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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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Unhappy My "best friend" teasing and mocking me... - February 6th 2013, 11:43 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of peer pressure or bullying, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I apologise for the longevity of this thread but I just don't know what else to do...

Erm, well, where to begin?!

I can take a joke, I am not a zombie with zero humour BUT this one friend tests my patience... She constantly swears at her friends, and insults us (as jokes) I mean, you can barely ecognise where to draw the line between serious and her "fun" side.

But, either way, I absolutely hated her doing this.. I mean, I love her, but hate her behaviour, it seems ridiculously immature. But, of course, I would laugh along and pretend I really didn't care.


Well, I started wearing a skirt to school (first time in 4 years now guys soooo I was stressing like crazy and felt soo nauseous I ended up in the bathroom in the middle of assembly dry heaving ) And when I saw them, S was like OMG you're wearing a skirt, that is out of context. And J said quick, run, it's too weird. So, I ended up having to powerwalk after them.... And this just made my stress levels worse thinking they were pretty much saying I looked really stupid, fat and ugly in a skirt

Anyway, the next day she was in a bit of a bitchy mood because S and our other friend A both have boyfriends so they ditch us to hang out with them and it's awkward for both of us coz we're the single ones with nobody else to talk to.

I have mild asperges, but I fit in at school because, seriously, what teenager doesn't talk immature shit at time, or random drivel. I hate social situations, I do, I may act confident, but inside my stomach is torn and I have to assure myself that I wont fuck it up... Anyway, I was making light conversation, but we didn't talk much. But, then somehow I ended up in her bad books! I haven't said ANYTHING to offend her! Other than something I said came out wrong, we were in science on Tuesday and my teacher had lost my work and I was hurrying to finish and I was ignoring their distracting bullshit (I ended up finishing the booklet and they'd only barely managed to fill in a couple of numbers). I told them I used to be able to drown out distractions really well I was practicing ignoring everything, I quickly made sure she knew what I meant, I just want to do well in science, and pretty much every other subject.

OKay, the next day in science. Oh, dang, I got the days wrong, that all happened on monday, this was tuesday, fuck, sorry about that. Okay, tuesday rolled around and we were in science again, often times when I think I tap my thumb or my pen against my lip. I look up and what is J doing?! Mocking me! I was like "hey, what are you doing?" Trying to make fun of it, but she gave me this horrid nasty look and said, "oh, sorry, am I doing it wrong?" She grabbed her page and pretended to be reading it really intensely (I have crappy eyes so at times I squint to focus and I do look mildly intense).

So, my friends of course laughed at J's antics and I was left nearly crying... She have three people, all girls, in my class with the same name as me, J calls me by my last name and when the teacher was handing out our work she said to me, "it's confusing having three ____ in this class" and I said she could call me Jay. J interrupted though, "no, miss, call her Abbott, everybody calls her that, nobody calls her (inserts last name here)" I said, "Actually, people do" she then replied, "yeah, only your fucked up online friends."

I was fucking ready to stand up and punch her out, my friend S noted that and J just gave me this coy grin and like an aussie said "come at me bro" I would have might I not been in a skirt...

Now, in maths, last period of the day, I always sit behind A and J. And I can hear some of what they talk about and then drop their voices and J looks back and gives me the nastiest of nasty looks... and, look, this is how much it effected me, I am usually quite opinionated in classes and especially maths, I'm quite confident and striving to be moving back up to my old class. And it just made me shut up, I didn't answer any of the most obvious questions, and even the easy questions I said it wrong but wrote it down correctly.

I am over her bull, and this caused me to do something I shouldn't of done but I was just over life, and over it all

Apparently, she is going to have a go at me tomorrow (she was going to today but she wasn't here) so my stomach is in knots, and I'm sick as well, soooo, I really don't know how to put up with this...

