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Anxiety This forum is for seeking advice on anxiety and stress related issues.

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Calaer Offline
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No idea why this is happening; Again. - October 15th 2016, 11:37 PM

Okay. So I know I've posted before about this, but in a nutshell I have horrible social anxiety. I was diagnosed back when I was 10. For a while it got really bad. I wouldn't leave my house without my husband, Mom, Dad, or my husband's Mom. I couldn't even go outside to check my mail, let alone actually go somewhere like the store, or whatever. Anywho, one day, I bought a self help book. (Don't laugh. It's really good, and it's all for Social Anxiety) The book actually helped me. I was able to work the program, and was able to go in to the public and socialize. Now, I couldn't go in to a public bar during happy hour or anything, but I could go to the store, take my daughter to the park, and I wouldn't freak out so badly.

Well, now my anxiety is coming back full force. This has happened before, but it sort of died down this time it seems to be getting worse and worse. I'm not really sure what's going on. There hasn't really been anything such as a change that has caused this or anything. So I'm very unsure on how to handle this or what I should do.

I can't go see a therapist. My health insurance won't cover any visits. I've considered talking to my doctor about taking something for it, but I'm pretty unsure about that, because I'd rather find a way to over come this rather than just mask it with medications.

Anywho, any advice on what you guys have done or on how you guys think I should approach this would be awesome. Thanks in advance.

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Celyn Offline
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Re: No idea why this is happening; Again. - October 22nd 2016, 02:06 PM

I'm sorry to hear that you have had anxiety for a long time. There's nothing wrong with self-help books...I've read a few too, and think they are a great step in helping deal with anxiety (or indeed, any other issues).

Unfortunately, I think that anxiety can definitely come back. However, like most things in life, I think things do tend to come and go, much like you have the ups and downs in life in general. I think the trick is to get good at managing the anxiety, so that it wont bother you so much, if it does come back.

What did you find helpful with the self-help book? Was the book a collection of tips on managing anxiety, or was it more structured like a program? I think its important to remember that the are so many different types of self-help books, tips, advice etc., that sometimes it is just a matter of trying different things to suit you. Other times, it can be helpful to stick to a 'program'- there are many websites and apps that offer CBT for a range of different types of anxiety.

One thing that I do want to mention though is that sometimes we can put pressure on ourselves- we might feel like we have to make the self-help work, and if it doesn't, we can feel despondent. Try not to let this happen (easier said than done, I know). The other thing is not giving up on something that works for you. It's okay to have a relapse, or a bad day and you might not practice the technique so much, but try to stick with it even after reading the book, completing the program etc.

I can't really offer any personal experience, as I have mostly done the breathing techniques and mindfulness things. I'm wondering if perhaps small steps might help you? When I first started therapy I was terribly anxious and wouldn't leave the house. So my first task was to spend time sitting/standing outside my house. Even hovering by the door was good enough, or going on my phone etc. After spending 5 minutes, I would try to do 10 minutes etc., and slowly I found that I didn't need my phone and felt a bit more at ease. After that, I tried a short walk, just to the end of my street, and slowly increased the distance over time. Perhaps something like that might help?

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