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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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Temperance Offline
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Unhappy Just one more day... I miss her :'( - February 22nd 2013, 06:03 AM

It's been 7 months today since I had to have my childhood pet put to 'sleep'. I know a lot of people would say, "It's just a dog, get over it" but she was my best friend and I grew up with her. She was always there when I needed her. She was a pillow when i was watching TV as a kid, she was my shoulder to cry on when I'd had a bad day at school, and when my grandpa died when I was 16, she was my reason to keep living. We got her when I was 5, and she was 16 1/2 to the day when I had to make the decision (yes, my parents made me choose and made me go to the vet by myself) and I still cry myself to sleep almost every night. I miss her so much and I've been to a grief counselor but I swear she thinks i'm crazy :s


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Re: Just one more day... I miss her :'( - February 22nd 2013, 09:38 PM

Hey there J.C

First off I'm sorry that your dog had to be put down. I know how hard it is to loose a pet you grew up with. About 13 years ago my family's pet dog was put down. At 1st I coped pretty well with it but then when it hit me I struggled hard. You'll pull through this, and remember you still have all the memories that you shared with her. If you ever need anyone to talk too feel free to message me and I'll do my best!
   
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Re: Just one more day... I miss her :'( - February 22nd 2013, 10:26 PM

Hey JC, I'm sorry for your loss.
In 4th grade, we had to put down one of our family dogs. She was 17-20 years old [my mother had gotten her when she was a stray], and she's been with my parents long before I was born. It was really hard, she had been there with me my whole life. What really helped me was naming a stuffed animal that looked like her, after her [her name was Rigby], and when I was sad, I'd hug it tightly, as if it was actually her. I'd talk to it, tell all my secrets to it. Keep in mind, I was nine years old when I did this. If it's something that you'd be interested in, go ahead, it really helps.
Again, sorry to hear what happened.


"Don't tell me you're not beautiful. You're the kind of beautiful the blind would see if we could figure out some way to give them three seconds of sight." -- Shane Koyczan

Last edited by Broken Constellation; February 22nd 2013 at 10:33 PM.
   
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Re: Just one more day... I miss her :'( - February 22nd 2013, 11:42 PM

Hey there,

I know how hard it is to lose a pet. I've lost quite a few in my lifetime, and it's a terrible loss. Like the others said, remember how she helped you through all of these years. Remember that she was your best friend, and nothing will take that away. Even if she's gone, you have the memories and the love you felt for her.

I really like Mads idea about the stuffed animal. It might help you! Along with that, writing about or TO her might really help you cope with the grief. It's okay to be upset. It takes time to move past something like this.

I'm around if you want to talk. Take care.


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-EAP-

   
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Re: Just one more day... I miss her :'( - February 23rd 2013, 05:23 AM

I'm sorry for your loss, and I kind of know what you are going through. When I was born, two weeks later my family got a German Shepard (who was about 3 months old). So we basically grew up together, and then when I was 12, I woke up and noticed my dog staring at me, and I called him over and he didn't move; he had passed on (while staring at me). I was scared, but at the same time had an overwhelming sense of protection and calmness knowing that he is watching over me. Call me crazy, but sometimes I think about him even though it was 6-7 years ago. And sometimes, I even tear up. The point is, sometimes our pets ARE like part of the family, so don't feel 'crazy' or not 'normal'.

It will be a bit of a process, and defiantly alot of grieving will take place. I am, however, glad you have a counselor to help you through this. If you ever need to talk, feel free to PM me.


Best wishes,
Chris


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Re: Just one more day... I miss her :'( - February 23rd 2013, 05:39 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris. View Post
I'm sorry for your loss, and I kind of know what you are going through. When I was born, two weeks later my family got a German Shepard (who was about 3 months old). So we basically grew up together, and then when I was 12, I woke up and noticed my dog staring at me, and I called him over and he didn't move; he had passed on (while staring at me). I was scared, but at the same time had an overwhelming sense of protection and calmness knowing that he is watching over me. Call me crazy, but sometimes I think about him even though it was 6-7 years ago. And sometimes, I even tear up. The point is, sometimes our pets ARE like part of the family, so don't feel 'crazy' or not 'normal'.

It will be a bit of a process, and defiantly alot of grieving will take place. I am, however, glad you have a counselor to help you through this. If you ever need to talk, feel free to PM me.


Best wishes,
Chris

Just reading your post made me cry, I did end up getting a tattoo in memory of her as a way to help with the grieving process. But I wish i could have one more day to spend with her by my side Don't think I'm insane but sometimes late at night I can feel her at the foot of my bed and it helps me calm down. I know she's still here with me and I know she's only here because I can't let go of her just yet and she knows it :s


~We're all misfits living in a world on fire~


Butterfly, don't fly away on me yet



   
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Re: Just one more day... I miss her :'( - February 23rd 2013, 06:03 AM

No one thinks your insane. I sometimes think I feel that my old dog is watching over me too, sometimes I swear I even hear him. Like I said, it's not easy to just move on from a passing family member (because that's what she is, a family member). It takes alot of time, and alot of grieving (not to mention alot of courage).

Just don't forget to take care of yourself, and like I said earlier, I'm glad you are talking to someone (even if you think she portrays you as being crazy, which I bet she doesn't). Stay strong.


Best wishes,
Chris


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
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Re: Just one more day... I miss her :'( - February 25th 2013, 01:13 AM

No one thinks you are insane, no one reading this thread, and your grief counselor doesn't think you are. We realize you are grieving, and that is 100% okay. Your dog was not only part of your family, but also your friend, so you in a way are trying to cope with the loss of a friend and a family member at the same time, which isn't easy, even coping with each individually. Take your time though, grieving is a process and there is no rush, I lost my best friend almost 2 years ago, and I'm still grieving, and I know it's okay. It's okay for you to be grieving as well. We are all here for you


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