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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
lostandalone Offline
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lower than crap - April 23rd 2010, 06:32 PM

Last week someone in my class took my clothes when I was in the shower after gym class. I had to walk thru the hallways to the office wearing just a towel. I went inbetween classes, so there wern't many ppl about but there were some.
Some taunted me, couple of guys tried to take the towel off, but i ran.

I had to wait in the office for almost 2 hours untill mum could come with clothes. My other clothes were eventually found...in a bathroom, in the toillet...pissed on. no one is admitting or saying who did it. I do have an idea who, there are two girls who been bullying me for a while. I stood up to one of them a little while ago and this must be her revenge.

I am so humiliated. What makes this worse is i have anxiety and have been previusly sexually assaulted. I have to triple my anxiety meds dose to get through the day. It is getting so hard to go to school. I see their sneers and stuff. I have started cutting again, which now i feel worse. Today I considered just taking the full bottle of meds. I feel like a piece of shit.




"Think of your life as a book, move forward, close one chapter and open another." Unknown

We give each other strength to make it through the darkness." Silverstein

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Re: lower than crap - April 23rd 2010, 10:31 PM

You just have to keep going. Keep standing up to those bullies, and they'll realise you won't take shit from them. If they slap you, punch them. If they tug your hair, pull their fucking hair out. Bullies are despicable and disgusting. What they did to you was beyond bullying, it's just horrible, and I hope you never have to go through anything like that again.
   
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Re: lower than crap - April 24th 2010, 12:24 AM

That is despicable and most definitely not acceptable in any way! In my opinion, I think you should tell a staff member at your school what is happening. Sometimes that just makes it worse, but it sounds like it's gotten intolerable for you. Sometimes you can't just ignore bullying. You need to tell someone.

While RainOnMe had some good advice, I don't think retaliating will help your situation. Rather, I believe that it will only encourage the bullies' behavior. Oftentimes, people bully others because they like to see how they react. By fighting back in that way, you will be doing just that -- reacting. Doing exactly what they want you to do.

What they did to you was beyond bullying. It was harassment. I understand that you are humiliated, but please understand that you are not in the wrong here. Do not punish yourself for something you had absolutely no control over. It's not your fault. Those people are pathetic. I also have anxiety, and I understand how traumatizing this must be for you. Getting through the day is bad enough without people giving you a hard time.

Take care of yourself, now. I hope things get better.
   
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Re: lower than crap - April 24th 2010, 05:03 AM

That was not just harassment. That was theft and vandalism of private property. That is a crime. Whoever is responsible needs to spend a couple nights in jail so they can learn their lesson in my opinion. Probably facing a cop or an administrator one of those bullies will crack. I know because a similar thing happened to me where someone stole the stuff out of my backpack and it was later found in one of the trash cans, also when I was 13.
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Re: lower than crap - April 24th 2010, 07:16 AM

Hmph, Thats no way to treat a lady... especially when your already hurt.Right now the best thing you could possibly do, is tell the teacher/staffmember who you have the most respect for, if you've got idiot teachers that can't do a thing. Then i suggest you let your rage take control. Only use that rage to force yourself to pick up the phone and tell the police. Remember the police get paid for this. So theres no chance that they're not going to do anything

That anxiety probably makes it very hard to stand up tall, tell me if you think you have the confidence and i can tell you what to do. but otherwise, just go to staff or authorities, see what they can do.



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Re: lower than crap - April 24th 2010, 01:09 PM

[font="Arial"][color="YellowGreen"][size="2"][b]
Quote:
Originally Posted by BullyPreventionScheme View Post
Hmph, Thats no way to treat a lady... especially when your already hurt.Right now the best thing you could possibly do, is tell the teacher/staffmember who you have the most respect for, if you've got idiot teachers that can't do a thing. Then i suggest you let your rage take control. Only use that rage to force yourself to pick up the phone and tell the police. Remember the police get paid for this. So theres no chance that they're not going to do anything

That anxiety probably makes it very hard to stand up tall, tell me if you think you have the confidence and i can tell you what to do. but otherwise, just go to staff or authorities, see what they can do.

Sounds about right.
   
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Re: lower than crap - April 24th 2010, 01:47 PM

Thanks for the support.

I have told a couple of teachers and the vice principal, but other than re-iterating the anti-bullying theme, this will be an unsolved mystery.

However, a teacher or staff does stay in the change room untill everyone is gone now. Which helps, but I have skipped taking the shower this week.

The thought of retaliating is appealing but I'm chicken shit and they will come back with something worse. I would be totally outnumbered, i would be taking on thier whole gang, which is somthing like 10 ppl (mixed)

I know now that i dont have any real freinds. I am trying to deal with the anxiety but its hard. The meds and cutting just makes me more ashamed . I just dont know what to do anymore. I feel dirty.




"Think of your life as a book, move forward, close one chapter and open another." Unknown

We give each other strength to make it through the darkness." Silverstein

‎"Life is the art of drawing without an eraser." John W. Gardner

"It is never too late to be what you might have been." George Eliot

Every human life is worth the same, and worth saving." J.K. Rowling
   
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Re: lower than crap - April 24th 2010, 01:56 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by lostandalone View Post
Thanks for the support.

