Thoughts that are scaring me!

[writer4ever818]

So I'm a bully victim. people are so mean to me every day for no reason. According to them, I'm fat, ugly, worthless, stinky, and b*tchy. I don't understand. I've never even spoken to these people. I don't even know their last names!
I hear a lot about bully victims who commit suicide. I always said that I'd never do that because I couldn't bring myself to do it. But this morning, my mom practically called me fat and told me I stink to. I try not to. Sometimes, she's just as bad as bullies, but in a nicer way. I was thinking all day about what to do if I commited suicide. I thought of easier ways to do it. I thought of writing letters to all the people who brought me to kill myself, and all the people who kept me alive as long as I did.
I can't do it. I can't commit suicide. I haven't told anyone about these thoughts, because I'm afraid. I don't want to kill myself. I'm a strong Christian, so sometimes, I think that if I get away from Earth and these terrible people that I can just go be with the Lord. But I also know I can't just abandon life. I was given life for a reason.
I honestly don't know what I'm thinking. I can't say if I want to do it or not really. There's things keeping me from doing it and things making me want to. Most likely, I'll abandon the thoughts of suicide, but I just don't know how to deal with life.

[FlyingTrue]

They are doing it because they are cowards trying to make themselves feel powerful and superior. They are as, that is all they are.

Don't feel bad because you are feeling this way because I had been bullied heavily in the past for no reason and I too became heavily depressed from it and had suicidal thoughts sometimes.

I think you should try talking about this with a school counselor if possible. He/she might be able to give you advice about coping or some good comebacks to their insults.

[BullyPreventionScheme]

well firstly alot of parents tend to be complete bastards... or at least thats my oppinion.

Okey, the most likely reason your getting bullied by people you don't know, is because they're looking for mentally weak people. Think for a moment about how you are at school. Alot of victims of bullies become victims because they walk around looking at the ground being very sad and defensive. this makes you a target, how you should walk around is:
by holding your head high
keeping your back straight
and putting a smile on your face (don't let anyone wipe it off no matter what)

This unerves bullies as they aim for the weak, look strong, and they won't both you (i'm not saying, walk up and directly insult them, just as you walk past look happy and confident)

Its likely that now they've insulted you before, peer pressure will force them to do it again. When they do just wave to them and say hi with a smile on your face. Being iggnorant with bullies works better than using smart-arse answers.

Well you can say hi or you can just laugh at it, it doesn't really matter what as long as your not insulting the bullies and as long as you look happy.

if you successfully show them that bullying makes you happy a few times, they will stop.

[*~Circus Clown~*]

Hey there.

First of all, Welcome to Teen Help!

Now, I just want to tell you how sorry I am that these bullies are treating you this way. Its not fair to you, as you said, you don't even now them. I have a few ideas for you, but in the end its up to you if you want to do them.

1) Talk to a school counselor. Even if you don't mention the names of these bullies, having someone right at school to go to when you get upset might help you. Also, you should tell him/her about the suicidal thoughts your having. Feel free to tell him that your christian and don't really want to do it, you just don't understand why you're thinking that way.

2) Bullies thrive off those they feel they can control. If you show them that what they say to you has no effect on you, they will get bored and move on. Now truthfully, this isn't easy. Because you and I both know that ignoring hurtful words is very hard to do. The thing is, if they can make you cry, or make you sad, they won't stop. Bullies love control. I'm not telling you to fight them or insult them to prove you have control. Have you ever heard of taking the high road? Rising above their behavior. Don't act superior, because that will just make them mad. Just act like, your not going to sink to their level. Smile when they insult you, even try to look them in the eyes. It'll totally freak them out.

3) Talk to your parents. Personally, this may not be the best idea. However, if you can talk to your mom and explain how what she is saying makes you feel, I think that would be a good idea. I'd recommend doing it in a letter. Its much better to have a thoughtful, planned out letter to give her then just talking and trying to come up with things on a whim. If you do tell your mom about the bullies, she may very likely call the school. Doing this, will in turn show the bullies how upset you really are with them. They won't stop.

Suicide is permenant. There is no going back. And since you are religious, sweetie, suicide is a mortal sin. Its unforgivable. Now, I guess that depends on what religion you are. Thats just my personal belief. I know sometime it seems like it might be an easy out. And, you kinda wanna make all those bullies feel horrible for what they've done to you. But, in the end, it may or may not effect them. Truthfully, you will hurt those who love you more then you will hurt the bullies. Its horrible, I know, but suicide isn't the right choice. It never is. You can get through this. You just have to put your eyes on the light at the end of the tunnel and don't let anything stop you.

I'm here anytime if you need me to talk about anything. I really would love to help more, so just let me know.
Take care sweetie. Keep your head up.

[writer4ever818]

thanks. and this doesn't happen every day- like today, I had a good day. Just some days, I feel really lousy. I tried talking to a counselor, but that doesn't seem to help. I'll try anything though but I don't want to commit suicide. I just have those thoughts sometimes

[BabyIndia]

Hey there.

Firstly if you kill your self your lowering yourslf to their level, and you are so much better than them.

If you feel like you can't talk to anyone write it down. That way it's all out.

Ignore them, act happy when you see them, if you have to cry, or be upset do it where they can't see.

Bullies 9 times out of 10 have been bullied, and want to feel superior. Some their parents abuse them/ or the parents don't care about them, or tell the kid to toughen up( the child then thinks they have to become a bully). Sometimes they are scared of being a victim that they turn to bullying, it's also caused by what crowd they are with.
Some bullies bully people because they are jeleous of the person they are bullying.

I said in another post, if you do feel like saying stuff back just say things like " your making me famous talking about me all the time" or " your lives must be boring if all you have to talk about is me"
One of the ways I found that works to piss them off is laugh at them. If they say oh your a bitch just laugh and say yep. They hate it, and will back of eventually.

Please don't suffer in silence, try to speak to someone if not write a letter.
You are so much better than those stupid bullies.
And you are worth 10 of them.