TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Catlady Offline
Member
Junior TeenHelper
****
 
Catlady's Avatar
 
Age: 19
Gender: Other
Location: USA

Posts: 243
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: November 17th 2015

Question I'm so confused.. - November 25th 2015, 06:07 AM

Hi. I didn't know where to put this.. So I just put it here.. Might go in mental health, so sorry if I offend anyone by putting this here! Feel free to move it wherever! So. I've never thought about death recently just when I was like 8.. I would cry myself to sleep scared of death. And this is coming back.. Like why now? I am trying to go to sleep, and I'm freaking scared! I am terrifyed that I will die. I have so many questions! Like what happens after I die. I am a Christian so I have to believe in Heaven and Hell.. But I just don't know!! Does it hurt, will I know when, do I see a "light"? What happens when I'm dead? Like I have so many questions and they're terrifying me! So say I live a good 90 years. What then? Say I go to heaven? For how long? Like it doesn't make sense!! I am getting so upset because it's just freaking me out. I know I shouldn't be thinking about this and living my life.. But still it's scary! I just really need some calming words because I am so scared right now. I can't sleep and I'm just terrified. I haven't been like this since I was 8 right after a funeral! I really hope someone can help me! I also feel like I am letting my Christian faith down by questioning what happens in the after life. Ugh, I'm just so confused! Please help!


Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future. ~Oscar Wilde.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
iambatman Offline
Suicidal? Yes.
Average Joe
***
 
iambatman's Avatar
 
Name: Riley
Age: 18
Gender: Female or Male? Yes.
Location: Hell

Posts: 159
Blog Entries: 26
Join Date: October 26th 2015

Re: I'm so confused.. - November 27th 2015, 04:20 PM

I wouldn't know how to answer this. I am constantly thinking about what death feels like and if I will go to Hell because I don't believe there is a "Heaven". I was Catholic but I gave it up when I turned 13. I don't think you are letting your faith down by questioning death. It is natural to think about it. Also, if there is a Heaven you would stay there for and eternity. Same as if you were to go to Hell. But I think if you stay with your faith you will go wherever you believe you will go. I am a self proclaimed Satanist so I think I will more than likely go to Hell. Also, if you ask "God" for forgiveness he will probably allow you into Heaven. I don't know this though. But if you think you are going to die, you should do a confession. (If your church offers confessions) Because when I was still a catholic I thought I was going to die so I asked for forgiveness and I did a confession. I almost died by overdosing and when I was between life and death I did see a "light" but it was taken away too quickly because the doctors had brought me "back to life". I did see some of my family members that died...But I don't know. Perhaps it is different for everyone...Sorry if this didn't help you.


That god does not exist, I cannot deny
That my whole being cries out for a god, I cannot forget.


The gates of Heaven were locked shut. The pits of Hell, they were all filled up. And I fear I don't belong here.....

How could someone so perfect feel so insecure? As to scar her skin with cuts and burns and still want to hurt more. How does someone so loving learn to hate her own guts? Drawing a picture on her arm with a blade, as if her mind wasn't dark enough
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Catlady Offline
Member
Junior TeenHelper
****
 
Catlady's Avatar
 
Age: 19
Gender: Other
Location: USA

Posts: 243
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: November 17th 2015

