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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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What to say to a friend... - June 12th 2009, 10:26 PM

A really close friend of my friend died a few days ago.
He was only 18... I didn't know him personally, but I feel sad because of it, even though he was just a friendly face in the school halls to me.

And my friend is really upset. I just don't know what to do... I don't know what I can say or do to make him feel better.

Does anyone have any advice on how to help a grieving friend?
   
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Re: What to say to a friend... - June 13th 2009, 12:02 AM

I definitely can relate to this as several of my friends passed away this year. It's natural to feel upset about what happened, even if you weren't very close to him to begin with. The simple fact in knowing that someone very young passed away is tragic in itself, and will likely cause grief. It's normal.

How to help your friend? Continue being the friend you're being. It seems like you care about your friend quite a bit and I'm sure he really appreciates it. What does your friend like to do? You may want to do something with him to help him get his mind off of what happened. If he likes sports, perhaps you can offer to take him to a game or something.

You must also understand that grieving is a part of life. No matter what you do or how good of a friend you are, he's going to feel a lot of pain and be upset. You can definitely reduce that feeling for him but you can't make it disappear altogether. Offer to give your friend some space to help him cope with this, in his own way. We all deal with things differently.


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Re: What to say to a friend... - June 20th 2009, 06:27 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by LilyLullaby View Post
A really close friend of my friend died a few days ago.
He was only 18... I didn't know him personally, but I feel sad because of it, even though he was just a friendly face in the school halls to me.

And my friend is really upset. I just don't know what to do... I don't know what I can say or do to make him feel better.

Does anyone have any advice on how to help a grieving friend?
Hey there, Lily.

I know it's been a week since you've posted this thread, I'm sorry for the last response. I wanted to respond though, anyways.

I'm really sorry for your loss; although you weren't really close with this person, it sounds like they were very nice and a great friend to a friend of your own.

Try to just be there for your friend. Offer to listen if he needs to talk, or just to be a presence when he's feeling alone. Let him know that you are available to him to talk to, and then probably let it rest. It may take some for him to feel ready to open up about things; he may just now feel ready, or it may take even more time. Be understanding of what he is going through and don't push too much, you know?

Take care. Let me know if you need anything.



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