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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
silversun Offline
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Unhappy I'm sad for her.... - May 9th 2009, 11:39 PM

Okay, so my best friend's dad died on Wednesday. She won't talk to me, and she hasn't been to school!

Love you-- Kayla c:

Feel free to PM me if you need anything or have any questions :-)

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eunoia Offline
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Re: I'm sad for her.... - May 10th 2009, 01:21 AM

Hey there, Kayla.

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend's loss. Losing a parent is one of the most difficult things many of us go through, in life, I think. It's heartbreaking that she is having to experience this, so young.

I understand your concern for her--and that just goes to show what a great person you are. But everyone grieves differently, and maybe your friend just needs her space and some time alone.

Try letting her know that you are there for her, always, and will be waiting when she's ready to talk, but don't try to force her into opening up. When she is ready and the time comes, she'll talk about her loss. Until then try to understand that it isn't that she doesn't want to talk to YOU, but that she is only trying to make sense of life without her father.

Take care of yourself, Kayla.

Someday I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us.
I told you to be patient
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Re: I'm sad for her.... - May 10th 2009, 01:52 AM

she just needs sum ruum it is just vary hard for her but i think that u shud go over and see if u can chere her up.

my frend lost his dad and it wus hard for us both becus he wus a father to both of us so we just had to help echother thru so u shud help your frend get thru it
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Re: I'm sad for her.... - May 10th 2009, 02:06 AM

Aw sorry to hear this..
I knew a girl (not very well though) and her dad died, it happened in March and she wasnt back in school until the next year, so in September.
She had to come for exams and such, but thats all.
She was given the rest off. Its understandable she wont talk to people too.

Im not in a great mood and I havent spoken to my friends all day and Im not going through something half as bad, some people just like to have there own space to themselves to grieve

Dont worry, she will be fine hopefully!!!!
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Re: I'm sad for her.... - May 21st 2009, 01:10 AM

Hi, Kayla.
I'm really sorry to hear about your friend's dad
There are definitely no words to convey the loss f a loved one, epecially a parent. It really is natural for people to iss school or work after they've eperienced something like that. Its really sweet that you're so concerned for your friend, and she's very lucky to have a friend like you (:
There's really nothing that anyone can do to fix something ike the loss of a loved one, but the best thing tht you can do is to let her know wht you're there for her, and will always be there if she needs someone to talk to, or even to just be on the phone with, you know? She may not be ready to talk about it, but it'll mean a lot for her to know that you're there. And, everyone comes to terms in their own time; she might not be ready to talk for quite a while; just be patient with here and let her know that you're there. Maybe call her from time to time to ask how she is and if she needs anything. I'm sure that would mean a lot to her.
And, sometimes its really enough just to listen; you dont always have to have something to say. Often times, when it comes to grieving, there's nothing to say. But again, I think that she's really very lucky to have a friend like you.



PM anytime (: ................ ☮ ♥ ♪ ♫ la la di da : )
i am beautiful because that's how i see myself.
talented, because i have confidence in what i do.
scarred because at times, i couldn't take it.
strong, because one day, i chose to be.
loveable because i've learned to love myself.
and also because, same as everyone else,
i was born that way.
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Re: I'm sad for her.... - May 23rd 2009, 06:28 AM

Hey Kayla,

I am so sorry that your friend is going through such a hard time right now. When people go through something that painful they sometimes need a while sort through their feelings by themselves. I know when I lost my dad I was such a wreck I didn't want anyone to see me. Just remind her that you care about her and are there for her but respect her need for space. Forcing her to hang out is just going to make her feel bad. However, if her isolation continues it might be a good idea to voice your concern and gently encourage her to get out of the house. It's important to try and understand what she is going through and bear with her while she grieves. Becoming impatient with her or upset because he isn't acting like herself is only going to make her feel more isolated. Another thing you might want to consider is suggesting she go to therapy to help her through this hard time. Make sure she knows you aren't trying to insult her by telling her she need professional help but rather you just want to make sure everything possible is being done to make this easier for her. If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to PM me. I wish you the best of luck in helping your friend. Take care and best wishes.

Lots of love <3 Mimi

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Re: I'm sad for her.... - May 27th 2009, 10:39 PM

I'm sorry to hear about your friend's loss. My dad was killed three years ago. Right now all you can do is tell her that you are there for her if she needs anything. I know that I didn't want to talk to anyone right after my dad died either... Just give her some space.
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