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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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Fellow coworker (friend) dobbed the assistant manager in - December 12th 2015, 07:54 AM

Hi everyone
I'm friendly with the assistant manager at work and she always has a joke with me at work. She often insults me in a jokey way which I find funny but I told Megan how she almost made me cry once because she always moans at me and Megan told the manager that the assistant managers jokes upset me and she got told off. It's really awkward now and there's nothing that can be done what should I do?

The main manager doesn't want to talk about it anymore but it feels awkward now...
   
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Re: Fellow coworker (friend) dobbed the assistant manager in - December 12th 2015, 06:45 PM

Hey Justin,

I would speak with the assistant manager and let her know that it wasn't you who said anything and you were speaking with a co-worker and she took it upon herself and brought it up with management. Obviously you didn't want to go and bring it up yourself, so you didn't raise it. I think it was wrong of this girl to say something without consulting you. At the end of the day this was through no fault of yours, so you have no need to feel guilty, just make sure your assistant manager is aware of this and hopefully things will start to improve.

I wish you the best of luck, and I'm here anytime!
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Re: Fellow coworker (friend) dobbed the assistant manager in - December 13th 2015, 02:24 PM

I think this girl was trying to help you, but she should have asked you before saying anything to management. I agree with what was already said. I think you should talk to the assistant manager and see if that helps things.

Hope you're hanging in there.


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Re: Fellow coworker (friend) dobbed the assistant manager in - December 13th 2015, 10:00 PM

Hey, Justin.

As Cass, said, I think Megan was only trying to help you too. I suggest talking with her and letting her know you appreciated that, but then kindly state how you'd appreciate if she'd consult you before speaking to your manager in the future.

Things will likely be awkward with your manager right now, but I'm sure the uncomfortable feeling will soon pass with time. Of course you can talk to your manager if you feel a conversation about this will be beneficial towards improving this situation, but if you don't think so, then I suggest continuing on with work until things get back to normal between you and your manager. After all, Paige is right that this wasn't your fault.

Best of luck with work. I'm sure it'll feel less awkward with time. Take care!
   
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Re: Fellow coworker (friend) dobbed the assistant manager in - December 16th 2015, 03:04 AM

I have been in similar situation before. What started as a joke ended up with my HR manager calling me in for a closed door discussion with the perception that I was unhappy in my job and even asked if I wanted transfer.

Although it felt nonsensical or even slightly betrayed by my colleague at first, I thought the best thing to do at that time was to let it go. Eventually I learned that not everyone take jokes well. Although we'd forget about this incident in time to come, but the relationship with the other colleague became only work friendly (only about matters related to work).

In all my past employments, there were / had been only a handful of extremely close colleagues. I stayed professionally friendly with most of them, we can talk about anything except personal issues.




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