Re: I'm so confused.. - November 27th 2015, 06:18 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by iambatman View Post
I wouldn't know how to answer this. I am constantly thinking about what death feels like and if I will go to Hell because I don't believe there is a "Heaven". I was Catholic but I gave it up when I turned 13. I don't think you are letting your faith down by questioning death. It is natural to think about it. Also, if there is a Heaven you would stay there for and eternity. Same as if you were to go to Hell. But I think if you stay with your faith you will go wherever you believe you will go. I am a self proclaimed Satanist so I think I will more than likely go to Hell. Also, if you ask "God" for forgiveness he will probably allow you into Heaven. I don't know this though. But if you think you are going to die, you should do a confession. (If your church offers confessions) Because when I was still a catholic I thought I was going to die so I asked for forgiveness and I did a confession. I almost died by overdosing and when I was between life and death I did see a "light" but it was taken away too quickly because the doctors had brought me "back to life". I did see some of my family members that died...But I don't know. Perhaps it is different for everyone...Sorry if this didn't help you.
I'm sorry that you had a reason to leave your faith. I was Catholic but converted to just Christianity a couple years ago.. I hate the Catholic Church everyone is freaking rude! I really wish I could help you with your faith. But I know we all believe in different things. I do not think you will go to Hell. Anyways! It did help. Thank you. I just overthink EVERYTHING but I just need to calm down and live my life!! UGH, I wish all these thoughts would just go away Thanks though, it did help.


Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future. ~Oscar Wilde.
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
iambatman Offline
Suicidal? Yes.
Average Joe
***
 
iambatman's Avatar
 
Name: Riley
Age: 18
Gender: Female or Male? Yes.
Location: Hell

Posts: 159
Blog Entries: 26
Join Date: October 26th 2015

Re: I'm so confused.. - November 27th 2015, 07:06 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by lonely_cat_lady View Post
I'm sorry that you had a reason to leave your faith. I was Catholic but converted to just Christianity a couple years ago.. I hate the Catholic Church everyone is freaking rude! I really wish I could help you with your faith. But I know we all believe in different things. I do not think you will go to Hell. Anyways! It did help. Thank you. I just overthink EVERYTHING but I just need to calm down and live my life!! UGH, I wish all these thoughts would just go away Thanks though, it did help.
Okay........You're so very welcome


That god does not exist, I cannot deny
That my whole being cries out for a god, I cannot forget.


The gates of Heaven were locked shut. The pits of Hell, they were all filled up. And I fear I don't belong here.....

How could someone so perfect feel so insecure? As to scar her skin with cuts and burns and still want to hurt more. How does someone so loving learn to hate her own guts? Drawing a picture on her arm with a blade, as if her mind wasn't dark enough
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Celyn Offline
~One Skittles Minion~

Jeez, get a life!
***********
 
Celyn's Avatar
 
Name: Holly
Age: 26
Gender: Female
Location: Wales

Posts: 5,489
Blog Entries: 151
Join Date: June 16th 2009

Re: I'm so confused.. - November 27th 2015, 10:07 PM

Hey there,

Is there anything that might have triggered these feelings? Since my dad died, I have felt the same way- I often have thoughts about death in general, and it scares me! I find that when I am stressed, the thoughts seem to be worse.

Nobody knows the answer to any of those things, but I'm very sure that many people all around the world, have the same questions. Even though you have been brought up to be Christian, you are not letting your Christian faith down by questioning these things- that's very normal! Do you have a religious leader that you could talk to about these things? Perhaps they might be able to shed some light. If you feel that Christianity just isn't for you anymore, that's ok too!

You are definitely right about living your life and not dwelling on these worries, but I understand that it can be hard. It also sounds like the funeral you attended when you were 8, upset you quite a bit. It might help to talk to a grief counsellor about these things, so that you can spend less time worrying about death in general.

Take care


HelpLINK and Live Help Officer
Feel free to PM me! Even if I canít help, Iím always going to listen <3
SKITTLIFY!

   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
Catlady Offline
Member
Junior TeenHelper
****
 
Catlady's Avatar
 
Age: 19
Gender: Other
Location: USA

Posts: 243
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: November 17th 2015

Re: I'm so confused.. - November 28th 2015, 01:16 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by DutchWelshWolf View Post
Hey there,

Is there anything that might have triggered these feelings? Since my dad died, I have felt the same way- I often have thoughts about death in general, and it scares me! I find that when I am stressed, the thoughts seem to be worse.

