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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Unhappy Teasing and such... - September 27th 2010, 02:36 AM

I don't know how to deal with life sometimes, and I need help.
The people I know at school are too much for me. They gossip, swear, and tease. I hate it. I hate it so freakin' much!
1. Almost all the girls at my school are self-involved. They talk about boys, clothes, gossip, and always come to school with a buttload of make-up with their hair "straightened, or curled to perfection" I am scared to talk to them and stuff because, well, they all sound SO STUPID!
I need help dealing with this!!!
Also;
A few days ago, 2 boys in my French class were "Whispering". Yeah, whispering just loud enough so I could here them. We were giving presentations and we all had to stand at the front of the class. So it's bad enough that me, this horribly shy person, has to stand up there and talk, IN FRENCH, and then these two guys are snickering and making snide comments! I answered a question wrong and they started commenting, saying, "What the hell? That was such an easy question!" and laughing quietly to themselves. THE TEACHER DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE!!!
Then, when a few girls were presenting, one of these boys made such a rude comment about one of the girl's breasts, my face got so red. This girl was actually very nice, and they just start saying the meanest things.
So finally, while we were working in partners practicing our words orally, I told them that they were acting so stupid. They told the teacher what I said and she asked me my side of the story. I told her that I overheard them making rude comments about people and she told them that they to not do it again. Yeah, like that totally helps.
The problem is that whenever I get called on, teased, or whatever, my face gets red, and I start to choke up so much that I have trouble breathing and it's hard to talk. I feel like crying.
What the heck do I do????
* Also, its bad enough that I like to collect dolls. If anyone ever found out, my life would be over.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Teasing and such... - September 27th 2010, 03:16 AM

Hey Emily.

I'm sure there's at least one other girl at your school who isn't completey superficial. I know it's tough when you see the other girls acting so stupid, but try and remember they have issues too.
I'm sorry. They're idiots, ignore them. They're really not worth your time or energy.

You seem very mature, and kind. Don't let the negative people bring you down. It will get better, trust me.


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I'd give all I have, honey. - If you could stay like that.
Stay this little. - - I won't let nobody hurt you.
Just try to never grow up. - - Never grow up.
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Teasing and such... - September 27th 2010, 03:20 AM

Thanks,
I guess they all aren't, but it sure seems like that...
I'll try and remember that next French class.
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - September 27th 2010, 10:56 AM

Ehh... the French. Haha I'm sorry, I just have a 100 year grudge with them. Anyway I'm sure there is at least one girl there who isn't ignorant, superficial, and whoreish. Trust me, there's a friend out there for you. Also, about those guys, just ignore them, men who don't respect women are some of the lowest people in my opinion. If you ever need any help or just want to talk send me a message. ^__^


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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Teasing and such... - September 27th 2010, 02:08 PM

Believe it or not there are alot of girls out there who aren't superficial but unfortunatly wherever you go in life you will find people like that, thats a way of life. But being as kind and lovely as you are you'll soon meet new people like you and you'll make friends their the people to stick by. Keep your head held high, teasing someone and making rude comments only shows how immature and boys are, and girls too. Just try your best to ignore them, if they get worse talk to one of your parents or talk to a teacher in private so that more gets done to prevent it.
Try not to let it get you down, people only tease to make themselves feel better about themselves or look cool infront of their friends.
But trust me, they don't look cool.
PM if you need to talk or just want a chat hope everything goes okay x


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Re: Teasing and such... - September 28th 2010, 12:10 AM

Thanks, everyone.
Yeah, I guess there are more girls out there that aren't, er....
Anyways, I have French tomorrow, so, I will see how that goes. If those boys are still being rude and disrespectful... well, I'll just have to get help.
And again, thanks. I just needed some reassuring I guess!
Emily
n_n
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - September 28th 2010, 11:53 AM

And by the way, there's nothing wrong with collecting dolls I still have all my pokemon cards.


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  (#8 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Teasing and such... - September 29th 2010, 02:49 AM

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Originally Posted by Guile View Post
And by the way, there's nothing wrong with collecting dolls I still have all my pokemon cards.
Thanks, that made me feel better.
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - September 29th 2010, 06:53 PM

Hey Emily

Am I too late to respond to this?

but anyway I just wanted to say, you shouldn't let them get to you. It really hurts when you know someone is whispering about you but unfortunately we just have to live with it.

Teachers often prove unhelpful in these situations and after a while of reporting it, it just becomes a chore and we get fed up of doing it.

I think just keep your head down, and don't it bother you.. it'll just fuel the fire even more if you react

Always here if you wanna talk <3




   
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Re: Teasing and such... - September 30th 2010, 01:24 AM

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Originally Posted by RainbowSkies View Post
Hey Emily

Am I too late to respond to this?

but anyway I just wanted to say, you shouldn't let them get to you. It really hurts when you know someone is whispering about you but unfortunately we just have to live with it.

Teachers often prove unhelpful in these situations and after a while of reporting it, it just becomes a chore and we get fed up of doing it.

