Triggering (Grieving): I've felt cyberbullying, insults, and sometimes even physical bullying.

[Nav. T]

I am being bullied by peers in my school. One of them called me "lesbigay" on facebook. One of them tried to trip me two times before I told on her. This one boy kept calling me little boy. So there are all the types that I have been bullied by, and I was wondering what I could do. I have thought of killing myself, but is that just because I have depression?

Is it just me, or do I have no friends? I am a girl, and even though this might not sound like much, it means a lot to me. I didn't want to report the girl who said I was lesbigay, I didn't want to tell on the girl who tripped me, and the boy who kept smiling at me while he said I was a boy it hurt. These are just a few bullying situations I've been in.

I know I'm a girl. But other people, other forces make me believe I'm a boy. I believe like I sound like one, and even look like one. In fact, I was wondering, why should I post to this if everybody thinks it's a hopeless situation? Please don't. If it's anything I've done to deserve this, it's being born.

In fourth grade I won the presidential, but after that I got depression and since the transition to middle school I have been bullied. I ponder two things: Would it be worth it if I killed myself, and if I can stay home from school because of bullies.

But home isn't a good place either. My brother isolates me, my dad has a bad temper, and my mother is crazy and doesn't understand. I don't understand!

I don't understand how to stop this, how to endure this, and I don't know how to live with this!

Please, with all my kindness or whatever you think, please respond.

[FlyingTrue]

Hello there,
As someone who has been heavily bullied, cyberbullied, and even assaulted on public school campuses with no end in sight (until I switched to online schooling), it seemed like there was no end in sight. As a result of the constant victimization I too felt heavily depressed and even had suicidal thoughts because I constantly felt like I never had anyone to care about me. Often times I don't know how I managed to live with this, it started around the same time it did for you and I too had no friends.

For me it didn't end until I completely removed myself from the problem environment, so perhaps in your case it would be best to transfer to a different school with a whole different student body, if possible. You are not alone here, and killing yourself would not be worth it because there are lots of ways to make the situation better that you may not have even thought of.

[*~Circus Clown~*]

Hi hun,

I'm so sorry your going through this. It isn't easy, I know. I've never been in the same situation, but something similar so I know how hard it is to feel like there is just no hope. But there really is.

First off. Suicide isn't an option, okay? Lets just mentally throw that one out. Suicide is extreme and not needed in ANY situation. You can get through this and be a stronger person then you were before. "What does not kill you only makes you stronger." Its true hun, you get through this and you've been through more then many other people.

Now, as flying has said, removing yourself may be the best option. Unfortunately, bullies can latch on like leeches. Clinging to you until they break you. And no one here wants to see that happen. Switching school might be the best option. However, you're going to need to give the principal, your teachers and your parents the reasons why you want to switch. They might make it really hard for you. But I think if you keep pushing the fact that you want to switch, it just might happen. Also, you may want to tell your parents or teachers about your suicidal thoughts. One, because it will show them how much this bullying is really effecting you. Two, because no one as young as you should want to end their life. I strongly recommend talking to a school counselor. Maybe that counselor can help you tell your parents.

Sweetie, hang in there. Its a long, hard road. And you have no reason to be on it. I'm so sorry that this is happening to you and I hope you do take our advice and get yourself some help. You can overcome this. Take care of yourself and keep your head up and your feet firm on the ground.

PM me whenever you want.

[Nav. T]

Thanks for the advice... I also seem to have this psychotic disorder too. I don't want support.... I think it's stupid and weak. I don't even know why I came here. Perhaps I'll seek better advice.

I wanted answers. All I wanted to be like was to be like my brother, strong, happy, and smart. I wanted to be admired. People laugh at me... but I am going to another school next year, and it's almost the school year end. Now it's a matter of survival. To tell you the truth, if you were to convince, it's probably by reasoning, like always.

I hate to cry. My dad was screaming about my brother, hitting him, laughing at him. Screaming, hitting, laughing at my role model who never talks to me since an argument. I remember talking to my mom, and she should know what I'm through. She just says to stop crying. That's it! My cousin made me depressed to think she wanted to leave me. She did try reasoning with me, but in the end, she just stopped talking to me but she also called her husband over for lunch. My brother ignores me when I cry, and my dad seems to get tired of me whenever I go to him for support.

There is another belief that I'm not sure is good for me: Whatever is good has to be done with reason, whatever's bad you can want to be done. It makes me believe that everything good I do is with reason, everything bad doesn't have to be. Like this: Say if I were to stomp on somebody's phone, let's say, a teacher's. Bad thing do to. Why would I do that if I knew the consequences? Because I simply wanted to. If I were to buy a new phone for the poor and angry teacher, it would be for (or because of) the teacher. Am I right?

At one time I didn't want to take the pills because of the truth: We all die. Nobody lives for -ever, right? So why didn't I just stab a knife to my heart? Because of fourth grade. Fourth grade was my "golden age" and it'll probably be the only one if I keep getting depressed. That was, and still is my goal. Achieve the golden age. Achieve a goal. Be admired. More like be a boy. In reality, that's not going to happen right now. I am called a boy because of my hair (so I look like one) and my voice so I sound like one boy. But I take hormone pills or something like that and today I just went to the ENT doctor, whatever that is. I now must go to a speech specialist. I don't know what to do about my hair.

