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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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silentmuffin Offline
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Bad dreams and bad thoughts - July 18th 2009, 10:16 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of death or grieving, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I'm just curious if anyone else has experienced these things as part of mourning the loss of a loved one. My grandmother died a little over 2 weeks ago, and since then I've been having nightmares and I guess what you'd call paranoid delusional thoughts. My dreams aren't really like nightmares as I'm not scared in the dream, but when I wake up I realize how creepy it is. It's usually someone I don't know (different people every time) who are dead and I'm just looking at them, waiting for them to move or breathe or wake up. I think it's because I watched my grandmother die and it was such a surreal experience to see it happen and just notice her chest stop rising.

I'm also afraid of the dark now. Her room is at the end of the hallway, and I get the creepiest feeling walking down the hall at night. I'm afraid when I'm in my room, thinking she's standing outside my door scratching her fingernails on the door or reaching in to grab me. I also keep imagining when I was sitting next to her bed as she was dying, crying right by her face, and imagining her jumping up or lunging at me. It's pretty horrible, I hate to think of my grandmother this way, like some evil spirit in a horror movie or something. She was my best friend and we were really close, and it just sucks so much that this is how I'm thinking of her, instead of thinking good things.

I don't know if it's a normal reaction to death as she's the first person who I was really close to that's died. Has anyone else experienced anything like this?

Aš tave myliu, Nanny. I'm carrying your love with me.
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atelyn-kayy Offline
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Re: Bad dreams and bad thoughts - July 19th 2009, 05:11 AM

Hey Lyndsay

It is very normal for you to be reacting this way. The loss of a loved one
is a surreal experience for anyone, and we all react differently. These nightmares
and thoughts are just your way of coping with the situation. Eventually they will
cease, so have faith in that. If they're too much for you to handle, try to find
someone you're close to, and tell them about it. They may not be able to
physically do anything about it, but they'll always be there for you through your
anxieties. I can personally say that I have had something similar to what you're
experiencing, (my dad passed almost two years ago) so I can relate. I think
this is just your mind adjusting to the stress of the situation, so don't think you're
crazy, it happens to anyone.
If you need to talk I'm definitely always a PM away!
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Re: Bad dreams and bad thoughts - July 19th 2009, 06:43 AM

Hi there. I replied to your last thread, and I'll reply to this one as well. I, too, recently lost a grandparent. I know how hard it is. I haven't really had bad dreams or anything relating to my grandfather, but I've had had a few dreams when someone--such as my grandmother, for instance, ended up gone. I know it hurts, but perhaps you could ease the grief a little by doing something you enjoy to take your mind off of things. Please know that I'm here for you and feel free to PM/VM me anytime.
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