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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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sillystring Offline
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Idk what to do - January 4th 2014, 05:21 AM

On dec 16th my dad passed away in his sleep. Dec 18th I had to put my best friend down. This is two years after my mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. I'm moving back home to take care of her but that is causing me to lose my dream job. Also with dealing with the funeral I didn't get paid for those weeks now I have 25$ in my bank account and over $1000 in bills. Idk what to do please if anyone has any idea please let me know. I have an older brother but he won't help. I'm so lost
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Chris Offline
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Re: Idk what to do - January 4th 2014, 07:43 AM

Hi, there.

I'm so very sorry to hear about both the losses you have endured, and the situations you've had to deal with the past few weeks. I do want to say that you're an extremely good daughter, which was willing to drop her dream job to go home and take care of her mother. Family is everything, and sometimes we have to do whatever we can to take care of each other.

The best piece of advice I can provide you is to take one thing at a time. While I understand that everything seems to be falling apart and/or hitting you in the face all at once, trying to take on everything will only result in further issues, and failure. Your best bet is to take on one task at a time. So, begin to provide assistance to your mother. Do what you need to do to care for her. Once you feel that things are ok (i.e., you're handling the new environment in a healthy way, your mother is stable, etc), try to look for a part time job (or full time job if you think you can manage it along with taking care of your mother). Sure, the bills may be late, but you have to prioritize.

So make a list like the following: family first, then bills (i.e., finding income), then social life, etc, and begin to do what you have to do for both your family, and yourself.

Best wishes,

I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
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Re: Idk what to do - January 4th 2014, 08:31 PM

I'm so sorry for your losses.
It's never easy to just walk away from things you love,but your doing the right thing. And your dream job will always be there.

Chris is right, family first, and so on. While dealing with it all at once you do need an income of some sort, part time, sence your taking care of your mom you could live there making it more easy for you and less cost.

I hope you'll be okay and remember it won't be hard forever.
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