Time for war

[I_am_third]

For those of you who don't want to read through the story: I need to become more comfortable with possibly violent confrontations so that I do not pretty much shut down. I need to have full control of myself so that I may defend myself and get out of that kind of situation.

Hello, I have a bit of a weird situation. So first off I'm a shy guy, I'm not used to confrontation, I'm not really confident too so I'm not very good with.....well people. So I go to a college that isn't very good. The area is slowly starting to get worse but there isn't a whole lot of crime yet. The school itself isn't that great either. There are all kinds of problems and things slip through the cracks all the time. So I took a class one semester and the teacher didn't really like me and I didn't like him. The class eventually ended and I thought I was done with him. A new semester begins I go to check my grade and I notice it's incomplete. I emailed my teacher and he emailed me back and it eventually came to the point where he wasn't out of line but he sent an incediary comment that was irrelevant. I show my parents to ask what they think and my Dad helps me send an email to my teacher that is assertive but respectful. I want to make it clear that at this point my teacher isn't out of line and I do not need to get the authorities involved as he has not done anything illegal. So I have not received a response from my teacher yet but it would be wise of me not to take this situation lightly. So I'm preparing for the worst case scenario anyway. This teacher is the head baseball coach at my school and I realize that it would be illegal for me to attack him or for him to do the same. To get to the point I dont think I should be concerned about the teacher so much as the baseball team. If the situation were to come to it the police would not be able to watch me at all times so I would need to fill in the gaps. It's ironic but I do have extensive martial arts experience but I'm very bad with confrontations so I may as well not have any experience in a real confrontation. Evidence of this was seen while I was merely composing the email I sent to my teacher with my Dad. Just at the thought of it made my eyes start watering, my lips starting quivering, I started shaking, I couldn't think straight. I need help to fix this. Quickly is possible. Please help.

I again want to make it clear that my teacher has not done anything illegal yet. There is no reason to believe that anything will happen and therefore there is no reason for me to contact the authorities. I am only being proactive and preparing for a hypothetical situation in which I would need to continuously deal with confrontation. There is no immediate danger but I would prefer to be prepared if something were to happen. Again my teacher has not done anything illegal.

[OMFG!You'reActuallySmart!]

Your professor hasn't done anything illegal yet you want to confront him in an aggressive manner that may involve violence, which of course would be illegal. However, if it's an assertive, non-violent discussion/confrontation with the professor, I fail to see how that involves the baseball team in any way. I cant imagine that being blunt and assertive would get the baseball team on your ass and if the teacher has a set of balls, he won't send his players on you as though they're his personal hit squad.

If none of this is what you're implying, then can you elaborate because you're beating around the bush.

You may find better luck by stepping over the teacher's head and going to higher-up administration as they are the ones who are responsible for doing all the paper-pushing. If you've completed the course and satisfied the requirements necessary to pass it, then skip the teacher and see the higher-ups. Any problems with the college is likely systemic, meaning you may see the problem at one place in the system (i.e. with your teacher) but that doesn't mean it is limited to just him. Go over his head and get the administration to resolve the issue. If you have another course with the teacher, assuming he has a set of balls and a decent head on his shoulders, he won't hold a grudge against you where the baseball team would be involved.

[I_am_third]

Previously in my post I said that I was just preparing for a hypothetical situation. There is no confirmation or reason to believe that violence will occur but again like I said I would rather be prepared than take the issue too lightly. Furthermore my school does not have the best kind of people. It's not a school of convicts but the moral character could be much better. So the baseball team could act on their own intentions even if the teacher were to tell them otherwise. Even if the situation were to be simply solved tomorrow and I never have to deal with the teacher again I would still appreciate anyone who could help me become more comfortable with confrontations so that I may defend myself. I have also considered asking the administration for help as my family knows a few high ranking members. This is only so that we may take action if we are forced to. I'm not asking for help about how I should deal with the teacher but rather how to mentally prepare for a violent confrontation if it were to come to that. Again nothing illegal has been done and I don't intend to do anything illegal unless in the case of defending myself in an emergency. I apologize for any confusion.

[OMFG!You'reActuallySmart!]

Originally Posted by I_am_third

Previously in my post I said that I was just preparing for a hypothetical situation. There is no confirmation or reason to believe that violence will occur but again like I said I would rather be prepared than take the issue too lightly. Furthermore my school does not have the best kind of people. It's not a school of convicts but the moral character could be much better. So the baseball team could act on their own intentions even if the teacher were to tell them otherwise. Even if the situation were to be simply solved tomorrow and I never have to deal with the teacher again I would still appreciate anyone who could help me become more comfortable with confrontations so that I may defend myself. I have also considered asking the administration for help as my family knows a few high ranking members. This is only so that we may take action if we are forced to. I'm not asking for help about how I should deal with the teacher but rather how to mentally prepare for a violent confrontation if it were to come to that. Again nothing illegal has been done and I don't intend to do anything illegal unless in the case of defending myself in an emergency. I apologize for any confusion.

In that case, if the all the members of the baseball team were to attack you, I don't think you could prepare for that, you'd be fucked in more ways than one. As for how to prepare for it, people use different methods but since you do martial arts, how do you prepare yourself when you're going to spar someone who you know is going to be a challenge? I realize it is not the same situation as potentially taking on a baseball team but you would have some experience through your sparring, even if it's not full-contact sparring.

When I go to spar against someone full-contact, I not only want to give hard hits, avoid theirs as much as possible but also control where they move. Hence, not backing down, keep pressuring them. I've always been taught when sparring, stare into your opponent's eyes, never look away and don't aim to punch/kick at, say, their ribcage, aim to punch/kick through it and for that time when you're sparring, the only thing you want is to win as though your life is on line. Some people may intentionally get themselves angry before a fight to increase the adrenaline, which I think works but be control of the anger, otherwise it's a brawl and your opponent may take you apart. Be both calm and aggressive, think of strategy. Suppose one the baseball players has an injured right knee. You're going to go for that knee but you may have to set it up by focusing on some other part of their body. Once you have the advantage, don't let up until you have to or are forced to, however, be conservative of your energy so don't get all pumped up for a violent confrontation and burn away lots of energy.

Be calm to avoid a fight but if one is to start, try to be calm, think strategy. Since it wouldn't be a fight monitored by a referee, it may get dirty so be prepared to do the same. For example, if someone punches you, instead of blocking, dodging or hitting back, grab the arm and play with the elbow or wrist. Close-contact can be ideal because in a group fight, if you have one of the opponents tightly secured, others may be hesitant to enter as they don't want to hit their own man.

The most important point though is be prepared to try to avoid a potential violent confrontation. Be calm on the outside, control your expressions and dialogue as much as possible. If you go in anticipating a fight, you may get one and I wouldn't want to take on a small group of guys armed with bats and possibly other weapons. I train in martial arts as well and sometimes teach some classes in street self-defense, anything from multiple attackers to knife-fights to standing joint locks that'll break bones to using a single sheet of paper (ideally 1 page from any magazine) to give a concussion and break the collarbone, to car keys aimed between the ribs, etc... . However, when it comes to fights, I'm not afraid of them, I try to avoid them as they can often be resolved in other ways that are less destructive. Even if I hate the person, I'll refrain as much as possible from hitting them.