Please keep reading. I think everybody needs to have a motivation or a goal. Without that, you mentally go crazy and probably commit suicide. Let's say you have both, and let's say there are two situations: 1. One mere, poor kid who has no home, parents, or love. Guess what? They have a goal to become "normal" and motivation because they've felt no motivation. So you have both. But you want to die because you can't accomplish that goal, don't have any motivation. I know it's sad. Let's move on to situation no 2. Let's say you (yes you!) have a trillion dollars (unbelievable, right?) a billion euros, and 12 million francs. Please PM me if you think this is insulting to Bill Gates. THIS IS JUST AN EXAMPLE. Please don't make me worse than I already feel, but I sincerely apologize to Bill Gates for any harm done by this. You have a lot, but.... you can't avoid the inevitable. Even I die. My parents die, brother dies, and students die. I know this is long. I have kept this bottled up so long, for those who are still reading, you have my respect.

I do have one friend. No friends at school. I mean, not all of them are bullies, but most of them are influenced by the bullies to do isolate me. The friend I play with is younger than me and is our neighbor. Enough said.

Sincerely, Navarre TU.

[BabyIndia]

Hey there, I was bullied for years and years, from primary right up until I secondry. Don't let them know they are getting to you, they like weak people, if you have to cry over what they have done, do it where only you can see ( yousaid your parents don't really care when you cry) Don't retallite, ignore them they don't like it when they don't get anything back of the person they are bullying. If they trip you up, just laugh, I know it's hard I've been there and it's not easy. But why should you have to stop going to classes or going to school because of someone else? YOU have the right to an education.

Just please don't let them see that they are getting to you, because that is what they want. Act like you don't care around them, eventually they will give up.

You should talk to a teacher, tell them you want it all logging down as it's making you feel horrible, the teacher can't tell the bullies you have said anything, and the teacher will and should be able to get them on there own and sort them out without mention you going to them.

If theres anything you'd like to chat about, I'm nearly always online.

[Nav. T]

Good point. My brain is like "bad" glue, though. It sticks to all the bad stuff and just thinks about it. Pessimistic. So one insult sticks, hurts, and urges me to think of a good comeback. But you're right, I've been telling on kids one by one. In fact, I just told on one today. (whew)

I still don't understand why my family is so.... miserable. Today after school I was devastated because my dad doesn't like my brother. My dad also hates my mom, sometimes. My dad thought that my brother had removed a network on my laptop and screamed at my brother. I thought this was all my fault. My mother just looked at me when I was about to cry. Everybody said there was nothing to cry about, but I felt like I started it all. When my dad found out that my brother didn't delete the network, my dad tried to prove him wrong. When the two of them were face to face, in each other's person's space, I hit my dad. I thought it was the right thing because my dad is really stubborn. He seemed not to feel it. Already crying before that, I just wanted to be one with this family. Specifically, my brother. Did I take the right judgement? Did I do the wrong thing? I said sorry to my dad afterwards. Should I have taken my dad's side because I seemed to start this?

[BullyPreventionScheme]

wow, you know you may not know it but your actually a really strong person.
<--- see my avatar? thats Ace Rimmer, my idol a fictional character he may be, However he is admired by everyone, he's a hero, people say what a guy after talking to him.

Because its my goal too, to be admired by everyone around me, I want people to think "what a guy" I know how you feel.
...You certainly got guts, not many people aim for goals, have idols. *thumbs up* i respect that!

on topic though (btw i read to the end of the long post)
reporting bullies, i think you've got the right idea there! keep that up and see how that works, if your staff has a good 0 tollerance policy it'll work wonders...

To be honnest, i'm really impressed, i've never met anyone else with ambition as strong as yours, if anyone, you have real potential. Only people with goals can be whatever they want.

Sooo, wana be friends? I'd really love to get to know someone like you. ^^

[Dedalus]

Hey, first off EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK,

Look don't let what other people tell you about yourself get in the way of what you think about yourself. If you're a girl you're a girl. That is scientific fact. Nobody can take that away from you.

I'm guessing you're pretty young - early teens. Those are difficult years, I remember well. I think everyone will agree they're the hardest because thats when you find your place in the world.

Look, just don't worry about it. IT WILL EASE OFF. People bully to distract attention from themselves, everyone is insecure at those ages. That is the truth I can tell you in hindsight. You're just unfortunate enough to bear the brunt of it.

Don't kill yourself...and you know why? Because in a couple of years it will most definitely stop altogether. People mature. You'll have the time of your life in a couple of years.

If you don't believe me just remember that school is temporary, you will be leaving school and then that kind of bullying stops forever. People don't do those things after school.

YOU ARE JUST IN A TEMPORARY SITUATION. Its a shit one, but it will stop. Those people will stop of their own accord. YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING.

I had a shit family, but it gradually gets better. You learn to live with it.

Just talk to a teacher about it. Don't ask the teacher to stop it, just talk to him/her about it. Getting it off your chest will make you feel a whole lot better. You can ask them not to do anything about it, but just having someone know will makes things easier for you.

I hope it gets better for you love.

[Nav. T]

Thanks for all of the advice again. I really like this advice I'm getting. Thanks *again*

[FlyingTrue]

Seeking support does not make you weak. In fact, the desire to have support proves you have a strong personality. I used to be very pessimistic about things too when I was bullied a lot.

Considering the issues you mentioned in the home, it sounds like family counseling might help.

Lots of us here, myself included, see that you would be a good friend if we were to meet you in person. Just try to stay positive as much as possible.

[Dedalus]

Originally Posted by Nav. T

Thanks for all of the advice again. I really like this advice I'm getting. Thanks *again*

I'm sorry I can't offer you advice on how to make it stop. I really am. I just don't know how to. But I just want to stress to you that you're in a very temporary position. This will most definitely stop and I think half of it is you getting stressed about it.

I promise you these things:

It will ease off as you get older
It will eventually stop
You will not have to be around these people for the rest of your life so its temporary
As you get older you really won't care as much about it - both your family and bullying



Just try and keep those things in sight. Don't view it as forever. Once you go to university or start work life gets a hell of a lot better. School is shit. I hated school.