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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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Astar Offline
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Help - February 8th 2016, 10:05 PM

My bestmate in college is male.. We are just friends but were very close and hug and hold hands and stuff a lot. A lot of people think we're dating. He's not very popular in college in our class and some of the mean group tease him.. When I got close to him they often tease us saying we're dating and occasionally take pics.. There never mean to me otherwise though.. Only just about him.. I've got bad anxiety and hate the comments.. I get scared to go to college now even though there not really picking on me.. My only option is to ditch my bestmate.. Don't think I want to do that though..


I can do it and I can get through it. So can you xx
   
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Re: Help - February 9th 2016, 04:17 AM

There's nothing wrong with having a male best friend and I bet it's tough when you're teased about it. Have you told them that you're not dating? Even if you have, they might not believe it because of how close both of you are. I know it's easier said than done, but I think you should try to tune them out. If they're not given the reactions they're looking for, hopefully they'll eventually stop.

Even if you were dating, there's nothing wrong with that, either. I think your peers have nothing better to do and are using their down time to pick on you and your friend. Your life isn't their business. So if they want to think you're dating your friend, let them think that.

How do you cope with your anxiety? Maybe you can use your existing skills or look into new ones. Breathing exercises are helpful, as is positive self-talk. It can be challenging to keep up with your coping skills sometimes, but they do go a long way.


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Re: Help - February 9th 2016, 10:29 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Astar View Post
My bestmate in college is male.. We are just friends but were very close and hug and hold hands and stuff a lot. A lot of people think we're dating. He's not very popular in college in our class and some of the mean group tease him.. When I got close to him they often tease us saying we're dating and occasionally take pics.. There never mean to me otherwise though.. Only just about him.. I've got bad anxiety and hate the comments.. I get scared to go to college now even though there not really picking on me.. My only option is to ditch my bestmate.. Don't think I want to do that though..
Bitches will be bitches. People will do and say what they want. We're powerless over others. Don't stop being friends with someone just because you have anxiety over it. It sounds like he needs a friend. Be there for him. Here's something that will help you gain some perspective: you and him get the better end of the deal. Those people have to LIVE with being shitty human beings. You can choose to just walk away and not associate with them. There will always be people in the world who try to talk down to and about others. It's an unfortunate fact of life. You should not sacrifice a friendship soley on the fact that you don't want to be around people who are mean. There's rude and disrespectful people everywhere. All that matters is that you feel comfortable with yourself as a person. Love and be kind to yourself. Friendships are priceless. Don't throw yours away.
   
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