I think just keep your head down, and don't it bother you.. it'll just fuel the fire even more if you react

Always here if you wanna talk <3
Thats sounds like a good idea, thanks.
She changed our "seating plan" so I don't have to sit with them anymore!
Which means that now I won't be able to hear them and then I won't get hurt feelings again.
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - September 30th 2010, 02:11 AM

Stay strong Emily!
I love that you haven't conformed to what everyone else is and is doing! That is awesome! The reason why they say comments and laugh is because you are YOU and you are not following the crowd...you are actually being a Leader and being a Leader can be a very lonely title sometimes. Don't give in and good for you for sticking up for yourself...it doesn't matter that you turned red...you stood your ground and you should be very proud of yourself for doing that-that takes guts because some people would have just not said anything for fear of being teased more.
People who bully and tease are people with really low self esteem. and they take it out on other people because anyone that keeps to themselves or seem different are "originals" and intimidate the ones who follow the crowd.
I know its hard to imagine this but high school seems to be the worst for the bullying and teasing. But beyond high school...like when you become an adult...there is no such thing as "cool kids" or "losers"...those labels disappear and I can definitely say this for sure...the ones who were thought of as so called losers...were the more successful ones out of the "cool kids"...that is a fact!
Walk into that class tomorrow with your head held high...and just remember...whatever they say to you...is really what they are saying about themselves..its how low they feel about themselves or else they would be kind and respectful to you. People who don't respect themselves, disrespect people because if they respected themselves...they wouldn't have to make fun of other people...make sense?
I hope this helped cheer you up!
   
  (#12 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 1st 2010, 04:22 AM

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Originally Posted by teen spirit View Post
Stay strong Emily!
I love that you haven't conformed to what everyone else is and is doing! That is awesome! The reason why they say comments and laugh is because you are YOU and you are not following the crowd...you are actually being a Leader and being a Leader can be a very lonely title sometimes. Don't give in and good for you for sticking up for yourself...it doesn't matter that you turned red...you stood your ground and you should be very proud of yourself for doing that-that takes guts because some people would have just not said anything for fear of being teased more.
People who bully and tease are people with really low self esteem. and they take it out on other people because anyone that keeps to themselves or seem different are "originals" and intimidate the ones who follow the crowd.
I know its hard to imagine this but high school seems to be the worst for the bullying and teasing. But beyond high school...like when you become an adult...there is no such thing as "cool kids" or "losers"...those labels disappear and I can definitely say this for sure...the ones who were thought of as so called losers...were the more successful ones out of the "cool kids"...that is a fact!
Walk into that class tomorrow with your head held high...and just remember...whatever they say to you...is really what they are saying about themselves..its how low they feel about themselves or else they would be kind and respectful to you. People who don't respect themselves, disrespect people because if they respected themselves...they wouldn't have to make fun of other people...make sense?
I hope this helped cheer you up!
Wow, thanks!
That awesome advice and really made me feel better.
So, we had French today... anddddd... they were still being disrespectful.
BUT.
I stood my ground. I didn't say anything, and I focused on French. Whatever they said (even if I was in earshot), I didn't hear, because whatever they were talking about was their stupid business, and it was obviously not worth listening to. My face still turned red because I knew what they were talking about since it was pretty obvious, without actually hearing it. But I took a few deep breaths and that helped a lot.
I feel really proud of myself. Yay!
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 1st 2010, 06:09 AM

Hello Shutterbug!

If you like what you're doing then great, but there is something else you can try. The bullies aim is to make you uncomfortable because it gives them a feeling of power. They can see that you are uncomfortable through body language, that is why they keep doing it. In order to break through their game, simply repeat what they are saying in a confident voice. If you are not embarrassed they have no power over you.

Also, don't be scared to talk to other girls just because of what they look like or sound like. Oftentimes they feel pressured to go along with the crowd because they want to fit in and make friends. They don't want to be abandoned and isolated, so they are scared. Make up and hair can be fun if you find a style you like. If you feel intimdated by that sort of thing or are uncomfortable with it ask your parents if you can get a makeover. This may take some convincing so you could ask for it as a birthday present or simply find one of those photo studios that does everyone up before they take the photo, then say that you would really like it if everyone could have a nice family photo for christmas or similar.

Of course, if you don't like make up or certain hairstyles there is nothing wrong with that either.

Just a side note, my grandmother collects dolls and she must be in her eighties. So don't feel like you can't, there are actually plenty of people who do! Maybe not in your area, but there most definitely are people out there. Try looking for doll magazines online or at the newsagent and you will see what I mean.
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 3rd 2010, 02:16 AM

That is awesome Emily I'm proud of you toooo!


To you, everything's funny. - -
I'd give all I have, honey. - If you could stay like that.
Stay this little. - - I won't let nobody hurt you.
Just try to never grow up. - - Never grow up.
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 7th 2010, 12:22 AM

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That is awesome Emily I'm proud of you toooo!
Thanks!
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 14th 2010, 02:55 AM

What should you do? You should just ignore them. I know, I know its hard, trust me when I first started trying to ignore rude remarks people said about me, and the teasing and harassing and such, it was so hard for me to not get all nervous and choked up, but now it's easier, someone says something out of line I just ignore it, smile and keep walking. Remember no matter what you should hold your head up high and never let anyone think that your weak, because some people since that like a prey sense their predator. Second, if your giving a presentation, just do it for you, and no one else(trust me, I've done alot of them, and I'm a shy person too.)
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 14th 2010, 06:03 AM

...Ugh...sounds like a bunch of idiots to me. Do you WANT to be friends with them? Find a seemingly cold, sarcastic and anti-social person like me! (We generally are actually rather friendly to the nice people like you. )

The way I see it, normal girls (not women...girls) are completely concerned about social status whether it has to do with fashion, relationships etc.

And guys? ...weeell...in a polite manner of speaking the average male is just looking for some...love. -_____-
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 21st 2010, 01:32 AM

computer's dummb sorry
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 21st 2010, 01:32 AM

u should ignore them and i mean fight back
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 21st 2010, 01:33 AM

c how they would like ti if u say stuf about them
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 21st 2010, 01:33 AM

if it doesn't work message me
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 21st 2010, 01:34 AM

umm 24/7 i'll answer the next day prolly
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 21st 2010, 01:34 AM

also u can stand up to them
   
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Re: Teasing and such... - October 21st 2010, 01:35 AM

or tell on them to lke a teacher
   
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