If anybody read this whole thing, I thank you so much I'm just over being bullied... I mean, I don't wear my skirt short like everybody else but people aren't bullying me for that! Only J is left that bully's me. I'm trying to overcome self harm, suicidal urges, and even depression.. which I can't if I still have one person bullying me, it makes me feel weak and makes me remember other things I'd rather keep in the dark....

Help me... I can't turn her in because I don't want my mum to know how much stress and school and her is effecting me...

Minus telling mum and the school, what else can I do? This girl doesn't scare me, she's just obnoxious and ignorant... A few months back she told me I had no reason to SH, and told me I wasn't a real sh'er and that my life wasn't bad enough to drive me to cut... I haven't told her everything, obviously, but I'm just sick of people looking at me and thinking I'm just another attention seeker..

Jay.


Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
A whisper in the dark; is better than silence in the light. -Courtesy of your's truly.
My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!

When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
   
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Re: My "best friend" teasing and mocking me... - February 6th 2013, 04:17 PM

Hey,

I read your post (well written) and I just wanted to reply with a post I put up on my blog a week or so ago. I feel it relates. Just remember though, no one is better at being YOU than YOU. Bullies are insecure and put others down because they are feeling bad about themselves. This is how they make themselves feel better! Stay Strong. Heres the post:

""They'll think this, they'll think that"

They will always think. They will never stop thinking. They will always exist and They will never go away. Since They are always a constant in a life of variables, we must attempt to be content with constants, the uncontrollable's; the They's.

You know when you repeat a word enough it becomes strange? "They" seems like such a weird word right now. Anyways...

What I am getting at is this: FORGET (replace with another F word is need be) what others think of you. The truth is, most of the time they aren't even thinking of you! People are absorbed in themselves and a majority of the time the "I" comes first. Even if YOU think about other people a lot, it does not mean that they are doing the same. So, here is a good tip to eliminate the pattern of worrying about what others are thinking in general.

Next time you find yourself worried about what others will think of you in any given situation, repeat this:

"What they are thinking is none of my business"

Simple, right? Saying this sentence will enforce a boundary between their thoughts and yours. When you realize something is none of your business, you tend to steer clear, especially when you are putting this boundary on yourself. Try it and practice.


So, who are they? You may think you know, but nobody really does. They do their thing, we do ours. Plus, the only one we really know is ourselves and that is what we have complete control over

BIG PICTURE: I am on this earth for what, 70-100 years? Scary thought, but for me, a perspective of motivation. Since I am here for this short amount of time, I'm NOT spending it listening to the dictates of other people. In this perspective there are no limitations, no boundaries and no self-hatred. I believe the ultimate test of strength is to be YOU. To say "I'm going to be my complete self and I'm not changing for anyone" is one of the most difficult things to put into action.

So, who are They?
   
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Re: My "best friend" teasing and mocking me... - February 7th 2013, 05:43 AM

Thanks for reading my thread

I found out why she's been picking on me from a friend... apparently she sees me as a "puppy dog" (the term means that I follow somebody around seemingly like a puppy does.) And also that I "crowd" her which I do not... I get sick of her really easily...

And I asked another friend of mine if I'm a clingy friend, she answered that I am not...

I am fed up with this shit and she will be moving schools soon which is fine by me!

Jay.


Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
A whisper in the dark; is better than silence in the light. -Courtesy of your's truly.
My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!

When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
   
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Re: My "best friend" teasing and mocking me... - February 7th 2013, 11:59 PM