Nobody knows the answer to any of those things, but I'm very sure that many people all around the world, have the same questions. Even though you have been brought up to be Christian, you are not letting your Christian faith down by questioning these things- that's very normal! Do you have a religious leader that you could talk to about these things? Perhaps they might be able to shed some light. If you feel that Christianity just isn't for you anymore, that's ok too!

You are definitely right about living your life and not dwelling on these worries, but I understand that it can be hard. It also sounds like the funeral you attended when you were 8, upset you quite a bit. It might help to talk to a grief counsellor about these things, so that you can spend less time worrying about death in general.

Take care
I think maybe my suicide attempt might have triggered it.. Because I was thinking about what if I had succeeded.. I just feel so confused about everything. Like I know Christianity is the faith I am destined to be in. I know that for sure. I just have so many questions that no one can answer. Which is scary! The fear of the unknown. It does make me feel better that someone else feels this way. My youngest sister came to me the other day scared of death also. And I wasn't able to answer any questions. It made me so angry because like I want to help her! I think this has a lot to do with my overthinking issues. Thank you so much! Also, I'm sorry to hear about your dad, I know that must have been really tough.


Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future. ~Oscar Wilde.
   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
Fading Light. Offline
I'm sorry you lost.
TeenHelp Addict
************
 
Fading Light.'s Avatar
 
Gender: Data dog
Location: Outer space

Posts: 9,220
Blog Entries: 58
Join Date: September 20th 2009

Re: I'm so confused.. - November 30th 2015, 01:29 AM

Hey.

I think you did put this in the right place, so let's see if I can help a bit.

I've had similar feelings to you. I can remember nights where I just couldn't sleep because I was so terrified by the idea that I was going to die. It didn't matter that I wasn't expecting to die until I'd lived a long happy life - what scared me was the idea that someday I would just cease to exist.

Eventually that feeling faded, but it does come back now and then. In your case it seems like you've identified the trigger - anything involving death (a funeral, a suicide attempt, even just talking about it) can easily bring these feelings rushing back, and once they get stuck in your mind they can be very hard to get out again.

Like Holly said, I would recommend talking to somebody who shares your faith. Are there any churches nearby? You could even try looking around TH; there are quite a few Christians on here, and I'm sure most would be more than happy to offer you advice. You could also try looking in sacred texts for answers - in your case, that would most likely be the Bible. I've found a lot of comfort reading literature related to my faith (which isn't Christian, otherwise I would obviously be able to give you a more detailed answer) and maybe the same can be true for you.

Also, remember that it is perfectly okay to think about these things. Sure, it's scary, and maybe worrying won't get you anywhere - but it's also good to remind yourself that you're not invincible. These feelings can remind you to live each day to the fullest, to go after your goals now, to appreciate what you've got before it's gone. Part of life is accepting the unknown, and unfortunately that means coming to terms with the fact that nobody is really truly certain of what happens after death. But why should that stop you living your life? Worrying about it won't make it any less than inevitable.

You have to find your peace with this, and however you do that is the way that's right for you. Some people find peace in their faith, others in their family, still others in the ebb and flow of life in the universe. Whatever works for you is totally fine. If the feelings are affecting you this much, then it's up to you to find a way to quiet them.

I hope this helped a bit, and I really do wish you the best of luck with it all. Take care.


if you know the hunter's coming
then you hide or keep on running
'cause she's slain the gods before.
   
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
Catlady Offline
Member
Junior TeenHelper
****
 
Catlady's Avatar
 
Age: 19
Gender: Other
Location: USA

Posts: 243
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: November 17th 2015

Re: I'm so confused.. - December 1st 2015, 03:21 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Static Wolfie. View Post
Hey.

I think you did put this in the right place, so let's see if I can help a bit.

I've had similar feelings to you. I can remember nights where I just couldn't sleep because I was so terrified by the idea that I was going to die. It didn't matter that I wasn't expecting to die until I'd lived a long happy life - what scared me was the idea that someday I would just cease to exist.

