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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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whispers on skype... - February 4th 2009, 03:58 PM

I thought these people were my friends but I was on skype talking to someone and I heard whispering. The other two were whispering about me. I really don't know why (they talk about me) so I just brushed it off when honestly I wanted to just go to sleep.

I was severely bullied in the 8th grade and in therapy for it. My so called best friend started a disgusting rumor about me and everyone followed so on Skype, I was triggered. I thought I knew who I was talking to, turns out I had no clue.

I know rumors are spreading as I type this. Yes they're people on TH. Disappointing. Is this a form of bullying? online, right?
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 4th 2009, 06:57 PM

Hm, yeah, it'd be online bullying I suppose. There are so many lines between phone, online, 'real life' and the like.

Why don't you confront these people calmly about it? Tell them you heard them and are quite upset, and if there are rumors going around you'd like them to be cleared up. Otherwise they may not be worth talking to anymore.



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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 4th 2009, 07:25 PM

I've been ignoring them today...well I have no choice. I did PM them. I haven't seen them all day though which I guess is a good thing.
They know I heard them they don't care. They like putting me down.
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 4th 2009, 07:50 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TibbySkye View Post
I've been ignoring them today...well I have no choice. I did PM them. I haven't seen them all day though which I guess is a good thing.
They know I heard them they don't care. They like putting me down.
anyone who likes putting you down is not worth your time Tibby. you deserve to have people around you who care about you, not people who are gunna make you feel bad.


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Re: whispers on skype... - February 4th 2009, 09:07 PM

I completely agree. Life is so short. Surround yourself with people that will only bring you up. If these people are simply taking you down any chance you get and then show no remorse. I think it's time to find better friends. Friends that are worth your time. :] Take care, yea? You deserve better.


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Re: whispers on skype... - February 4th 2009, 09:25 PM

That's so rotten. Let's be a little more careful about this, teenhelp...

Tibby, like Melissa said, you deserve to be around people you like you and care about you and not anyone who does you harm. Try to ignore them.. try really hard, ok?


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Re: whispers on skype... - February 4th 2009, 09:49 PM

Thank you everyone. I appreciate it. I'm trying my best to avoid them.
xoxo
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 4th 2009, 10:55 PM

hows everything going tibby?




   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 5th 2009, 03:12 AM

Well i dont think TH should take kindley to bullies, and in my opinion they shouldnt even be part of this forum if there going to act so imature

the same thing happend to me in my school some nasty rumor went around about me for about 2 years imature people who now have usless lives cause instead of doing there work they were more intrested in creating rumors and bullying me

so if i was you i would ignore if because bullies end up with nothing in there lives but fake friends and hate usally in the adult years whereas we have gone through life lessons from an early age and we know who's real and who isnt.
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 8th 2009, 12:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by desireedimples View Post
hows everything going tibby?
Better, thanks!!
Thanks Matt
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 8th 2009, 01:28 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by DistanceIsDarkness View Post
Well i dont think TH should take kindley to bullies, and in my opinion they shouldnt even be part of this forum if there going to act so imature

.
Just to make sure this is clarified..

Anything on the site, TH can take care of.

But anything off the site, like MSN/Skype conversations are ultimately out of our jurisdiction. Thankfully, those services have ignore/block features. TH obviously doesn't promote bullying, but we can't do anything about it outside of the site.
  Send a message via MSN to Pandamonium  
  (#12 (permalink)) Old
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 8th 2009, 03:24 AM

I know that's the crappiest rule too.
I know a couple of people who were harassed/bullied and no one did anything because of course it wasn't on TH, even thought both were members. Those people left, they didn't feel safe on here.
The things I hear make me sick tbh. Since I'm a member and not a mod, I'm trusted more, meaning I hear much more.
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 8th 2009, 03:58 AM

Crappy but necessary. We can't control IM messages. What do you suggest we do? We can't ban them because there is no evidence to do so, it is one word against another and the burden of proof lies with the prosecution. MSN Convos can be so easy manipulated it is untrue.

And you're popular so you hear a lot of things not because you're a member.
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 8th 2009, 04:49 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hyper Sonic View Post
Crappy but necessary. We can't control IM messages. What do you suggest we do? We can't ban them because there is no evidence to do so, it is one word against another and the burden of proof lies with the prosecution. MSN Convos can be so easy manipulated it is untrue.

And you're popular so you hear a lot of things not because you're a member.
Yeah, I guess that's true.
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 8th 2009, 10:57 AM

That sucks Tibby it really does. But most people who bully are insecure themselves. So try to look at it as though they are just jealous of you. And are showing it in a rather immature way.

But as some of the others have said there is nothing TH can do. If it outside of this site.


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Re: whispers on skype... - February 8th 2009, 02:54 PM

I don't really think it's bullying. Everyone has opinions about other people and they weren't shoving it in your face, in fact it was only by chance that you found out as they obviously thought you couldn't hear.

I think bullying has to be a repeated thing, i.e more than once, telling someone that you don't like them once isn't bullying. And being heard saying that you don't like that person even less so.

However it still sucks. But you have to realise that you can't be liked by everyone, I know it's difficult but you have to just brush it off when people are rude to you unjustly or realise the error of your ways if they are rude to you justly. Those are the only two options available really, and you have to be the judge of their opinions.
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 9th 2009, 08:04 PM

I don't count this as bullying simply because it wasn't to your face nor repeatative. If they were talking behind your back but you heard it, that's bad luck on your part, it's just simple pointless gossiping.

I wouldn't expect TH to do anything about it because they have no right to. If it was on TH chat then that's different but if it was on MSN, skype, etc..., it's outside of the jurisdiction. Besides, you cant fairly ban someone for gossiping or saying something to you outside of where you go. That's like going to a school with your friend, then at the mall the friend talks behind your back but you hear it, then the principal suspends them for that. Fair? No.

I'd say just to ignore them. They weren't saying it to your face and using skype has that risk. It seems to me they gave their opinion of you without wanting you to hear but you did.
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 9th 2009, 08:41 PM

Ok so it was behind my back bullshit which would make them cowards.
Got it now.
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 10th 2009, 03:35 AM

like was said, ignore button=friend


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Re: whispers on skype... - February 10th 2009, 06:03 PM

yes. any form of of making u feel bad worthless and horrible or anything like that is bullying. online bullying is what u had a problem with
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 10th 2009, 06:49 PM

Just ignore it and just ignore them because if they were talking about you behind your back then they really can't be much of a friend so you shouldn't waste your time worrying and getting upset about it because they aren't worth it. There are plenty of nice, friendly people on TH that you could talk to instead of wasting your time with people who obviously aren't.
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 10th 2009, 08:56 PM

it doesn't matter anymore, they won.
   
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Re: whispers on skype... - February 10th 2009, 09:06 PM

The best way to deal with online bullies is to ignore them or block them from your MSN, skype etc.

If it's on TH, report it to a staff member, specifically a member of the disputes committee and they will handle it as they see fit. If it's off TH but TH members are involved, there's not much we can do.

I'm going to close this now. I don't think there's much else anyone can say without being repetitive. If anyone disagrees, feel free to PM.



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