Bullying isn't something that friends do, so if she's saying things that hurt you terribly, then I have to say--you shouldn't be friends. A few years ago, there was a girl who called me a who*e because I was talking to her boyfriend [who I had known since I was 4 years old and would NEVER date]. I thought her and I were friends, or at least on friendly-terms, yet after all the nasty things she said about me, I learned that I was sooo much better not having to take all the s[tuff] she threw at me. You're better off without this girl [And kudos to you for not wearing your skirt short, sadly, many girls do... and personally, I hate wearing anything other that jeans, so my friends are always a little shocked when I decide to wear a skirt].
Something that helps me, when I'm angry at someone, is to write a list of all the things I can't stand about them [how they treat me, how they're so obnoxious, etc.]. Then when you're done, tear it up. I usually don't express my negetives thoughts about someone to other people--I try my best to be a good person, yet sometimes, things tend to slip :P I'm not perfect, no one is.
And if she's going to have a "go" at you tomorrow, stick with a group of people you trust or any group of people that aren't affiliated with her. If she says something nasty to you, when you get home [or any where private], do the list thing.
One more word of advice [sorry if this whole thing was confusing to read, I'm not good with staying on topic], don't show them any weakness. When you do, they practically feed off of it, and strive for more. By keeping your head up, and proving to them it doesn't matter, they'll [hopefully] stop.
Seriously though, if it continues after a while, or get's any worse, tell a teacher. They need to be punished for what they're doing to you, no one deserves to be treated in such a way.
Good luck, and keep your head up
   
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Re: My "best friend" teasing and mocking me... - February 9th 2013, 06:35 AM

Thanks so much,

She wasn't there for the end of last week. And these is no reason for her behaviour, all my friends have actually told me to ignore her due to her being in one of those moods she is even more full on than usual, even her BESTEST friend is getting sick of her and is saying her moods have been flicking, like, they both do cadets together and J said that she was sick of the drama and the guys and S was the same. Then, they go to cadets and J starts hugging the guys (which is against rules, showing affection to guys is a major no-no). And she has now been saying how much she loves cadets and can't wait for it.

I don't know what is going on with her, but she has changed for the worst... and even S, C, D, C, A, and A see it. Sooo, I have a growing group of friends, and now can go from on to the other when S and A isn't with their boyfriends. I'm surprised how quickly I was enveloped into another group.

Jay.


Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
A whisper in the dark; is better than silence in the light. -Courtesy of your's truly.
My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!

When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
   
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Re: My "best friend" teasing and mocking me... - February 9th 2013, 11:14 PM

Hey there Jay.

There isn't a whole lot I can add in here, but I'm really glad you've found some other people you can hang out with. I don't know if you've tried this or not, but what about just calling her out on her bullshit. Telling her that what she's saying and doing is unfair, upsetting you, and turning her friends against her. Maybe she doesn't actually realise how much she's upsetting you. If she does know, (or doesn't) and just doesn't care, then honestly? She's not a friend. She's just someone you happen to hang with who is a total bitch. Sounds harsh, but I know how you're feeling and I know how hard it is to have people make fun of you and make your problems seem like no big deal.

PM me if you ever need to, yeah? I could write a bible on friendship issues.

Louise.


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Re: My "best friend" teasing and mocking me... - February 9th 2013, 11:31 PM

Hey Louise,

Thanks so much.

I think she knows, because I give her dirty looks, and she often gives them right back at me to. I at times tell her to be quiet, and then she wonders why her best friend is moody after she says something, or my other friend walks off. J just says she's sulking which is unfair.

Jay.


Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
A whisper in the dark; is better than silence in the light. -Courtesy of your's truly.
My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!

When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
   
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Re: My "best friend" teasing and mocking me... - February 12th 2013, 05:11 PM

mocking gets old after like 3 weeks you don't need her she is waste of space if she treats you like shit its not fear on you have you not tried avoiding them hang out with them other people they sound great you dont need small shits like her one day she will come crying back to you. make sure you give her the same treatment sorry i can't go on for long ym laptop is being an ass ahaha anyway you must get my point by now if you wanna talk feel free to pm me jay
   
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Re: My "best friend" teasing and mocking me... - February 12th 2013, 10:54 PM

Thanks.

Well, yesterday she started picking on me again in last period maths and annoying me so I practically ran from the room when the bell went.. I even snapped at somebody I was so angry, I just needed to get out of there before that girl ended up with a broken nose or a few broken teeth

Jay.


Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
A whisper in the dark; is better than silence in the light. -Courtesy of your's truly.
My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!

When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
   
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