Lunchroom troubles.

[Some Random Dude]

Hello.

So I just started High School in September, and things were going pretty good. I sit by all my friends at lunch and the hamburgers have less bone fragments in them. But for the past few weeks the group of people who choose to sit at the table behind us insist on throwing spit wads and food at one of my friends. I asked my friend what he had done and he said that he had told one of these people to shut up in class and that troubles had been escalading from there. So we've asked them politely to stop and we've reluctantly told adults. Nothing is getting done. All they do at lunch is call us names, throw things, and try to get my friend to fight their friend. Now I try to be polite and attempt to solve issues like this peacefully, but if I get beaned in the head with one more piece of broccoli, I'm going to stick my foot in someones ass. So I'm asking for help on here. Can anyone give me some advice so that my group of friends and I are'nt forced to beat the hell out of the other group of people?

[Chris.]

Well to be honest I'm pretty good in this subject as I have been on BOTH sides.

If this were me, I would throw things back - but thats my personal way to do things in a situation like this.

If you would rather not do that, I would once again, tell and adult. If that didn't work again, I would move your table. If they follow you, then you might have some problems, but I really think they will leave you alone if you move table. Atleast try it - attempt it, and see how it goes.

Best wishes,
Chris

[luck fife1]

you need to stop it now. if you let it go on it will never stop. take immediate action and if you do they shouldn't bother you again. be it fighting them or getting them suspended, do something/

[Chris.]

Although I do agree with standing up for yourself, and I hate bullying, I wouldn't recommend fighting them. The only think that will accomplish is a suspension on your record.

[ThornedRose]

Tsk....tsk...tsk that is rather childish of them to throw food. I would say confront them, NO FIGHTING by any means instead confront the main guy doing it and talk man to man, and most likely it will continue seeing as bullies are oblivious to others feelings, get to the root of the issue. I don't think fighting is the way to go about it but somehow show him/her/it/they that you wont tolerate it. Honestly, telling an adult almost never works and actually worsens the situation at times. Bullies always have some kind of issue and choose, cowardly, to take it out on others

[OMFG!You'reActuallySmart!]

Originally Posted by Some Random Dude

So I just started High School in September, and things were going pretty good. I sit by all my friends at lunch and the hamburgers have less bone fragments in them.

Fighting them in school is pointless and moronic as it does not solve any problems, it only creates them. Suppose your friend beats the living shit out one of the bullies and you all cheer. I'm pretty sure the bullies aren't going to be thrilled as they want their guy to kick the piss out of your friend, not the other way around. So, after getting a suspension on the academic record, you now have a bunch of very angry bullies to deal with.

Dealing with them relies on understanding the initial cause. They're likely at a higher social status within the school than your friend and want to be dominant. My idea is very risky but is has worked in the past, both for myself and others on the forum who used it. Ideally, get a large audience of students and have your friend confront the bully but without fighting. Rile up the audience and provoke the bully, get him angry but make sure no fists start flying (which is the hard part and why it's risky to use this method). When the bully comes at him, have your friend comment on how pathetic, weak and vain the bully is that he would want to fight him over a silly "shut up" remark. Tell him that if he does fight, then he'll show the entire audience how weak his is that he cannot take a minor insult without getting butt-hurt. If the bully gives an insult, comment how weak he is that he can give insults but is too fragile to take any, that he's putting up an illusion he's tough when in fact, he's not.

The goal of this method is to reduce the bully's mental domination over your friend. The school audience comes into play because if you play it right, many students won't support the bully, so it shames him and somewhat humiliates him. To successfully pull it off, your friend has to show confidence and when the bully comes forward, your friend shouldn't shudder in fear but smirk in confidence, even laugh. It runs the risk of the bully hitting your friend on the spot or later on as a result of being humiliated.

I mention only your friend and the 1 bully because they are the focus. The only reason your hair gets decorated with broccoli is because you're his friend and the bullies want your friend to get angry about that so he'll fight. If you fight (win or lose), it will either increase the food throwing or have no effect.

