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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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JoJoWildHorse Offline
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(Baby's Death) Mark Timothy Neale, Jr. -- My Baby... - June 2nd 2009, 05:54 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

My angel... My sweet, sweet angel. I know that you forgive me. Mommy loves you. I'll see you when I get to heaven.

I'm sorry that daddy never said he's sorry for what he made mommy do to you.

I wish that I could see you grow up. I wish that I had put my foot down to Mark, your daddy. I wish... I just wish that I could hold you. I just wish that I could hold you just once. Just once, my darling baby...

I'm so sorry. At night, when Mike's asleep, (I left the one that made me hurt you), I can't help but let loose the flood gates that have been heaving to be let open. The tears that rush down my cheeks like Lake Ontario's tide soak my pillow and the blanket that I was going to give to you. I sleep with it every night. Michael understands. He's so sweet. I think you would like him.

I miss you so much, my beautiful boy.

It's June 2nd now... June 17th you were due. 15 days more, and you'd have been brought into this world... God, why the hell did I listen to your father. He didn't know what was right, and yet... Yet I let him talk me into what he did...

My baby... My darling... I miss you so much... I should have never have listened to him...


My Beautiful Daughter

Born: March 4, 2010 at 2:32 pm.
She was: 6 pounds & 4 ounces at 20 inches long.

She is with her new family, Brian & Jessica who love her almost as much as I do.

Last edited by JoJoWildHorse; June 3rd 2009 at 03:48 PM.
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Re: (Baby's Death) Mark Timothy Neale, Jr. -- My Baby... - June 5th 2009, 05:22 PM

It's always hard to lose a loved one, especially an unborn child, I have been through this as well, but my reasoning's for doing it was different. I will be here if you need anything, my thoughts and prayers are with you. PM me anytime hun



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Re: (Baby's Death) Mark Timothy Neale, Jr. -- My Baby... - June 5th 2009, 06:26 PM

I just needed to get it out... It's still so fresh...


My Beautiful Daughter

Born: March 4, 2010 at 2:32 pm.
She was: 6 pounds & 4 ounces at 20 inches long.

She is with her new family, Brian & Jessica who love her almost as much as I do.
  Send a message via Yahoo to JoJoWildHorse  
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Re: (Baby's Death) Mark Timothy Neale, Jr. -- My Baby... - June 5th 2009, 08:20 PM

Jo, I'm so sorry, I cannot imagine how hard this is for you.
Congratulations for posting here, feel free to just let any emotion your feeling come out x
My heart goes out to you, stay strong sweetheart.
Jess x


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Re: (Baby's Death) Mark Timothy Neale, Jr. -- My Baby... - June 5th 2009, 09:46 PM

*hugsss* Sad post... I was warned though... Just all the best



How can one love themselves, when they love absolutely nothing?
Do something that is interesting. If it is not interesting, find out why it is not interesting.
   
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Re: (Baby's Death) Mark Timothy Neale, Jr. -- My Baby... - June 5th 2009, 11:13 PM

*hugs back* I mean... I have a ton of support from my boyfriend right now, but I'll tell you what, it's still so hard... He doesn't know how to help me...

I don't want to forget my baby, but I want the pain to go away. I'm so sick of hurting from this.

I mean, with the possible new pregnancy, I'm scared that I'm going to reject this baby. I'm so scared that I'm not going to do the right thing to raise my child. I'm so scared...

I want this but I don't... Does that make sense??


My Beautiful Daughter

Born: March 4, 2010 at 2:32 pm.
She was: 6 pounds & 4 ounces at 20 inches long.

She is with her new family, Brian & Jessica who love her almost as much as I do.
  Send a message via Yahoo to JoJoWildHorse  
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Re: (Baby's Death) Mark Timothy Neale, Jr. -- My Baby... - June 5th 2009, 11:27 PM

Everything that you missed out on with Mark Timothy Neal Jr, you can do with the new baby.

I'm so so sorry. *bigggg hugg*
I shed a tear when I read "At night, when Mike's asleep, (I left the one that made me hurt you), I can't help but let loose the flood gates that have been heaving to be let open. The tears that rush down my cheeks like Lake Ontario's tide soak my pillow and the blanket that I was going to give to you."
I like how that was written.


To Write Love On Her Arms<3
   
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Re: (Baby's Death) Mark Timothy Neale, Jr. -- My Baby... - June 9th 2009, 03:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by DontGiveUpHope View Post
Everything that you missed out on with Mark Timothy Neal Jr, you can do with the new baby.

I'm so so sorry. *bigggg hugg*
I shed a tear when I read "At night, when Mike's asleep, (I left the one that made me hurt you), I can't help but let loose the flood gates that have been heaving to be let open. The tears that rush down my cheeks like Lake Ontario's tide soak my pillow and the blanket that I was going to give to you."
I like how that was written.

I can get those words past my fingers, but when Mike asks me to talk to him about how I feel... I can't. I can't get the words past my lips. I can get them through my fingers, but not through my lips...


My Beautiful Daughter

Born: March 4, 2010 at 2:32 pm.
She was: 6 pounds & 4 ounces at 20 inches long.

She is with her new family, Brian & Jessica who love her almost as much as I do.
  Send a message via Yahoo to JoJoWildHorse  
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