Raising Self-Esteem. Help?

[Metal♥Lover]

One of my main goals for this year is to significantly raise my self-esteem, however, I'm not sure how to do that at all.
I was bullied all throughout the seventh grade, and that experience has, without a doubt, scarred me and significantly lowered my self-esteem, which, at the time, was already lower than what it should have been.
Now I'm in the eigth grade and I have an extremely difficult time talking to the other students at my school. I'm afraid that I will be shot down for anything I say because they might think it's 'weird'. Please don't tell me to ignore what they'd say, I've done that, or tried to, and it hasn't worked.

[AmazonQueen]

i know exactly how you feel! I suggest try something new find something that YOU love not what everyone else thinks you should do for me it's mixed martial arts which in its own is great to build your confidence and self esteem take up music or something that you feel you can be proud of...set small goals and reward yourself when you reach them when someone compliments you smile and say thanks even if you dont believe it one day you'll realized wow people say that alot it must be true lol believe that your different and THATS what makes you you! people don't like change and things they don't undertsand they probablly make fun of you because you are different which is a good thing remember even if they talk about you go or bad it doesn't matter because it's still all about you, practice eating right and being active it will make you FEEL better about yourself buy some new clothes and try something new at 13 this is your time to figure out what you like and want so go for it and dont let anyone tell you that you cant!

sorry if this sounds preechy hope it helps this is a wonderful goal to have

[facade]

I think that building your self esteem is a good goal.
Many good things can comes from achieving it.
One thing that can help you learn what to do is this weekend's Facilitated Discussion in the Chat Room.
It's Building Confidence and Self-Esteem.
I think that you might be able to benefit from going. :]

[Metal♥Lover]

JamieRage- Hey thanks. I'm not sure what I love to do, actually. I used to love writing and drawing, but now I can't draw anything and my writing has turned to shit. I honestly don't know where to start when it comes to finding something I love because all of the stuff at school takes place during the after school hours and I can't stay after school, reason being that I'd have no way home and my house is a loooonnnggg way from the school. I sound like I'm making excuses, but I'm not. And there's also no community stuff or anything like that to take part in at the town where I live. So I'm stuck.

Facade-I'll see about that conversation. I wonder when it is...

[MegaMadness]

Everyday tell yourself at least one positive thing about yourself, and slowly increase it into mire positives. It helps.

[AmazonQueen]

Originally Posted by Metal♥Lover

JamieRage- Hey thanks. I'm not sure what I love to do, actually. I used to love writing and drawing, but now I can't draw anything and my writing has turned to shit. I honestly don't know where to start when it comes to finding something I love because all of the stuff at school takes place during the after school hours and I can't stay after school, reason being that I'd have no way home and my house is a loooonnnggg way from the school. I sound like I'm making excuses, but I'm not. And there's also no community stuff or anything like that to take part in at the town where I live. So I'm stuck.

Facade-I'll see about that conversation. I wonder when it is...

im in the same situation
try knew things idk how else to help

[Ngikhona]

Since I think this thread is focused a bit more on asking for help with the goal than the goal itself, I'm going to move this to the Peer Pressure and Bullying forum.

[Opal]

Hey there.

Lots of different issues here, let's start with self esteem.

Self esteem is built through accomplishment, plain and simple. In order to accomplish something set a goal that you want to achieve and break it down into small steps, then reward yourself in some way every time you achieve a step. Having an overarching plan will remind you that every step you take is headed in the right direction, and even if you have a set back you still know what you have to do.

Bullying - Ignoring bullying does not work, and in fact, can make it even worse. The best thing to do is to do exactly the opposite of whatever the bully expects you to do.

The best way to build relationships is through shared interests. If you can't join a club maybe start a conversation in your favourite subject with someone else who seems to be really into that subject, or look at people's books for clues as to what they are interested in. Try to be relaxed when you do this as building friendships takes time.

[AmazonQueen]

oh for your location problem maybe try taking something up on your spare time and find a teacher or friend or family member and talk to them about it, to get yourself esteem up then gradually maybe START something im sure theres only people with the same dilema, start your own little club of some sort or try and find a ride

[Youth Pastor]

When I was in MS/HS I had a problem talking to peers because I was picked on also. I found Yahoo chat and started talking to people and it actually helped. One crazy thing is I still talk to a person on there and we met 12 years ago but we've never met. The point is sometimes talking online can help because we don't know each other, but some might on here.

[Illuminate]

Hi there...

I think that all of the advice given has been real good!
I would suggest just trying to talk to more people.
At first it is hard but you find that it really builds your confidence. Go out with friends and maybe ask them to introduce you to some people you have never met.

I think that, everytime you ever get called something horrible or picked on .. tell yourself 'I like me because...' and repeat it over and over in your head.

It really helps <3

[Release9]

Find people who have your interests.
I know what it feels like to be bullied. I have been bullied/teased every grade except the 2nd and 3rd grades.
It'll pass.
*hugs*

[tarrbear]

Something I like to do when my self-esteem is getting a little low is go shopping, not a big spending spree of anything like that, but just going out with a friend and finding like one or two pieces of clothing or accessories that make me feel awesome and that look good on me! Then next time I go somewhere public (like school) I wear what I bought so I feel confident in myself and looks.

I know it sounds silly, but it works for me when I need it lol.

[Heartlines.]

What you can do to raise your self esteem, is maybe join a club that fits your interests.
You can even start a club based on what you like. Clubs are great ways to make friends
and build confidence. Also, when you wake up in the morning, you can stand in front of
the mirror and say "I am beautiful". If you say this every day, you are bound to believe it.
Also, you can write down all the things you love about yourself, with the bare minimum of
15 things. The more good qualities you find in yourself, the more you believe that you are
a great person. Google is also a great place for one to look for tips to raise self esteem.

Hope I helped!
-Lyndsee

[Unicorn ♥✿]

Make a list of your best qualities and focus on how cool you are