[Sea Monkey]

Hey there,

I'm sorry that this is happening to your group of friends. I'd suggest continuing to notify adults such as teachers you trust; Principal/Head teacher; your parents or any relatives regarding this issue as it's something that really does need to be solved before it escalates further, and it may also help to solve the rift on both parts. Keep telling them until something does get done, don't leave it to get worse. I'd recommend that you do not "beat the hell" out of the group, as that would bring you down to their level and it'll just cause more issues between the two groups, and you'll be highly likely to get into trouble for it and possibly held responsible, which is what I'm guessing you don't want to happen.

I hope things get solved for you and your friends, and if you need anything, please feel free to PM me any time!
Take care.

[Nostalgia]

Could you try sitting on a different table where there are others behind you so they can't sit there ? The other thing you could is ignore it and let them get on with it, when they realise you and your friends are not seeming to be bothered by this they may stop , or could simply tell a teacher or get clever and when they start throwing things film them on your phone (pretend to be texting and film them ) and then show it to a teacher, so then the teacher has the evidence they need as-well.

[BDF]

Do what I did. Pick up your cheesecake desert and slam it into their fucking ear from behind.

[OMFG!You'reActuallySmart!]

Originally Posted by BDF

Do what I did. Pick up your cheesecake desert and slam it into their fucking ear from behind.

What a waste of a cheesecake, unless you had a second one, in which case it's perfectly acceptable.

[BDF]

Originally Posted by The Man And XX Master

What a waste of a cheesecake, unless you had a second one, in which case it's perfectly acceptable.

No, what happened is the guy threw an apple core I think, or banana skin... some sort of fruit left over and it managed to land in my cheesecake. So actually he got more from me than just the cheesecake.

[OMFG!You'reActuallySmart!]

Originally Posted by BDF

No, what happened is the guy threw an apple core I think, or banana skin... some sort of fruit left over and it managed to land in my cheesecake. So actually he got more from me than just the cheesecake.

Well that's a completely different story because he assaulted the cheesecake causing it to be tainted. I probably would have moved it aside, finished the cheesecake and thrown the fruit back at him, however, it's also reasonable what you did. Got any pics?

[BDF]

Originally Posted by The Man And XX Master

Well that's a completely different story because he assaulted the cheesecake causing it to be tainted. I probably would have moved it aside, finished the cheesecake and thrown the fruit back at him, however, it's also reasonable what you did. Got any pics?

No lol. I have very few pictures of "school stuff"... so many things like this got forgotten... or went "unnoticed"... whatever you wana call it

[MichWolverineFreak]

My dead grandpa always told me to stick up for myself, and if you think you can, well, I probably would kick his ass.

[Some Random Dude]

We can't really move because it's been at least 3 months and all of the groups at school have just become settled into their spots. So if we were to move it would just cause more problems. They've also upgraded to pencils, milk cartons and whatever else they can find. The adults don't really do a thing about it. They're just there to keep us from stangling each other and to clean tables. I'm really close to losing it and sticking a lunch tray down one of their throats. I'd like to try the thing with the cheesecake too. It's funny because we're taking this from a bunch of kids who I thought were 7th and 8th graders when most of them are older than me, and I'm in 9th grade. We'll try some of the suggestions from the comments.

[Paradise]

Originally Posted by BDF

Do what I did. Pick up your cheesecake desert and slam it into their fucking ear from behind.

This is probably what I'd do, I have been bullied since First School and nothing really worked.. The second I hit year 10 though, the prats were dummed down and were failing GCSE's while I was gaining in qualifications.
I can't give any advice i'm afraid other than stick with your 'True' Friends.

[Nostalgia]

Reacting to violence with violence is not the best way to go unless you have to defend yourself, do you have to eat in the lunchroom ? could you sit in your form room or in a class room somewhere else ? or eat out on the playground or something ? also if the school is refusing to do anything you always have the option of going to the police and reporting these people for harassment or you could go to the school governors.