Eventually that feeling faded, but it does come back now and then. In your case it seems like you've identified the trigger - anything involving death (a funeral, a suicide attempt, even just talking about it) can easily bring these feelings rushing back, and once they get stuck in your mind they can be very hard to get out again.

Like Holly said, I would recommend talking to somebody who shares your faith. Are there any churches nearby? You could even try looking around TH; there are quite a few Christians on here, and I'm sure most would be more than happy to offer you advice. You could also try looking in sacred texts for answers - in your case, that would most likely be the Bible. I've found a lot of comfort reading literature related to my faith (which isn't Christian, otherwise I would obviously be able to give you a more detailed answer) and maybe the same can be true for you.

Also, remember that it is perfectly okay to think about these things. Sure, it's scary, and maybe worrying won't get you anywhere - but it's also good to remind yourself that you're not invincible. These feelings can remind you to live each day to the fullest, to go after your goals now, to appreciate what you've got before it's gone. Part of life is accepting the unknown, and unfortunately that means coming to terms with the fact that nobody is really truly certain of what happens after death. But why should that stop you living your life? Worrying about it won't make it any less than inevitable.

You have to find your peace with this, and however you do that is the way that's right for you. Some people find peace in their faith, others in their family, still others in the ebb and flow of life in the universe. Whatever works for you is totally fine. If the feelings are affecting you this much, then it's up to you to find a way to quiet them.

I hope this helped a bit, and I really do wish you the best of luck with it all. Take care.
Thank you so much! Ahh, I have issues asking people questions like that like not online lol I will try to talk with my Pastor about it.. I just am the type of person that likes knowing exactly what is going to happen and when you never know for sure it's scary... I need to get to the Bible and do some reading.. Thanks again for taking the time to write this out, definitely helped!


Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future. ~Oscar Wilde.
   
  (#9 (permalink)) Old
Fading Light. Offline
I'm sorry you lost.
TeenHelp Addict
************
 
Fading Light.'s Avatar
 
Gender: Data dog
Location: Outer space

Posts: 9,220
Blog Entries: 58
Join Date: September 20th 2009

Re: I'm so confused.. - December 4th 2015, 10:11 PM

That makes sense; it can be a lot easier to talk about these more serious topics when it's not face-to-face. But it can also be very rewarding doing it in person, and your pastor is exactly the kind of person who would be perfect for this. It might be scary talking to him about it, but weigh that against the relief you'll feel when you get some answers and some reassurance. Best of luck, and happy reading.


if you know the hunter's coming
then you hide or keep on running
'cause she's slain the gods before.
   
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
DeletedAccount2
Guest
 
DeletedAccount2's Avatar
Edit avatar
 

Posts: n/a

Re: I'm so confused.. - December 5th 2015, 11:54 PM

Hi. I know this must be very scary. I personally can relate to this. I think of it all the time and worry about death. And it's totally normal to doubt things like this and I'm a Christian too so I think it normal for everyone to doubt and to think about death.

I'm not sure exactly how to fix it because for me, it just goes on and off and I have no control over it. It may help if you can find some safe distractions that will help keep you focused on something good. And I think that people who are somewhat suicidal are at a higher risk of these kinds of thoughts.

Everyone can be curious at times for lots of different reasons and it's only natural to want answers.

Another thing I find helpful is took look at an online bible and search in the word "death" and you might get more answers from God (since you said you're a Christian).

It helps in general to read your bible to stay connected to the Christian faith. I do that ever morning before school which brightens my day just a little more.

One scripture verse I read through one time when I had a bad day was Deuteronomy 14:1= "ye are the children of the Lord your God. Ye shall not cut yourselves nor any baldness between your eyes for the dead."

See how amazing it is when you read something at just the right time when you need it most? It happens to so many people and God is always there to help. So run to him when you're depressed or need help of any sort.

I hope this helps you. Just keep staying strong and never give up!
Pm/vm me anytime! I'm always here to help!
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
ahhhh, confused, help me, so scared

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright ©1998-2018, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.