Non-PG13 (Strong Language): How to ask parents if I can go to a different school?

[IMissYouGrant!]

I want to go to a different school, get a fresh start, meet new people. Everyone at this school has a pretty big hunch that I'm gay (though I'm really bi...)and besides the shit I take from that, everyone just hates me anyway because I used to always get in trouble because of my ADHD and everyone just hated me.

I have no idea how I'm going to convince my mom to let me go to a different school. This is probably the 5th best district in the state and the other ones are far away or hard to get in. There are other schools around here that are acceptable though.
On a side note I don't understand how this school is even in the top 100 in the state, literally 1/8th of the people I know here are in one of the "special" classes for kids who can't figure out "Find x; 2=x+1" or who can't read a chapter book. Not being mean to them, just making a point that this school is honestly pretty god damn stupid for being in the top 5 in the state.

So how could I tell my mom I want to go to a different school? I don't feel comfortable walking up to her and just asking "Can I go to a different school?".

[evans_x]

I hear posts like that and similar to that a lot. Where I come from, everyone is just accepting whether you're a nerd, have problems, are depressed, bi or gay, or any nationality.
Anyway to the point, it depends on how strict your mum is, my mum would let me if I asked to. I wouldn't have to give it much thought about how I would put it. Does your mum know you're bi? Does she know most kids don't like you?
Just put it simple, but give a reason as to why you want to move and state some points. You could do out a pro's and con's list and show her, majority wins.

I hope you get to move schools, everybody on this earth should just be accepting towards others, tough life

[Sea Monkey]

Hey there,

The best thing to do is tell your mum the exact problems you are experiencing at school. I'd suggest letting her know you're being bullied and go into detail about what's going on at school, which will make it easier for her to help you sort things out.

I'd suggest talking to a teacher you particularly get along with at school and they may be able to sort things out for you. This maybe an easier option than moving schools, but it is entirely your descision.

If you need anything at all, please feel free to PM me anytime, I'd be more than happy to help you out.

[OMFG!You'reActuallySmart!]

Before asking her, consider some of the problems you're experiencing and whether they'd be resolved by moving to another school. If people think you're gay at the current school, there's a good chance the same will occur at another school as your behaviours will be roughly the same. If you used to get in trouble from your ADHD, unless it's being managed, the same will happen at another school. Point is, if there are difficulties such as these, you're better off trying to deal with them as opposed to run to a different school where you may experience the same again.

I think you should approach your mother telling her of the problems but not right away about wanting to move to another school. Your mother would want to know why you want to leave the school anyway so you're going to have to tell her the reasons one way or another. Some of this depends on how much she currently knows and is willing to recognize. For example, if she has no idea on your sexual orientation, it may take some reasoning with her to explain it. Also, go to your guidance counselor and either take with him/her as well as get to know where other schools are. If they're far away, your mother may be less willing since there's going to be an issue of transportation.

If you can, get the guidance counselor or another teacher whom you've shared these details with and who has observed some of them, talk to your mother so they can be an "official" way of providing information.

If you haven't told your mother, one question she may ask is why didn't you say it sooner? I don't know your mother nor your situations in detail so you're going to have to explain that part to her, nobody here I think knows enough to give sound advice on that.

[IMissYouGrant!]

Originally Posted by WOW!USaidSomethingSmart!

Before asking her, consider some of the problems you're experiencing and whether they'd be resolved by moving to another school. If people think you're gay at the current school, there's a good chance the same will occur at another school as your behaviours will be roughly the same. If you used to get in trouble from your ADHD, unless it's being managed, the same will happen at another school. Point is, if there are difficulties such as these, you're better off trying to deal with them as opposed to run to a different school where you may experience the same again.

I think you should approach your mother telling her of the problems but not right away about wanting to move to another school. Your mother would want to know why you want to leave the school anyway so you're going to have to tell her the reasons one way or another. Some of this depends on how much she currently knows and is willing to recognize. For example, if she has no idea on your sexual orientation, it may take some reasoning with her to explain it. Also, go to your guidance counselor and either take with him/her as well as get to know where other schools are. If they're far away, your mother may be less willing since there's going to be an issue of transportation.

If you can, get the guidance counselor or another teacher whom you've shared these details with and who has observed some of them, talk to your mother so they can be an "official" way of providing information.

If you haven't told your mother, one question she may ask is why didn't you say it sooner? I don't know your mother nor your situations in detail so you're going to have to explain that part to her, nobody here I think knows enough to give sound advice on that.

Well there was only one boy I liked and he moved far away so it's not likely that's going to happen again. The only reason people know here is because apparently I always talk about him(not really any more than my couple other friends here). My ADHD seemed to resolve itself, I haven't had even a detention in 2 years, before that I got suspended A LOT.

Thanks everyone. I still don't know what to do. I probably still have 6 months before I need to switch schools to be in a different one before 9th grade. Fuck, when that kid moved he was in school the day after they were done getting boxes to the new house. I could probably still register in early September and get in.

WHAT THE FUCK I just found the top district in the state apparently is like 20 minutes away and has almost 10% better test scores than here. I think I have my new school.

[Sythan]

What state do you live in? The reason I ask is because certain states have laws that can protect you against Sexual Orientation Discrimination.

[IMissYouGrant!]

I just kinda said "I don't like this school" and I found a new one that my mom said "If you try as hard as you can in 9th grade you can go there in 10th." So there it is, I get a new school, 1.5 years off but better than never, right? And I live in Minnesota, what do those laws say? Like if a kid called me a 'fag' they could get fined or something?

[savealife723]

Hey there,

I went through the same thing about two years ago and I decided to ask my mom if I could transfer to a different school. At first, it was really hard for me and I was scared that she wouldn't let me. But once I explained my reasons for it and everything, she became a lot more open minded to it and actually considered it. I was switched within the next two weeeks.

I think that if you really want to get out of the school you're in, you need to be straightforward and just tell her that you want to switch. I think it's best to be honest and straightforward so that she knows you really want this and have thought about it a lot, which I hope you have.

I say just go for it and hope for the best. Give her reasons, and explanations.

Good luck!
-Kaylaaa.

[Sythan]

Originally Posted by IMissYouGrant!

I just kinda said "I don't like this school" and I found a new one that my mom said "If you try as hard as you can in 9th grade you can go there in 10th." So there it is, I get a new school, 1.5 years off but better than never, right? And I live in Minnesota, what do those laws say? Like if a kid called me a 'fag' they could get fined or something?

Ive been studying the LGBTQ Youth Community of Minnesota, I have found this website that I think might help you: www.dist202.org