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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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Unhappy RIP Grandad - May 21st 2018, 06:41 PM

My grandad passed away just after 5pm this afternoon. We got a call from the nurse around 3pm saying that he wasnt going to last the day and so I went into the care home with my dad and sister to say goodbye but he passed a few minutes before we arrived. In a way i am glad that he passed before i got there so i didnt have to see it happen but would have liked to have been able to say goodbye as i havent seen him in a while. It was one of my first dead bodies i have seen and was a shock, i cant get the image of him laying in that bed out of my head. This is the first person since my friends suicide i have lost and its bringing all the memories back. I dont know what to do 😭
   
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Re: RIP Grandad - May 21st 2018, 07:50 PM

Hello Esme,

I am so sorry about you're loss. Hugs to you. When you have lost someone it is totally okay to be feeling all kinds of things and if you are not sure what to do right now. I am also sorry that you we're not able to say goodbye to him, you can still say it to him, just because you are not able to see him you can talk to him and say whatever you need to say to help you if you would like to. You can say is out loud to him and you can do this when you're alone if you don't want other's hearing what you're saying. If you are up to this idea you and you're family can make a scrapbook and put all kinds of pictures together in this to remember all of the fun times together.
Try doing something to help take you're mind off of this, going for a walk or having on music or putting on a funny TV show or movie or reading a book to help you some. Also it can take time to start to feel better, so do not be too hard on yourself if you are not feeling like yourself in a while. I hope that you will be okay soon. Lots of Hugs.


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Re: RIP Grandad - May 21st 2018, 09:58 PM

Hey there,

I am sorry to hear about your grandad. I know there are no words that can make his passing easier. I hope that you are able to spend time with your family while dealing with this. Have you ever considered seeking out grief counseling or grief groups for the loss of your friend? I think that grief groups aimed at helping people affected by suicide might be something to consider. If there are not any groups like that available maybe individual counseling would help. I know some people who have benefited from grief counseling and since you are dealing with the loss of your friend and the loss of your grandad getting into counseling might be a good idea. There are some places that offer free bereavement counseling too. I know that a local hospice and home health that I volunteer for offers free counseling so maybe you could try and see if there are any free counselors available to you.

I hope that with time things start to improve for you. If you need anything please feel free to message me.


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Re: RIP Grandad - May 22nd 2018, 10:40 PM

Hey,

First of all I'm so sad to hear about your loss. Losing a loved one is super hard regardless of the circumstances, but having it trigger other negative memories must be even harder for you and I'm sorry you're going through this. The main thing I want you to know is you don't have to be alone in this. Don't isolate yourself. Talk to the other people who are going through this loss and tell them how you feel, or even arrange a chat with a counsellor or support service through the hospital if you can. It will help you to get the images and memories out of your head and hopefully help you to move past it all too.

I hope you're doing ok. If you need anything or fancy a chat, feel free to send me a message. Stay strong. Even though he's gone, you can still remember him and make him proud.



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Re: RIP Grandad - May 24th 2018, 09:02 AM

Thanks for all the messages guys. It means a lot xxx
   
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Re: RIP Grandad - May 24th 2018, 11:58 AM

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.

I'm here if you need anything.


   
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