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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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Jenna Peterson Offline
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Please... - May 21st 2009, 08:13 AM

Please, don't ever count on always having tomorrow. If you've got a friend who's dropped off the map, give them a shout, just to say hello. If a friend's going through a rough spot, call them up and ask to hang out, just to be there. Life's too short and unpredictable.

I lost touch with my friend Justin a couple months ago. He was always such a bright light. He was honest, friendly, easy-going, and always willing to give a killer back rub! He had a great sense of humour, and an even better laugh. He was so sincere, in everything he said and did. He was a good friend to everyone.

Yesterday I found out that he committed suicide Saturday night while visiting family across the border. He overdosed on his anti-depressants, which I wasn't even aware he was taking. I thank God that he was baptised last spring, and I know he's found peace now.

The world has lost a shining star, but heaven has gained an angel.


The walls are high, the walls are strong
I've been trapped in this castle that I built for far too long
You have surrounded me, a sea on every side
The cracks are forming and I've got no where to hide
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Re: Please... - May 23rd 2009, 05:30 AM

Hey Jenna,

I am sorry for your loss. It is so difficult to lose a friend. I agree with you that people should cherish every moment they have together because the future is so uncertain. It is so hard to know when someone is suicidal because most of the time they are good at hiding it. Second guessing yourself about what you could have, would have, should have done isn't going to bring him back and it certainly isn't going to make you happy. If he had reached out to you I am sure you would have helped him to the best of your abilities. However, you didn't know and it is ridiculous to expect yourself to be a mind reader. You can't force help on someone who doesn't want it. I just want to remind you that you are in no way at fault for this. If you start to blame yourself because you think you could have done better just think about all the other people in his life that could have done better too. Would you blame any of them for his death? How can you blame yourself without blaming everyone for the same reason? As much as you might like to change the past regrets will get you no where. On the other hand, finding healthy ways to cope and grieve can help get you through this. Don't be afraid to reach out to someone. You don't have to go through this alone. If you ever need someone to talk to I am here for you. i know how painful it is to lose someone special to suicide. Take care and hang in there.

Lots of love <3 Mimi



As long as we can dream, there will be unicorns.
   
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eunoia Offline
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Re: Please... - May 23rd 2009, 10:30 AM

Hey there, Jenna.

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your friend. Losing someone special to us can be so difficult to cope with; it may feel impossible to understand why such a wonderful person would want to leave us and the world.

It sounds like Justin was a very good friend to you, and a wonderful person overall. It's heartbreaking when the world loses someone like that and it's hard to make peace with the loss of their life, at their own hands. Although it can never bring him back, try to understand that nothing can hurt him anymore.

Remember him for the good things, Jenna. Keep those memories with you because nothing, not even death, can take them away. You cannot make new memories with Justin but the past is yours, always; he can live on in your heart.

Take care of yourself and let me know if you need anything.



Someday I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us.
I told you to be patient
I told you to be fine
I told you to be balanced
I told you to be kind
   
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