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Anxiety and Stress This forum is for seeking advice on anxiety and stress related issues.

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Relapsing? - March 31st 2018, 08:40 PM

For over 5 years Iíve had pretty bad anxiety that doesnít really get better. However I got to work with a fantastic CBT counsellor and he completed changed my thoughts and I was finally able to feel normal again. I was taught how to make phone calls, how to speak in restaurants, how to believe people actually like me, etc and I got discharged at the end of January. However recently itís neem getting worse again. A lot of my friends are getting noticed by other people and Iím not and Iím feeling like Iím not worth others time. A lot of my friends have got jobs as well and I havenít yet. Itís nearly the end of college and also feeling really anxious about my friends not seeing me again. I feel like they would get tired of me after a while.

I can do it and I can get through it. So can you xx
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Re: Relapsing? - March 31st 2018, 09:50 PM

Hey there, it's great that you've gotten the help you need with your anxiety; but I am sorry things are getting worse again. Is it possible to resume treatment, even though you've been discharged? I think it would also be a good idea to talk to your friends. I'm sure they'd understand, and especially if they know your history of anxiety and shutting down in the past.

Don't worry about not having a job yet as you're about the graduate from uni. It takes some time, but be persistent and don't give up! It would probably be a good idea to talk to your advisor or professors regarding using them in the future as a professional reference, or to get tips and ideas on how to secure a job after school is finished.

Best of luck, don't hesitate to reach out again if you need to.
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Re: Relapsing? - April 1st 2018, 02:45 PM

Hey there,

Relapses can happen, but it doesn't necessarily mean it's a bad thing or that somethings gone wrong. But it's important to keep in mind that when having a relapse of any kind, that you never go back to how you used to be before because you aren't that same person- you've been through CBT therapy, you know your triggers and how to deal with anxiety. Not only that but you know you coped before, so you will get through this again. You're struggling with anxious feelings at that moment, and that's okay.

What tools and techniques did you learn that helped? Maybe try using some of them again, or look into self-help websites and apps to help you get through this?

Anxiety can get worse when we compare ourselves to others. You feel your friends are getting noticed and you aren't. But that doesn't make you worthless. Your friends are getting jobs and you haven't got a job. But that's okay because not everyone gets a job right after school, and it can take a while to get a job anyway. We are often our harshest critics so how you feel might be different from the reality of the situation. This can also be applied to how you feel your friends feel about you- you don't know that for sure, and I'm sure you have plenty of qualities that your friends like that make you who you are, and they aren't just going to leave you if you don't have a job etc. Perhaps try to challenge these thoughts, maybe write them down and then underneath write a more realistic thought.

CBT therapy can be really helpful, especially with a counsellor that you really get on with. Though it's good to keep practicing what you learnt in CBT to help ease the anxiety. But don't forget there's no shame in going back into counselling, if possible. You might be able to talk to the college counsellor for support and to find other support for when you leave college. Or you can visit your doctor and ask for a referral for a CBT counsellor, as this may be free on the NHS. There's also organisations and private therapy that you could get support from too.

Take care

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