find solace in. At times they're hard to see but just know they're always there, just waiting for you to reach out, see them, to embrace them and to enjoy them."
  Send a message via Skype™ to ☪ ERIN JUDE ☪ 
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
dani99 Offline
Ms.Average
Experienced TeenHelper
******
 
dani99's Avatar
 
Name: Danielle
Age: 23
Gender: Girly girl <3
Location: Down in the south

Posts: 513
Join Date: February 11th 2012

Re: Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 16th 2012, 02:13 AM

Being upset over the situation and blaming him for not being able to do things when it's not his fault anyways because his dad came out as gay and left his family when he was only 8 are two different things. She had every right to be mad about the situation, but not totally blame him for the other things that were irrelevant to the situation.

I did talk to her, and she said that she understood that what she said was a little out of line and she doesn't judge him for that, but she does judge him based on what happened and I get that. And she'll try not to do it again she said.


Just a girl with an angel above, just a girl with an angel to love. My angel grew wings and she did dare to fly. But I promise my angel, it's only good night but never good-bye. My angel, my angel in heaven above. My angel, my darling, you'll always have my love. Rest in peace, my sweet darling, it's only temporary that we part. My angel, my angel, how you still do steal my heart </3


   
  (#11 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
Member
Outside, huh?
**********
 
Chris's Avatar
 
Name: Chris
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Illinios

Posts: 4,247
Blog Entries: 3
Join Date: November 28th 2011

Re: Why does my mom have to be so rude to my boyfriend? - February 16th 2012, 03:41 AM

I'm glad to hear that! Was it the outcome you were looking for? Did it go better than expected, or worse?


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
boyfriend, mom, rude

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.