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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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Something really embarrassing happened.. - January 15th 2017, 03:36 AM

This year during the summer I cut my hair myself, it's still SUPER short and uneven, and just messed up. So I've been wearing a wig to school, work, and and everywhere for the past 7 months. People at school have almost suspected me of wearing a wig which makes me feel bad enough. I'm sure a lot of people can figure it out though or have. Friday I was really late to class. I picked up this girl, she's not really my friend st all. She lies constantly and makes up rumors about everyone. I just felt bad not giving her a ride that day. Anyways, the school parking lot was complete ice. She got out of my car and fell, we kinda laughed for a second and I helped her back up. Then I slipped and fell backwards and I layed there laughing until I realized something. She yelled "put your wig back on!" As soon as I looked behind me I saw it laying three feet away from me and in that moment I felt froze , I grabbed it and put it back on my head faster than anything I've ever done. I looked around and realized all of the students walking into school late and all around us and I wanted to just crawl into a ball and hide. I made her promise not to tell anyone, but I'm sure she already has. As soon as I got into school, late of course, I sat down and this girl looked at me and then her friend and they both cracked up. I tried to concentrate on my work but I just had a feeling they saw or someone got it on video. My teacher asked me if everything was ok, I guess she could tell I wanted to cry. I usually tell her everything, I wish I could have told her or someone about what happened but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. It was the most embarrassed I've ever felt. Now every time someone looks at me I feel like I'm being laughed at. Am I just overreacting? I'm honestly afraid to go to school because it very well could happen again...
   
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Re: Something really embarrassing happened.. - January 15th 2017, 03:54 AM

Hey,

It sucks something like this happened and it's understandable that you are embarrassed about it. I think anyone in your position would be embarrassed. Firstly, are you able to see a professional to cut your hair, or even someone who is able to cut it for you that is good at it? It's tricky to cut hair yourself as you found out and it's always easier for another person to do it to you. Even getting a parent to cut it for you is good if you would be willing to let them and they would be willing to do it. Of course a professional is the best option, but sometimes those are harder to get and afford.

To deal with your wig even falling off, are you able to pin it down with bobby pins so it can't move if you haven't already had that idea? I know someone who had to wear a wig for a while and they just used pins to keep it on her head so it couldn't move as easily as if it wasn't pinned down. It might also help calm your fears of it happening again if the wig can't move. Although people already suspect you of wearing a wig, it isn't that big a deal to wear a wig anyway and people have different reasons for wearing wigs. Seeing as people most likely don't know your reason, they can't exactly make a big deal out of it anyway.

Not going to school out of fear isn't a good plan, I know what's it like to not want to school because of something embarrassing happening, but not going to school didn't help me or my nerves. In fact the only way that I could get over it was going back to school again, and everyone had basically forgotten about it anyway. Rumours and stories that are spread round the school do not normally last long anyway and if something happens one day, by the next day people could have already forgotten about it. If it isn't over by the next day, then by the next week it really should have. If anything, the accident would have been most embarrassing to you and not many other people would even care about it. It's understandable to be worried about it, but not that many people would even be concerned about what happens to another person. As what happened to you was at the end of the week as well, people probably would have forgotten about it if they did see.

That girl who you gave a lift to doesn't exactly seem to be the nicest person in the world and I would also be worried that she would be spreading rumours about you. In fact, she might do that but the thing is, when people spread rumours it normally gets told to a person and they'll forget it pretty fast. I know I've been told things about people that weren't true, or even were true but would have been embarrassing for that person, and even though I know I've been told things, I still have no idea what those things were. Ignoring her is always a good idea, and even though it will be hard, try and ignore the thoughts that people are judging you because most likely, they aren't.

I hope it all goes well and everything blows over pretty fast. Take care.


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Re: Something really embarrassing happened.. - January 15th 2017, 03:57 AM

Ugh, people are the worst. No, you're not overreacting, your feelings are very valid.

The most important thing for you to remember is that, despite how you feel now and what people say/are gonna say about it, in 10 years this will just be a story you can look back on and laugh about.
We all make mistakes and I'm sorry you have to live with this.

Have you thought about maybe going to get your hair done and see if they can fix it? I don't know how badly it's cut, but there are some really pretty and cool styles there are that are SPECIFICALLY uneven. I have a friend whose hair caught on fire a few years back, so now it's uneven as she's never got it cut to the same length. It actually looks really cute on her now, and is just a funny story she can tell people.
You could also get extensions done at a salon, though I'm not sure about the expense or anything.

Another suggestion I have is wearing a hat instead of a wig, which comes with risk, though, because there are so many asshole kids who will whack off my hats all the time. But that might be a better alternative than a wig, because yeah, wigs are kinda obvious looking.

You're 17, you should be almost done with school by now. It sucks so bad that you have to go through this now, but just try and focus on when it'll all be over and you'll never see any of these people again.
The truth is, kids are going to make fun of other kids for literally anything they can find, even if it's not that bad a thing in the first place. Hell, I wore a beanie nearly every day during junior year, and everyone called me "cancer kid", because I tucked my hair completely under the beanie. Nobody will stop to consider the consequences of their words. Just because being known as the cancer kid didn't hurt me in the slightest, what if I really did have cancer?
But see, absolutely no one will stop and consider how much their words and actions really hurt other people.

All I can say is, just power through this. Do whatever you need to do to your hair to make it presentable. Hell, maybe just rock your hair the way it is. Own it. If you're confident, they can't touch you. I promise things will be okay, you just gotta get through it.

Best of luck to you!


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