I have told a couple of teachers and the vice principal, but other than re-iterating the anti-bullying theme, this will be an unsolved mystery.

However, a teacher or staff does stay in the change room untill everyone is gone now. Which helps, but I have skipped taking the shower this week.

The thought of retaliating is appealing but I'm chicken shit and they will come back with something worse. I would be totally outnumbered, i would be taking on thier whole gang, which is somthing like 10 ppl (mixed)

I know now that i dont have any real freinds. I am trying to deal with the anxiety but its hard. The meds and cutting just makes me more ashamed . I just dont know what to do anymore. I feel dirty.
It's going to be hard, but if you let them push you around, they will. Sorry, but that's just how it is
   
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Re: lower than crap - April 24th 2010, 07:44 PM

Seeing a teacher about it... really depends on the school itself. Schools have a "duty", ok... but some still don't give a shit. Depends what your school is like. Depends also how many bullies there are... but from my experience there's always the "main one". If there's little way out and you are going to get in a fight... u just gotta pull that inner anger out of you and go for it, and do it with the "main one".

"Tell a teacher" is a nice theory... but it doesn't entirely solve the problem. It just puts a straight jacket on it.
   
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Re: lower than crap - April 26th 2010, 05:50 AM

Well first of all your right, violence will elevate the problem.
Hrmm, i think, perhaps you should try to think of something to make you happy, give your self a crazy dream and go for it. Give yourself something to live for.

And if there are no people at your school who are "real" friends, then go looking for people online, afterall your just unlucky that you didn't meet the right people, so just go looking for them!
Go on a quest to make yourself happy!


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Re: lower than crap - April 27th 2010, 06:29 PM

I am just so tired of being alone and dealing with this. Not sure how to be happy any more. My emotions are all over the place. I go from being afraid to wanting to take a bat to heads. ( or turn my blade on them)

argh. idk. It's so hard, I have to fight the anxiety, then fight them, then fight their gang...oh then their brothers/sisters will get in on it too, I expect.

Crazy dream? Well, kinda thought being a Helicopter pilot would be cool.

idk, just so indecisive.




"Think of your life as a book, move forward, close one chapter and open another." Unknown

We give each other strength to make it through the darkness." Silverstein

‎"Life is the art of drawing without an eraser." John W. Gardner

"It is never too late to be what you might have been." George Eliot

Every human life is worth the same, and worth saving." J.K. Rowling
   
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Re: lower than crap - April 29th 2010, 02:25 AM

Act like you don't give a shit in front of them, don't retaliate. I don't mean jsut stand there if they grab you just walk away.

Just laugh at how pathetic they are.

You are so much better than them don't let them win.

Be strong. And hang in there.





   
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Re: lower than crap - April 29th 2010, 07:31 AM

hmmm its strange actually, I think i know the main reason this happened in the first place. Read the thread I just made ("today i learnt a valuable lesson")

My guess is the only reason this happened is because you didn't have eye contact with them, bullies will always take an oppertunity to do something when your not looking at them. Hehheheh, i must admit, eye contact is a bully's greatest weakness.

Anxiety must hurt like hell. And theres only one one way i can possibly help with that. So do you want to talk on msn, I'm always happy to chat ^^ (that means i want you to say yes)

And if becoming a helicopter pilot is what you want be.. then... *air punches* GO FOR IT!!! ^^


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Re: lower than crap - April 29th 2010, 08:17 AM

i have anxiety problems with school i hate going but i know i have to go just keep going and don't let anyone push you around.
   
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Re: lower than crap - April 30th 2010, 07:06 PM

I really appreciate you guys support.
They really are a bunch of pathetic people. Only being happy when picking on somone.

Thats interesting about the eye contact. I con see how some may back down after being "stared down", but there are some who may take it as an invitation for a fight. I guess, in a way, I wouldn't be willing to look in their eyes unless I was ready for a fight anyway.

It's just so totally unfair. I have enough "inner deamonds" and self-doubt without them.




"Think of your life as a book, move forward, close one chapter and open another." Unknown

We give each other strength to make it through the darkness." Silverstein

‎"Life is the art of drawing without an eraser." John W. Gardner

"It is never too late to be what you might have been." George Eliot

Every human life is worth the same, and worth saving." J.K. Rowling
   
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Re: lower than crap - May 2nd 2010, 12:42 PM

Well to be honnest alot of people think that looking into a bullies eyes will lead to a fight, Though i never do it in a way thats threating, i just look in their eyes as a polite way of talking, i just try to look composed and happy.

no ones ever tried to fight me before, I think you only ever get caught in a fight if you insult a bully, (because then they're peer pressured by their mates and forced to hurt you, its not in a bully's nature to get crap, and not retaliate) and then attack them back.

Don't worry though, through each and every post your learning more and more about anti-bullying, as long as you keep picking yourself up again, everytime your hurt. You will eventually know enough to completely stop bullies in their tracks.

^^ Keep it up Erika, your going to defeat them soon!


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