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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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Li'l H Offline
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Thumbs down Don't Know How I Feel - July 18th 2009, 11:11 AM

Okay so my Dad died on a few days ago in an accident: I loved him a lot and I know he loved me and my brother and mum a lot too.

The day he died, all three of us cried a lot and we cried a bit the day after too. Now, though, I just feel strange. I can talk to my friends and have a laugh with them then I can talk to them about Dad a bit as well. My family is very supportive, relatives come round and my mum's supportive and everying.

I miss my Dad and I want him back, but I dunno, I just don't feel like I'm grieving propolarly? Should I not be breaking down or something because I don't feel like that, I just feel like I miss him. I'm not sure but I think my mum's a bit worried and thinks that I'm holding it in but I'm not.

I loved him so much but why am I not grieving propolarly? Has anyone else lost someone and felt this way?
   
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Re: Don't Know How I Feel - July 18th 2009, 11:26 AM

There's no typical way of 'grieving properly' because everyone, absolutely everyone deals with it in different ways. Everything is normal: not eating, bingeing, wanting to be alone, being terrified of being alone, crying, not hsedding a tear...... they're all normal because everyone reacts to bad situations in their own way. My grandad died when I was ten and I didn't cry about it for three years, even though i really missed him.
I'm so sorry that this happened to you love, it must be hard on your family. Please don't worry and don't feel guilty that you're not reaacting in a different way. Maybe just let your mum know that you're there to support her and your brother and that you'll be there to help with anything she needs at the moment.
Take care hun. *hug*
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Re: Don't Know How I Feel - July 18th 2009, 11:44 AM

People grieve in different ways and your just doing it in your own way again, don't feel bad. I'm so sorry this happened to you, just stay strong as a family and you'll get through this together.
PM if you need too.


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Re: Don't Know How I Feel - July 20th 2009, 06:42 AM

First of all I'm really, really sorry about your dad. I have never lost a parent, but I have lost a sister. It sucks alot to lose a loved one. The first few days I felt the same way your feeling. I missed my sister, but I didn't break down or anything. Thats how they always seem to protray someone in movies and tv when they losed a loved one, but honestly its probably not like that for a lot of people. People grieve in different ways and theres steps to grieving. At first I was even in denial that she was really gone. Just recently though a month after her death is when it really seemed to sink in. Another thing is your probably still in shock. I mean its not like you knew something was going to happen to your dad, same as I didn't know my sister was going to die. Its hard to imagine life without that person. You'll never be the same but things well get better. I'm not good at this advice and helping people thing. I'm trying so please forgive me if I wasn't of any help. Take care



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Re: Don't Know How I Feel - July 20th 2009, 05:34 PM

Hey.
Fisrtly, I'm so sorry about what's happened. I can't even begin to imagine how it feels to lose a parent, and my heart goes out to you
Everyone grieves in different way- I don't eventhink there is a set way. Everyone is different, so don't feel bad. It doesn't mean you don't love him as much as everyone else, or miss him as much because I'm sure you do-you're showing your emotions in your way and that's perfectly fine.
It's probably still such a shock for you sweetheart.

Everyone at TH is here for you if you need support. Anytime. Just drop me a message if you need someone to talk to.

Take care of yourself.
Jess <3


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