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Umberto November 1st 2009 09:46 PM

My granny died one week ago today. She was 88 and had been in hospital for nearly 6 weeks so it wasnt a suprise. My auntie was her carer and she was so stressed about it all i was worried she was headed for a breakdown. I was so busy last week with the funeral and everything i didnt feel at all sad and all in all i really feel that it was for the best that she died now.

But today i feel really sad. I cant stop thinking about her. I wish i had visited her in the hospital more, i wish i had asked her more questions and i wish she had told me more stories. I dont know why i was fine all week and upset today. One of the last things she said was that she wasnt ready to go and wanted more time with us. I just feel so sad.

*Jen* November 2nd 2009 11:18 PM

Re: granny

I am really sorry to hear about this. It is only natural to feel sad. Sometimes grief doesn't hit you straight away, which is why you might not have felt sad to start with. I know she might have said she wasn't ready to go and wanted more time with you, which shows how much she loved and cared about you but it seems like she lived a good life. I don't know how she passed away but if she was in pain then perhaps it was for the best to stop her suffering. I can understand just how hard it is and it is going to take time to come to terms with. But you need to keep reminding yourself that although she didn't want to go she did live a good life and I bet you have lots of happy memories you spent together. When you feel sad hold onto these happy memories.

You might have regrets now about what you could/should have done. But there is no point in having regrets because you can't change the past. Perhaps it would help to talk to people close to you at the moment because they might be feeling similar to you so you might be able to support each other through it.

I am always here if you need someone to chat to. Stay strong.

Umberto November 7th 2009 11:52 PM

Re: granny
Ive talked to my family about it and im feeling much better. I miss her but at the same time I know that she had an amazing life and that it was her time. Thanks so much for your reply and advice :)

amystery November 8th 2009 12:39 AM

Re: granny

I'm sorry to hear about your Granny. I know how hard it is to lose someone close to you. As Jen mentioned grief doesn't always hit right away; especially when you are busy with the funeral and other family members being around. :hug: *hugs* Just make sure you take that time to grieve though. Its important to remember the happy memories and all the good times you shared with her. Forget about all the "I wish I'd have.." 's. Personally, I wasted a lot of time thinking about all the things I wish I could've changed or done differently. Those times when I could've been there but wasn't...but that gets you no where and only leaves you upset.

Also, remember that your family is always there for you and they're going through the same thing. They're often a great support system because they understand how you are feeling and can help you through it. There will always be those days you miss her but it does get easier I promise <3

<3 Take Care and if you ever need someone to talk to I'm always here.

*Jen* November 8th 2009 07:04 AM

Re: granny
You are more than welcome :) If you ever need someone to chat then I am always here anytime so don't be alone. I am really glad you are feeling much better after talking to family. Hopefully you can all support each other through this. Of course you will always miss her but in time it will hopefully become less painful.

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