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Anxiety This forum is for seeking advice on anxiety and stress related issues.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Lovehatelife23 Offline
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UGH! - August 11th 2015, 03:30 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

My Anxiety has gotten worse over the years. I take Anxiety meds to control it but it doesn't seem to help. Its over my mom half the time. I have this Strong Anxiety over her that im going to lose her. If I don't hear from her I PANIC, if she doesn't answer the phone for about 10x or more I PANIC, If shes in the hospital or out driving somewhere im constantly WORRIED! She started having seziers but its gotten better since they put her on meds, but when she has a bad one I stay there beside her and make sure shes ok before I leave her. My anxiety is controlling me & its not fair!

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Celyn Offline
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Re: UGH! - August 14th 2015, 09:56 PM

Hey Leslie,

I'm really sorry that you are going through this. Anxiety can be hard to deal with, even at the best of times, let alone having genuine concern over your mom.

Have you talked to your mom about how you have been feeling? Since you are worried about her, how about arranging for her to call you (or the other way around) at a set time? This way, you can be reassured that you will be able to talk to her each day without getting so anxious. If she doesn't call or answer within a certain amount of time, you can call her again.

I understand that if your mom has been having seizures, you will obviously worry about her safety. I'm not sure where you are, but in the UK at least, if someone has seizures they aren't allowed to drive. If your mom driving concerns you, perhaps you could talk to her about using other modes of transport? Or car sharing? At least this way you can make sure she is safe.

As for yourself, the meds are mainly to help with the symptoms of anxiety, so it's understandable that you might feel they don't work given that your main source of anxiety is your mom's safety. Have you thought about having counselling? That might help in the long term as it aims to empower you and take back control of your life rather than let the anxiety control you.

Look after yourself too, and make sure you find time to relax. Perhaps journal about your feelings as it can take the edge off anxiety.

Take care

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Philomath Offline
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Re: UGH! - August 18th 2015, 08:21 PM

Hi There,

I am sorry you have been struggling with this.
I agree with Holly, talking to your mom could help a lot because she will be able to help you create a plan for when she is having seizures or a routine where the two of you can text back and forth or call back and forth as a way of calming your anxiety.
The anxiety medication may or may not be right for you. Many factors can affect medications however the cahces of being in the labOr?
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Palmolive Offline
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Re: UGH! - August 31st 2015, 01:42 PM

Hi there.

I'm sorry to hear you are going through a rough time right now but I'm glad you've come to us for some help and support. That shows a lot of strength in yourself.

Firstly, I want to say that in a situation I think it's normal to be worried and anxious about your mum. I struggle with anxiety but my mum and sister have health problems and I get anxious about them when I don't hear from them, but I don't think that is the anxiety I struggle from, I think that is "normal". When someone is going through something which could potentially cause them harm, people around them do get anxious and worry so try not to be so harsh on yourself.

However, I am not saying that you don't have anxiety and maybe this makes your "normal" anxieties about your mum a little bit worse which I can relate too. And I assume that you get anxious about a lot of other things too. When you get anxious you need to find what helps you in the moment and you also need to find the underlying reason to why you get anxious and deal with that issue/issues and you might be able to do so on your own, or you might feel you need help from a CPN/counselor/therapist. As much as medication might help, it's not going to take away the issue beneath it all but just help you cope with the symptoms. Saying that if you feel the medication isn't doing its job properly, talk to the person who prescribed you it. It might be you need a different dose or a different medication.

I hope that all made sense. Things like mindfulness and breathing exersises can really help with anxiety so check some out online maybe? Find things that work for you and feel free to reply back if you want too.

Take good care of yourself and I wish you all the best,

"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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