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Hypothetical questions - October 9th 2014, 08:42 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Let's say one of your family members or friends commit suicide and it is a total shock to you. You have the funeral and then try to get life back to normal. How would you react if some online stranger suddenly showed up and offered to tell you about how that person spent their last days?

Switch viewpoints now. If you had this information, would you feel like you owe it to them to come forward with the info? If so, when would be the most appropriate timing? Or would you think it's best to just not say anything? Would you do it if you felt like you would be blamed for not taking action?
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Re: Hypothetical questions - October 9th 2014, 09:29 PM

The first one : I'd listen, however I would took the information with dose of distrust and distance. For obvious reasons, people talk a lot of things, and not most of them have anything related to the truth.

The second one : I'd tell it to the closest ones only, those known to my personal knowledge. I think they'd deserve to know.

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Re: Hypothetical questions - October 10th 2014, 12:13 AM

I would definitely listen to what the person had to say but I would want to know how they met and how long they knew each other. Since this person would be a stranger yet somehow have the knowledge of my existence and situation I would believe them to some extent.

It depends on what exactly the information is and how detailed it is. If it's too gruesome or upsetting I wouldn't tell the family because I would want them to start healing. If it's something they would benefit from knowing I would tell them. As for the timing I don't think there is any 'right' time for this sort of news. I'm assuming you meant if I were blamed for knowing the person was in a bad place? Although it is nice to help people (and I probably would have helped the person earlier) there is only so much that can be done and in the end, suicide is a choice. It would probably bother me to an extent but I would just reassure myself that it wasn't my fault.

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Re: Hypothetical questions - October 10th 2014, 03:04 PM

I think I would listen, but I wouldn't be too trusting of the information. I would want to know how they knew the person and things like that.

If I had information, I may or may not come forward with it. Honestly, it depends on what type of information it is. If it is something I feel like the family should really know, I would probably try to tell them. It sounds like I would be somewhat guilty in this circumstance, so I would want to find someone to talk to about it, even if I felt I couldn't tell those who knew the person. I don't think there is much of an appropriate timing for this. Not too early, but not too late is what I would aim for. If I felt guilty for not taking action, I might share the information, but if I thought it wasn't appropriate for the family to know, I would find a counselor of some sort to talk to.

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Re: Hypothetical questions - October 14th 2014, 10:10 AM

I think that, being shocked by death, I would not be able to resist a person who was offering me more information that might help me understand. I'd take their words with a grain of salt, because they have no credibility with me, being a stranger and all.

I agree with Lucent. It depends on the information. But I think that, unless it was something really big and obvious that would not harm anyone too much directly, I would not say anything. I can't be sure that the things I witnessed are the real reasons for their suicide, and I would not want to provide a grieving family with false information that cannot bring their loved one back.
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