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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Unhappy He has a day....but I don't feel sad - May 3rd 2009, 08:57 AM

So I found out this morning my grandpa has been taken to hospital. He will die today or mabey tommorrow. He's been in pain a lot so it's not surprising, but I'm not allowed to see him. I strange I don't feel sad, just sort of empty. I think I miss my pets more. Is this normal? I think when he passes away I'll cry but only because I have to. If this was a pet I'd be in tears now. I want to be sad, I want to miss him. I just can't even if I try. Is there any way this feeling will stop? Has this happened to anyone else??


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Re: He has a day.... - May 5th 2009, 04:07 PM

you might just be kinda numb.... when my grandma died, i didn't feel anything until the funeral (at which point i sobbed and hiccuped like no other). I think about her a lot, even though she died 5 or 6 years ago.
nothing's wrong with you, hun.... your just in the first stage of grief, denial.

OR if thats not the case.... were you close to him? like did y'all ever have conversations or hang out or anything? if you weren't close to him, than it's normal for you not to be very upset.

*hug*

pm me any time, ok hun?



PM me any time, ok? I'm always here to help.



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Re: He has a day.... - May 5th 2009, 04:28 PM

Hey there. (:

First of all, I'm really sorry to hear about your grandpa. Family deaths are always so difficult, but you can get through this. Everything happens for a reason, and I'm sure part of you would prefer for you grandpa not to be in pain anymore, even if it means he has to leave you.The thing is, there's no right or wrong way to grieve. There are no set rules when it comes to dealing with a death. Everybody deals with death in their own way, and whatever way you chose to grieve, is the right way.

My Grandfather, who was like a father to me, died from cancer when I was 12 years old. Everybody around me was devastated and crying and I just didn't feel anything. I felt like nothing had happened, so you can see you're not the only person who experiences this. But come the day of the funeral, it just hit me and I bawled my eyes out. Whatever happens for you, is normal for you.

Death always takes a while to sink in. It may be in a few days, a few weeks, a few months. Everybody is different. Don't rush any feelings and don't feel like there is something wrong with you. Deal with it in your way, and whatever way that is, is perfectly okay. PM me if you ever need to talk. My thoughts are with your family. Take care of yourself.
   
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Re: He has a day.... - May 5th 2009, 08:16 PM

Hey,

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandpa. The loss of a loved one is never easy, and we all react in very different ways. You said you're not sure you can cry, but that you feel empty. I think that, maybe, this is just how you're coping with the pending loss of your grandpa.

There's no way to prepare for the loss of someone we love, whether it be a pet, family member, or friend. You may or may not cry when you lose your grandpa--remember that there is no right or wrong way to grieve.

Spending time with your family right now may be helpful to you. Hopefully it will help to be with others who understand what you're feeling and can support you, during this difficult time. Don't hesitate to let me know if you need anything.

Take care of yourself. We're always here for you.



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