friend's dad...

[iamverybeautiful]

My friend's dad passed away last month and today is the first time I'm seeing my friend since the funeral.

I'm a little worried as to what I should say/not say. I've already offered my condolences a lot and told him to call me if he needs anything.

[Kate*]

Take your cues from him. This is never an easy situation to deal with and what he needs or wants will depend his own grieving process. If he seems okay and he just wants to hang out like always, do that, if he needs to talk, cry etc. then be a good listener and comfort him. What to say and not say will become more clear as you learn how he's reacting.

[Chris.]

I agree. I would just hangout - don't bring it up! If he brings it up, then fine, be there for him and just be a good listener. But if he doesn't bring it up - then try not to think about it and just have some fun.

If people keep bring it up everytime they are around him, then he wont be able to go through the grieving process as fast as he should. So just be there for him if he needs to talk, but also if he just wants to hangout.



Best wishes,
Chris

[Audacious]

Hey there.

What a sticky situation! You want to hang out with your friend, but you are afraid of saying the wrong thing. I'm sure your friend is still grieving, and that may make you feel ackward.

Like others have said, take cues from your friend. If they want to talk about it, they will likely bring it up if they know you are open to helping. IF they do bring it up, be a listening ear. Be an attentive and active listener (don't look away or try to avoid talking) and then offer what you can as far as a hug or condolences or understanding/empathy. Ask them if there is anything they would like from you, or what you can do to help. That takes the guesswork out !

I wish you good luck! Just remember to be available like you said you were going to be.

Take care !
Jen