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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Zace Offline
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dad's suiside - August 9th 2009, 01:53 PM

it's been 2 years but i thought i would be better by now, i was depressed before my dad died my mum had cancer and i was abused but i handled all that okay but when my dad died i got sent over the edge i have been wanting to kill myself every day smoking or drinking when i can and just getting so angry over the smallest things....

i have been to see doctors and had pills to help but none of them do the doctors are idiots and i've given up i don't go to school and havent for 2 years, i barely eat, i stay awake for up to 2 days at a time, i just feel hollow inside.

does anyone know what i can do!?
   
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Re: dad's suiside - August 9th 2009, 02:36 PM

I'm really sorry about your loss, I couldn't imagine what I would do if I was in this situation. You are very strong for making it this far! Asking for help is the best thing to do, have you considered talking to anyone about how your feeling?

pm me if you need anything
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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: dad's suiside - August 9th 2009, 03:04 PM

Hey Isaac. I'm sorry about you losing your dad, it's never easy to deal with losing someone close to us, and like with every problem, sometimes we may turn to negative solutions for what we are going through such as smoking and drinking. You say you've been to doctors and received pills. Could it be the pills aren't exactly working because your depression is due to problems you're facing? Pills can help, but to an extent. You still need to learn how to deal with the problems you are currently facing, such as your dad's suicide. Have you ever tried to talk to a therapist while on the medication? The pills are not going to make everything suddenly perfect, you also have to work towards reaching a more stable place in your life. Maybe you should go to the doctor who prescribed you with the medication, and see if they can direct you towards a therapist who is able to help with the kind of issues you're dealing with in your life right now. The doctors simply want to help, you just need to give them a chance. There are ways to get through these things, and I really hope you don't lose hope that you can in fact make it through this. If you ever need to talk, PM me anytime.





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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: dad's suiside - August 9th 2009, 04:19 PM

I would talk to someone but I'm not that close to anyone, not even my mum or sister i don't have to many friends either.
   
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Re: dad's suiside - August 9th 2009, 05:07 PM

I can understand where you are coming from.
I know that you would rather talk to someone
you could trust than someone you don't know.

I lost my best friend to suicide and I know what
you are going through. If you ever need or want
to talk I am more than willing to help you through
this. Just let me know and I'll get back quickly.

Good luck && Stay strong Isaac,
Paige
   
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Re: dad's suiside - August 9th 2009, 05:08 PM

Have you tried talking to a councellor maybe?



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Re: dad's suiside - August 9th 2009, 05:30 PM

im very sorry that you are feeling this way,
your very strong to have dealt with all of this.
i think you should talk to your mom about getting a therapist.
you do need help and you need to reach out to family, friends,
teachers anyone to try and get it.

good luck.
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Zace Offline
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Re: dad's suiside - August 9th 2009, 05:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Reakless Emotion View Post
Have you tried talking to a councellor maybe?
yea i have but i them hard to talk to.
   
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Re: dad's suiside - August 9th 2009, 09:16 PM

I know that talking to therapists
and counselors can be very difficult
to talk to, especially about things that
are so difficult to discuss. I've been there
and it is hard. Well I am sure that these
past two years have been really difficult
for you to cope with.

Try to keep your head up and think
positive and with time you will begin
to heal.

Good luck,
Paige
   
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Re: dad's suiside - August 10th 2009, 07:30 PM

Losing a person to suicide can be one of the most sudden and heartbreaking ways to face loss. It's hard to understand why someone would want to "leave you" and, truth be told, you may never understand what hurt your father so badly that he would take his own life. At the same time, you have faced suicidal thoughts and feelings so you are, in a sense, forced to understand.

Try to believe that your dad is in a better place. Even if you do not believe in Heaven, simply reminding yourself that he cannot hurt, anymore, may help to ease even a little of the pain.


You may have had little luck with therapists in the past, but why not at least consider giving it another shot? I know a lot of people have probably told you that talking about it will help, and it is discouraging to try and realize that, so far, talking hasn't done a thing. But it really CAN help and I hope you'll consider trying again.

Please remember, also, that TH is always here for you. That includes me; don't hesitate to PM me if you ever need to talk. Take care.



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Re: dad's suiside - August 10th 2009, 09:19 PM

Hey (:

When I first read your post it shocked me how similar our situations are. I too lost my dad to suicide and I still haven't come to terms with it. I'm not close with my surviving family either and I personally feel far too awkward talking about it with friends who just don't understand. I'm not going to pretend I understand you because I know I don't. Your experience is unique to you but I do think that our experiences have been somewhat the same when it comes to therapy. I gave it try after try with different people. I wanted help but I never felt safe enough to open up with any professional. I was about ready to give up and in some ways I already had when I decided to give things one last chance. About 3 weeks ago I started therapy again and finally got some luck. I just had an immediate connection with my counselor and it's given me some hope. Do you have anyone who's opinion you trust that could recommend a therapist? Don't panic if you don't. You might get lucky just picking someone at random (: No matter what happens with therapy you can always come to me to talk to. Since we've both been through this I think we could help each other a lot. PM me if you need me. You don't have to do this alone. Take care and hang in there. It does get easier to cope.

Lots of love<3 Mimi



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Re: dad's suiside - August 11th 2009, 06:45 PM

Hey Isaac, I'm sorry about ur loss, I know how it feels, to wake up everday, but just want to stay in bed, and everything is just different than before, I guess u were just so used to ur dad being around, that when he left this place, everything was new and different, almost gloomy,
But you have to ask yourself this, wud ur dad be happy with the way u are now? Wudnt ur dad want you to continue living, to continue from where u picked up from,graduate?
I'm sorry for how u are feeling, if u ever want to talk, u can pm me anytime, we are all here for you, and I mean that
You're strong, u can get through this.
   
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